I am not doing this. You can stop giving me Ciracurus, throw me out of the academy, dump me in some gutter, and bury all my records. I am not doing this.
- Yours Sincerely, Lucian
These are the words Lucian scribbled down with patience as his mind juggled through all the possible options he would be left with after he will be thrown out of the academy.
His first interaction with the Psycho girl was enough to scare him to his wits that he was ready to abandon the mission. That girl will not hesitate to kill him and Lucian refuses to give up his life for some stupid mission. He will find a way to get Ciracurus from elsewhere.
Tying the letter to a raven's leg, Lucian opened the window of his room to set the raven on its way. Watching the raven fade into the silhouette of the orange setting sun, Lucian felt an overwhelming urge to grow wings and fly far, far away as well. Sighing, he walked over the squeaky wooden floor to his bed. Lucian sat on the bed and replayed everything that had happened.
He came to this place, memorised all the secret routes and paths of the campus, inspected the building and its people, verified all the information that he was provided with, tried striking up a conversation with that girl, and got so scared that he might just quit the academy.
' Violet told me that the psycho froze everybody in this place. Is this how she felt that time? ' Lucian wondered.
Controlling somebody else's body and mind is not something Lucian is unaware of. He knows that techniques to manipulate the mind and body according to someone else's will do exist, but Lucian has always been pretty much immune to them.
' She was able to control my body without even lifting a finger. She could render me blind with my own 2 fingers. What would have happened if she had plucked my eyes out? That would have been very painful. I... for the rest of my life would be left defenceless. It's not like I have somebody who is ready to take care of me for the rest of my life... Great, now I feel scared and lonely. ' He misses Violet.
Lucian, having no memories of his past, has no idea if he had anybody ever to call a family. If he had any, then why weren't they looking for him? How did they let him end up in a place like that when the only thing helping him through life are words carved on the skin of his stomach? Until Professor Theodore had not discovered him, he spent his time understanding people, society, and how the world works.
And from what he understood about family, Violet was the closest thing to that. He can not tell her everything about himself, show himself in vulnerable moments, or ask for help. But her company makes things bearable for him.