E L I S H A
"Let's do it,"
"Do what?"
"The practice, you, walking on the aisle and I'll be waiting for you to come to me."
France seems so serious as months came by. I was doing all my work and became busy. I sometimes going back and fourth to the Philippines because of him. I have a busy schedule and doing all things just to make it done fast. I wanted to focus on my work, I don't want to disguise myself and secretly go to his condo just because of this stupid game.
I also live with him for months now, but I barely stay because of my hectic schedules and my stay extend here. I can't wait to go back to my hometown.
We're here in front of the church, no cameras behind, just the two of us. We're looking a church for the upcoming wedding next year.
"Is this necessary?" I asked him twice.
I even noticed that he change a little. He's spacing out sometimes when I asked him. I wonder if he thinks of her again, feeling more guilty because of this shits.
"Yes, if we feel it maybe, this will be the last and you don't need to worry about anymore to find another church." He squeeze my hand. We both wear a white as I looked up to him.
"Alright, go."
I held the white dandelion flower both to my hands as I took a deep breathe. My heart was beating so fast as I slowly started to walk like it was real. My emotions keep overwhelmed as my heart starting to hurt and anxiety took me.
I took a deep breath one more time and tried to crack a smile while walking. He's so serious watching me like we're in love each other and ready to tie a knot.
We both just looked to each other. Nothing more as I felt more over whelmed. Tears started to show in my eyes as I hugged him tightly. He felt stiffened as he relaxed his shoulders and hugged me back.
'I love you and it hurts.'
"Please, let me hug you for a while." My voice cracked as I hide my face. Tears started to escape from my eyes and I can feel my body trembling.
I knew that he felt it too. My body and emotions betray me. I don't want to confess yet my action is already confessing.
"Eli, wag naman ganito oh." His voice sounded helpless. It's like he was confused or he just doesn't care for me.
"Next year," I tried to acted. "You'll be free. And I'll be thankful that you came in my life just for once. To help me escape, to make me happy and just once, I felt your care too much and being an overprotective of me. You're always there when I just wanted to break down because of my work. You're always there, standing beside me and gave me a comfort that I deserve. Thank you. I won't ever forget you. I'm still thankful that I become to know you. I never regret knowing you."
I released and held his face. I unconsciously face him and kissed his lips. It was so soft, I keep my lips from moving. My tears started to flow as he tried to push me off.
"I'm so sorry."
"You don't have to Eli. I'm so sorry, for not liking you back. I just can't. I know that you knew it from the start. And I just want to create a line between us after this. I'm only here, because of the contract, no reasons behind it. Now let's go."
We both keep the silence as we arrived at the mansion. I get out of the car quietly. I looked at him, wearing a shade. I knocked on the car window and he opened it. "Thank you. Take care."
I tried to smile and turned around to walk. My lips trembling as I walk inside the mansion. I stopped a bit when my twin was looking at me. I avoid his stare and go to my room to lock myself up.
I didn't noticed that he's following me into my room. I cried more when he enter to my room to give me a hug. "I don't want this kind of feeling, help me please."
"Shush, let me help you this time. You don't need to have a fake wedding. I don't want to see you hurt because of that guy twin, you know me right?"
I shook my head. "No, our mom will get mad at me. I-"
"You're still afraid of our mom. She started of this bullshits. And I knew you hate it from the start. What's happening now?"
I keep my silence and just cried on his chest. My heart hurts and still bleeding because of someone. It freaking hurts so much that I can't even stop my emotions right now.
"I promise you that this will be the last time I'll show my weakness to him. After this, I knew that I can do better and accept it."
"You must do. I know that you can do it. I love you and I'm here always."
My twin started to tell a random story not until I fell asleep on his arms. Until morning came and someone is calling. I held my phone and answer it without looking who's calling.
"Yes?"
[The most famous model and an actor wants to work with you. I'll send you his email and invited you also to the fashion week from Paris. Eli! This is a big opportunity for you ! He tried to reach you out so many times na pala!]
My manager called me as I woke up with my eyes widened because of his news. "Really?"
[Yes! Good thing the movie and the series are already finished with your lover partner. Take a rest for being an actress for a while and do the modeling. I need you to come here ASAP! You have a scheduled with your new brand perfume. Go and take your time. The van will arrived for a minute now.]
My manager ended a call so I don't have a choice but to do my morning routine. After a minute, the van was outside on the mansion. There's no one left in the house.
After arriving to the studio. My manager walked into my direction and we both go to the other room with full of make ups and some stuffs.
He kept talking but I didn't listen. My mind was on somewhere else. It still hurts but I know that I can't survive, knowing that he's still here and the contract still on going.
If he wishes to draw a line with me, then I'll do it.