There is something about being stupid and happy that brings me so much joy.
I was sitting in my office, not doing any work, and just looking for different spots I could propose to Ryder.
I mean, that's all I ever really thought about now, and as the days go by, that's all I really want to do.
I typed on my computer.
I had a Google document listing potential spots where I could propose to him, but none of them felt quite right. I wanted it to be special, because that's what he meant to me.
He was so God damn special, and he is actually who I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, my babydoll, my sweet baby.
The one who treated my daughter perfectly, who treated everyone so kindly, who brought me so much fucking joy, Ryder. My lovely Ryder.
I sighed.
I feel like the beach is the perfect place, but also it's not, because it doesn't feel private enough. I mean, maybe I can rent a side of the beach, just so it's us, but I feel like that's too much, and he would be worried about the cost.
Okay, now I don't know.
I stared at my document again.
Okay, so I copied the Spanish words he taught me from my Notes app into the document so everything was in one place. I will say a few of them and then say the rest of the proposal in English.
Okay, so that part's great and finalized, and the same with the rings, now back to my stupid location.
I sighed.
The boardwalk keeps coming back to mind, or…maybe we could go to the park where I first saw him?
I rubbed my temples.
God, I don't know. It all sounds wrong.
My brain is completely mashed right now. I don't remember proposing ever being this hard. I just bought the ring, brought it with me somewhere, and just proposed. I didn't think about all of this.
I sighed again.
Okay. So proposing at a restaurant feels too pretentious.
I typed on my computer.
No restaurant, no park, at home is weird, at his parents' house is weird, at a nightclub would be weird and probably a sensitive subject for him, and now that just leaves me with the beach.
But he's going to get suspicious if I ask him to go to the beach, because, well, I can't swim.
I stood up, shut off my computer, and walked out of my office.
I climbed up all of the stairs and made my way towards Isabella's room.
I knocked slowly on her door, "baby cakes."
I heard shuffling, and I smiled as Isabella opened the door and gave me a weird look, "What?"
"Hi, baby."
"Hi, Dad, what do you want?"
"Can I come in?" I asked her.
"Yeah, sure," she said, stepping out of the way as I walked into her room and went to sit on her bed.
"Do you want me to shut the door?"
I nodded, "Yes, please."
Isabella shut the door behind her. "What is your problem?"
"I can't come spend time with my daughter!" I said as my eyes scanned her room.
"I mean, you can," she said and sat on the bed next to me, "but this is weird."
I smiled at her and quickly hugged her, "You know me so well, baby…How has school been?"
"Okay, 180, it's been fine."
"Just fine?"
"Yeah," she shrugged at me.
"How's basketball?"
"Also fine. I'm glad that Ryder has come to a couple of my practices."
I smiled, "Me too. Sorry, I couldn't come to any of them," I said, and she shrugged again.
"It's whatever, I know you're busy."
"It's not an excuse, though."
"Don't think about it like that. Anyway, why are you here?" She asked.
I itched my head.
"Okay, now you have to tell me, you are being so weird," Isabella said, turning around to look at me.
"I want to propose to Ryder, but like for real."
Her eyes went wide, "Are you being for real?"
I nodded sheepishly, "Oh my god, congrats, Dad."
"Thank you."
"Does he know?"
I laughed, "That would ruin the surprise."
"Oh, sorry, I wasn't thinking about that. Do you have the ring?"
"Yeah, I bought one with a big diamond and then another one with just a normal band with a couple of diamonds on it, so it tones it down."
"Okay considerate, go you father."
"Thank you, thank you." I wasn't quite sure what she just said, but I think it was positive, maybe even a compliment!
"Where are you going to propose to him?"
"That's actually why I'm here. I need your help."
"You need my help?" She asked, pointing at herself.
"Yes."
"He's your fake fiancé, and you don't know where you want to propose to him?"
"Well, I have a list, and I think I wanna do the beach, because that's where we had our first official date, but if I do another surprise date, I think he's gonna get suspicious, and if I ask him to go to the beach, he's gonna be like, 'Why? You can't swim.' So that's where you come in, my beautiful daughter."
"Go on."
"I want you, maybe in a couple of days or so, to bring up the idea of the beach, and I will be like 'oh no,' and then Ryder will be mad at me for saying no, and then I'll end up folding, and we'll go to like a pretty private spot on the beach. Then we will have a family beach day, and then BANG I get down on one knee, and we fly off into the distance and have our happily ever after."
Isabella started laughing, "Your eyes are huge right now, Dad."
"Sorry, I'm very excited."
Isabella snickered. "That's awesome. Okay, yeah, I would love to help you."
"Okay. It's a plan, then. Please don't tell Ryder I'm…."
She cut me off, "I know, dummy."
I smiled at her, reached over, and hugged her. "I love you, baby."
"I love you too, Dad, but a hug is too far."
I kissed her cheek and then quickly pulled back, standing up and heading for the door.
"Get out!" She said.
"I'm leaving, baby cakes, I love youuu," I said, dragging out the u as I shut the door behind me.
God, I'm smiling so much. I don't think life could get any better than this, really.
I know everything might go wrong with the proposal, but that's okay as long as it's Ryder; I am happy, so fucking happy.