Elsewhere in the forest, an epic battle for supremacy was raging.
"Get back here you damn squirrel!"
Pandora Lovegood soared overhead, landed in a tree several dozen metres away, and chitted at them, clinging upside-down to the far up tree trunk.
From atop their horse, Daphne swung her legs in frustration, wishing desperately that she'd brought Freekey along with them. "How are we supposed to do this? It's too far up to use the official stunner, accio isn't working and probably wouldn't count anyway, and neither of us are that good at climbing!"
From on the ground where she'd just completed her umpteenth hundred metre sprint, Hermione took deep, panting breathes. They'd been chasing the rodent for what seemed an age. Pandora was clearly playing with them, coming down low enough for them to reach her before dashing back up when they got too close. "What" *pant* "would our" *pant* "lord do?" *pant*
Daphne grimaced. "Fly up and tag her? Cut down every tree in the forest? Send a horde of snakes up to grab her?"
They looked at each other.
Daphne looked down at her shoulder.
The fluffy toy snake looked back at her.
"Um…" Daphne took a deep breath. "As the future Lady Slytherin, I command you to hunt that squirrel!"
The toy snake tilted its head, but didn't move.
Daphne looked back at Hermione.
Hermione shook her head. "If parseltongue even is family magic, I don't think you get it until you're actually married."
Far on the other side of the clearing, the squirrel taunted them with more chittering.
Daphne sighed. "At least we now know where Luna gets her… her…" She petered off.
"Her what?"
A look of pure evil crept over Daphne's face. She smirked, pointed her wand at her throat and muttered, "Sonorous." She felt the flow of magic going through her into the spell, felt the level, felt the flamelage. She grinned and repeated the spell on Hermione, earning a 'what are you doing' look from her fellow huntress.
"So, Hermione," she jumped down from their horse, tied it up, took Hermione's shoulders and started walking in the opposite direction from the squirrel, her voice booming over the clearing. "What did you think about that conversation we were having with Luna this morning?"
Hermione looked momentarily perplexed. "Which conversation?"
"Oh you know the one, the one about having children-" she reduced the flow of magic to their voice spells"-with our lord."
On the other side of the clearing, the squirrel's head shot up, suddenly totally focused on tracking their retreating backs.
Hermione's eyes widened slightly. She nodded. "Oh. Oh. Yes," she said, the words coming out slowly and deliberately. "You mean the one where she was asking about when we thought they should start?"
"Yes. That one."
They continued to walk away, out of the clearing, and towards a rocky outcrop. As she went, Daphne continued to reduce the levels on the voice spell. "I mean, we wouldn't want to give her the wrong kind of advice. You know how Luna is once she gets an idea in her head," she continued, bullshitting wildly.
They hid right behind a large rock and Daphne reduced the voice spell to nothing.
They waited.
Suddenly, not two feet away, the squirrel dropped onto the rock.
"Now!"
They whipped their wands up, but before either could get off a spell, the squirrel leaped straight at Hermione, scrabbled for purchase on her robe arm, and bit her hand.
"Oww!"
Daphne tried to adjust, but wasn't quick enough.
"Ouch!"
Both wands hit the ground.
Pandora leaped back onto the rock, turned, and smugly chittered at them in victory for a whole half a second, right before the fluffy snake lunged with the speed of a cobra strike.
There was a startled squeak sound.
Three seconds later it was all over. A firework shot into the sky and Daphne looked down at the now stunned squirrel, currently wrapped up in the tight coils of her plushy toy snake. She nursed her hand.
"Here," Hermione said. She took said hand and waved a spell over it. Moments later, the bite marks were completely gone.
"Thanks."
"No problem." Hermione looked down too. "Shall we?"
"Yes."
Daphne reached down to her toy. "I, um, command you to return to me."
The fluffy snake looked up at her and slowly climbed back up her arm until it was once again snuggly hugging her midriff and chest.
Hermione gave her a curious look. "You know, you are speaking English."
Daphne shrugged. "No idea, then."
Hermione frowned and pointed her wand at the squirrel. "Finite Incantatem."
The squirrel instantly came back to life, shuddered, and changed.
"Well done, girls! Five points to Slytherin." Pandora Lovegood beamed at them.
Hermione frown morphed to a wide smile. "Thank you, Lady Lovegood."
"A well played trick. I did not expect the toy. That's something a Lovegood would've done."
Daphne rubbed her hand, "Did you have to bite us?"
"Fair play, my future daughter in law. You were hurling some fairly hefty shots yourself."
Daphne felt her cheeks heat up.
Pandora Lovegood's eyes glinted. "So, tell me more about these 'conversations' you've been having."
Daphne squirmed. She felt her cheeks flush. "It wasn't really anything. Not really."
"Nuh uh uh. You don't get away that easily. You're going to tell me everything ."
Daphne groaned.
...
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