That Friday night, the Mantovani family was gathered in the back of the house where Loreto was working on the barbecue, ensuring that the juiciest meat was cooked to perfection. The music sounded on the radio, animating the environment to cheer a beta that would play the next day.
Carrying the plates out, Nathaniel helped his mother to set the table that counted with a bag of French bread and several salads. Just a little more and your sausage sandwich would be ready. Because it was his favorite snack, Nathaniel did not take his eyes off the grill as someone who could make the meat get roast faster.
— Guilherme, if you keep stuffing yourself with garlic bread will not want to eat meat later! — Scolded Arabella.
— But I'm hungry, mom!
Loreto finally took the first sausage from the grill, and quickly Nathaniel extended the plate without taking his eyes off the juicy meat.
— You'll drool if keep like this — Joked the stepfather, surprised by the blush on the cheeks of the stepson.
— Sorry.
— Haha, I'll prepare some more for you, if not your brother will eat it all.
— Thank you, Loreto.
The sandwich was finally assembled, and so the omega could eat all happy his favorite snack. Sitting at the table near the radio, the boy enjoyed that unique calm. A starry night, music and barbecue.
Could you ask for more?
When a familiar sound sounded on the radio, Nathaniel stopped eating to pay attention.
"Too much loneliness
It's dust that the wind does not undo
And live like this
It's like a nightmare that never ends
Everything for me
This love was all for me"
He knew that song. Nathaniel heard the original version of it, but what really played incessantly was that Portuguese version.
Immediately the memories came to mind. Nathaniel was about seven at the time, walking around the house at night when he heard music coming from outside. He remembered having the curious peep behind the door, because it was strange that Ares was looking at the sky in such a distant way.
That was one of the few times he thought he saw Ares sad about something.
— He liked that song.
Waking from the daydreams, Nathaniel realized that his mother was sitting in front of him watching the radio. The same look that he had in Ares, was found in the eyes of Arabella.
That made Nathaniel's chest tighten.
— Yes, he liked it.
— When we met, I lived in the village with my grandmother while my parents worked in the fields. And every Sunday I had to wake up early to go to church, and then I met with some friends to talk — She said with a smile on her lips — I was with the girls and he with his brothers' friends.
Oh, that was a new story. Ares used to tell about life before the rings, and always smiled in the same way that his mother did at that moment. A smile of nostalgia laden with pain.
— We were at that age when we started thinking about dating, and my friends always talked about the boys they liked, hehe. But when I was asked if I liked someone, I ended up looking in the direction of Ares.
— Did you like him?
— I wouldn't say that I liked it, but he always got my attention. My friends thought it was absurd, because Ares was so thin that the wind could take him. His hair was big and bulky and even his growing moustache was strange hahaha. My gosh, he was very ridiculous haha.
Nathaniel drowned his laughter as he tried to imagine Ares from his mother's descriptions. But he could have an idea, since it was another time and the fashion was different. For all he knew, the people of the countryside had a charm different from those who lived in big cities.
— Even so... it was impossible to take your eyes off him. Ares used to be shy and hardly spoke in front of others, and always followed the brothers up and down. But if he gave a break, he would find a way to escape and be alone in some corner.
— It's hard to imagine Ares being shy.
— It was easy to know when he was ashamed — Arabella pointed to the ears, and Nathaniel laughed at understanding — I think at that time we were about fifteen years old, it was when the June party of the church happened. The village child was eager to dance a gang, but that was because the boys had to invite the girls to be their date.
Pulling out the glass of soda, Nathaniel tried to imagine. He never got to dance gang, but after having returned to the country, the omega managed to participate in school's June party.
People dancing in plain clothes always seemed to have fun.
— I was without a date since I didn't like any of the guys who invited me to dance. I was almost thinking about calling the priest to dance, haha. But then Ares invited me, he seemed so nervous...
— Probably expected to be rejected.
— Sure he expected hahaha, but I accepted. And it was the best June party I had.
Nathaniel had seen pictures of his mother as a young girl, although they were photos of her with her family. She was beautiful as a porcelain doll. It would not be strange if the boys tried to approach to win her. But it was interesting to know that your mother rejected handsome boys to get with the weirdo of Ares.
Wish he had seen them together.
Arabella put her chin in the palm of his hand, continuing to face the radio.
"And wherever I go
I will take with me the marks of this love
I even tried
Find a way out, but I didn't
Ah, this love
This love was all for me"
Ares was his mother's first love. She did not hide the longing and sadness in her countenance. In moments like this, Nathaniel realized that he was not the only one to suffer with the absence of Ares. However, it was a fact that his mother had managed to move on.
Not for less, she already had a husband and a second child to take care of. If she collapsed, what would happen to the Mantovani?
Nathaniel knew, from the moment he woke up in the hospital and learned of Ares' death, that if he would weaken, his mother would also collapse. Perhaps that was one of the reasons why the omega did not allow itself to cry at Ares' funeral.
— Why did he leave? — Nathaniel asked with some hesitation.
Biting his lips, the omega regretted letting his thoughts escape. Yet the answer came naturally carried by the wind.
— Because the world was waiting for him.
Ares left his family and friendships, life in the countryside, to live in a strange place and become a boxing fighter. If there was an image that would always pop up in Nathaniel's mind, it was of Ares walking on his back with his fist raised like a true victor.
— Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if he had stayed instead of leaving — Nathaniel commented without thinking much — Would he still be alive? Would he be happy? It would not be necessary to hide and...
A tight hug surprised the omega. The peculiar aroma of his mother's perfume caught him unawares, not even having seen her get up to go to your side.
— That guy never regretted the decisions he made, my son. Ares was never the kind of person who looks back after choosing a path, and does his best to make sure everything ends well. He was always like that.
Ah, that's right. Ares was that kind of person.
In the end, in that memory, Ares had looked back when he noticed Nathaniel's presence and then opened a wide smile extending his hand calling him to listen to the radio with him.
Embracing his mother, Nathaniel smiled relieved.
Arabella loved Ares and certainly suffered with his death. Knowing his personality may have been a great comfort that helped her move on.
Nathaniel should mirror his mother. No other woman was as strong as her.
Removing the hug, Arabella stroked Nathaniel's face looking at him fondly. The warm and welcoming touch made the omega feel safe.
— You look like him at that time. Oh, but of course my son is more beautiful haha. I'm very lucky to have two boys so beautiful. I really am blessed.
— Mother... — He chuckled.
— Come on! There's more garlic bread in the freezer?! — Guilherme screamed from inside the house.
— Haa... I told you not to get clogged with garlic bread! You have a game tomorrow, eat meat to have strength!
As soon as Arabella stood up to calm the worms of her youngest son, the omega remained seated returning to face the radio that already played another song. Resting his arms on the wooden bench without a back, he raised his head to the starry sky and closed his eyes.
— Indded, this love was everything to me.