Upon exiting Roswaal's office, a strange feeling washed over Makoto. He was confused, frightened, and utterly unable to make sense of what was happening. Too much information. Too many new things. Too many choices he never even wanted to be a part of. He was scared of the future—after all, he was just a simple high schooler.
He wasn't anything special. He didn't have some overpowered ability or the strength needed to save even one person. Even that time when he helped Emilia, Felt, and Rom during the fight with Elsa—it wasn't his achievement. It was Reinhard who saved everyone, arriving like a hero at the last moment.
The only thing Makoto truly had was his ability to Return by Death... and his luck. But he quickly dismissed both. Return by Death was a curse, not a blessing. And his luck? Chaotic. Sometimes it saved him, and other times he still managed to die—though technically, he never actually stayed dead.
"What... What am I even supposed to do?" he muttered, the question directed to no one but himself.
He recalled Roswaal's words about this being a test, about how his choices would prove a point. That only made Makoto angrier. Who was Roswaal to decide his fate? Why was he being forced into such grim choices? Why did others have to suffer because of him?
...He was used to it. He was used to pain by now. The thought of death didn't exactly faze him anymore.
Actually, no—that was the wrong way to put it. Makoto did fear death. Deeply. Dying was painful. And above all, each time he died, all his memories, all the bonds he had built with people… they were always shattered by Return by Death. People he'd grown close to—forgot him. Every time. And that wasn't fair.
His hand reached into his pocket, fingers closing around the insignia Roswaal had given him. His hands were trembling.
Was becoming a Royal Candidate a reward from fate… or a curse in disguise?
He had never sought greatness. In many ways, Makoto lacked ambition. He didn't have a clear goal, nothing he would die—or kill—for. He was more average than the word average itself. And somehow, that hurt the most.
What was he even supposed to do in a world like this? Just wander around aimlessly, like a marionette in someone else's play?
That just felt... unfair.
"Dear guest, may I ask why you're sitting in the middle of the corridor with the face of a lost puppy?"
Makoto winced at the harsh remark. It was the red-haired maid—Ram. Now that he thought about it, he had been acting strangely in front of everyone since the last loop.
"Is something troubling you?" she asked. Then, as if something clicked in her mind, she recoiled with a suspicious expression. "C-Could it be that you were fantasizing about Ram!?"
"Not even a chance!" Makoto exclaimed. "Seriously, why do you and Rem think I'm some kind of closet pervert?"
Ram blinked in genuine surprise.
"You're not?"
"Of course I'm not! Why do you look so shocked?!"
Ram gave a slight bow. "My apologies, dear guest. Seems I was mistaken about you being a closet pervert. Perhaps you're just an open pervert."
"I think you're completely missing the point here…" Makoto sighed.
But then, Ram looked at him with a softer expression.
"Now the look on your face is much better. You've gone from a lost puppy to one who's found its owner."
"...So either way, I'm still a puppy?"
"I suppose so."
She wasn't wrong. No matter how you looked at him, Makoto always kind of resembled a puppy—sometimes lost, sometimes happy. It wasn't something he was proud of... nor something he'd ever really be.
"Actually... thank you, Ram-san. I do feel better now."
Ram nodded. "So, care to explain what's bothering you, dear guest?"
"First of all, it would be great if you called me by my name."
"I'm sorry, dear guest... Naebaka." She gave a polite bow.
"That's better—wait a second, it isn't! Did you just combine 'Naegi' and 'Baka' into my name?!"
Ram looked away. "I have no idea what you're talking about, Naebaka-sama."
"You're doing it again!"
Makoto sighed. There was no stopping her now.
"Actually, I have a question, Ram-san."
"What is it?"
"Well... let's say you had to choose between saving two people really close to you... Who would you choose?"
She stared at him for a long while, then let out a sigh.
"I don't know the reason behind this question, but in my case, isn't it obvious?"
Makoto blinked in confusion.
"I'd definitely choose the group with Rem in it," she said bluntly.
"So you're saying... you'd choose the one with the person you care about the most?"
Ram nodded. "Precisely. But keep in mind, that's my choice."
"H-Huh?"
Ram sighed again. "You really are Naebaka. What I'm trying to say is—questions like this are useless. It depends entirely on the person. Because if I asked you who you'd choose... would you be able to decide?"
Makoto looked down at his hands, his brows furrowed.
"I... don't know."
"Exactly. That's the point. It's not that you can't choose. It's that you don't want to."
"I don't... want to?"
Her words confused him more than they revealed anything.
"Knowing you, choosing one over the other would tear you apart. Making that kind of decision just doesn't suit you. You're an idiot—a hopeful one. Even though I haven't known you long, I can tell. You're the kind of person who, instead of choosing one option, would go out of your way to choose both. Isn't that what idiots do?"
For a moment, Makoto's eyes widened. He caught a small smile on Ram's face.
"..."
"Wh-What? Why are you staring at me like that, Naebaka?"
Makoto quickly shook his head. "N-No, it's just... I'm surprised you said that."
Ram's expression darkened. Wind magic gathered in her palm.
"What are you trying to say, dear Naebaka-sama?"
Makoto broke into a cold sweat. "I-I didn't mean to offend y—OU!?"
A sudden wind blade flew past him.
"W-Wait, Ram-san, I was joking!"
Unfortunately, Ram was already charging toward him with a murderous aura.
Makoto, meanwhile, wore a small smile on his face—relieved.
Somehow... he finally had his answer.
Hey everyone! Time to answer a few questions I've received about this fic:
Q: Why did you make Makoto a Royal Candidate?
A: Great question! Honestly, I always felt like Makoto lacked character development—both in the games and anime. He's just the "hopeful guy" with not much depth. So I thought, what if he was put in a position of real responsibility? Managing political affairs while dealing with life-or-death stakes could be a great opportunity for him to grow into a capable leader. Plus, it's a fresh challenge for him—and he'll still die a lot, because... well, it's Re:Zero.
Q: Are you following canon?
A: I've decided to stray from canon, but not completely abandon it. I want to see how far I can go with my own story while keeping the tone of Re:Zero intact. For me, this fic is a writing exercise to improve my plot-building skills.
Q: Why add OCs?
A: This is a tricky one. I don't want the story to overflow with OCs, but since Makoto is a Royal Candidate, he needs a sponsor and a knight. I want to use Otto and Garf for those roles eventually, but they appear too late in the canon timeline. So that part needs tweaking—and yeah, I know if I mess with canon too much, some hardcore Re:Zero fans might go feral on me.
Q: What about the harem?
A: I'm not including a lot of romantic scenes right now because I don't think it suits the tone I've built. I also don't want to spoil who's in the harem—but yes, there is one. It should be pretty obvious by now, but I'll give you one spoiler: Priscilla is definitely in. Why? Because she's hot. And her dynamic with Makoto's chaotic luck will be hilarious to write.
Thanks again for reading! If you have more questions, drop them in the comments. Also feel free to toss in any story ideas—maybe they'll help inspire a future plot point!