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Chapter 14 - Chapter 9: Self and unself (Pt.1)

Beyond the door lay a vast chamber, where shadowy figures knelt in silent reverence before an ominous, coffin-like structure. The coffin stood upright, encased in a glass cover, revealing a mummified corpse clad in a black priest's robe. The flickering flames from nearby torches cast eerie shadows across the room, their crackling sound amplifying the tense, oppressive atmosphere.

Before the worshippers stretched a grisly path of decapitated bodies, blood splattered across the altar in a violent and brutal way. The silent congregation remained unmoving, their foreheads pressed to the cold stone floor, as if frozen in time.

Suddenly, a piercing sound cut through the air, followed by a chorus of dissonant, guttural chants that reverberated hauntingly through the chamber. The words, though fragmented and distorted, grew louder and more coherent.

"Lord, hear our prayers, and grant our desires. Your light, like the morning sun, illuminates the darkness buried in the earth. Bring down the hammer of your wrath from Heaven! Let there be no peace for those who repudiate your might. Praise the Lord, who is born unto us!"

"Y-Yohan," Eric whispered softly yet trembling. He broke into cold sweat, with his hand clasped together. "I think I know some of them. Remember the village we visited before the church? I have been having an eerie feeling since the start, I-I can't believe they're all here! Look, that's Mrs and Mr Campbell, and even their child is there with them. What's going on?"

"This is… quite more serious than I thought," Yohan said in amusement. "So here's where they all have been."

"What should we do now? I can't just walk out pretending I didn't witness this whole cultish thing!" Eric exclaimed. His teeth gritted nervously at those familiar faces getting hypnotised. Their eyes devoid of any free will as they mindlessly chanted.

"I can't stand this anymore! Please, wake up!" Eric impulsively shouted, stepping into the crowd of worshippers. 

Before Yohan could say anything, the collective movement of the mindless worshippers stood up and turned their heads at them like zombies. Eric halted his step and met with pairs of soulless eyes. 

"Those who defied God's will shall be punished!" They screamed, charging toward the both of them.

"Not good, Eric dodged!" Yohan yelled as he unsheathed his sword.

Activating his Calibre, Eric enhanced Yohan's physical abilities while smoothly avoiding the crowd.

"Remember, they're the villagers, not monsters. Best if you can avoid injuring them! Knock them out while I try to get near the coffin!"

"Understood," Eric said, following Yohan's instructions. He swiftly moved behind the villagers and hit their neck, which caused them to temporarily lose consciousness. They weren't acting like humans, the children would jump and try to bite Eric arms or legs, the bigger body builders would overwhelm them and block their way to reach the coffin. As if on command, they protected the coffin with their bodies. 

Eric was quickly swamped with uncontrollable violence, but he reminded himself to be careful with the children. Amidst the chaos, Yohan was able to step onto the altar and face the glowing eyes of the corpse. Noticing the cause of the frenzy, Yohan quickly shouted, "ERIC, DON'T LOOK. CLOSE YOUR EYES."

Then, a wave of strong wind swept through the room. The crowd screeched in unbearable pain as they tore their skin and dug into their eyes. Seeing the horrendous self inflicting acts, Yohan issued another instruction.

"Eric, continue to knock them out, but with your eyes closed."

"EXCUSE ME, WHAT?" Eric retaliated. 

"Yea…Just buy me some time."

Yohan gripped onto his sword and scanned around for a certain object. 

The hardest thing about this 'boss fight' was that they couldn't kill any of the villagers, and they must be blinded to avoid the manipulation effects. The whole room was emitting a hue of greenish smoke, with a distinct pair of red eyes controlling the crowd. When Yohan noticed it, he made eye contact with it way too long. However, he was surprised that he was unaffected by the effect. 

Realising it might be the ability to resist mental Calibre given by the system in his first run, he wasted no time to search for the object. In that instant, his eyes caught the attention of a bejeweled papal ferula, wrapped with a heavy layer of greenish and adorned with tiny, bright red gems at the core of the cross.

'I really dislike touching holy relics,' Yohan furrowed his eyebrows in abhorrence. Holding the sword directly at the edge of the glass case, Yohan pushed it with great strength. The glass cracked to the middle and shattered explosively. Ignoring the shards that scratched his face, he took the staff and tried to break it. However, the staff was extremely solid, as expected since it was made out of gold. 

"Eric, how are you feeling?" Yohan asked.

"I-I'm fine. Just out of breath. Are you done yet? Can I open my eyes?"

"No. If you're not drained yet, can you increase your physical enhancement for me please."

"Ah, okay, by how much?"

"To your limits."

After a brief break, Eric finally said, "… you really demand a lot." 

With a gradual increase, Yohan observed his veins popping intensively with the aura becoming more opaque. 

'Breaking it with bare hands won't do the trick,' Yohan thought as he gathered his hands with the sword pointing towards the core. Infused with the spreading aura, the sword trembling by the pressuring force. Yohan raised his arms and stabbed it into the gems, causing an explosion. With the effect becoming weaker, the zombie state worshippers slowed down their aggressiveness. However, it wasn't enough, a small number of the gems cracked, but the rest was withstanding the impact. 

Yohan tried to stab it numerous times, deeper into the staff and through the ground. This had caused massive earthquakes which the brick debris shook. Eric, who has noticed the change of scenery, took it as a sign to open his eyes without requesting for Yohan's permission. 

Eric quickly glanced around him, the scene had gone eerily still. The villagers lay sprawled across the ground, motionless as if in a deep sleep. But he knew it was too late. They were no longer alive.

The gruesome sight of torn flesh splattered across the floor, faces unrecognisable and twisted in horror, their eyes bulging wide with expressions of resistance and helplessness. Eric's ears rang incessantly. Memories of the once-flourishing neighborhood flashed before him—their smiles, bright eyes, and laughter echoed.

"Why?" they asked, voices hauntingly unified. "Why did you abandon us?"

Their faces twisted grotesquely as the filter of his memories darkened. Still, they smiled, bloody lips stretched too wide, fingers dripping crimson as their limbs elongated unnaturally. Clasping his ears, Eric tried to silence the voices. His head lowered, the floor beneath him seeming to stretch endlessly, the echo of approaching footsteps growing louder.

A pair of shoes stepped into view, ones he recognized all too well.

"Your lack of resolve has killed them all," the voice boomed. "The villagers welcomed you, trusted you, and your selfish curiosity about a haunted church cost them their lives!"

He knew that voice. It was his own.

"You never miss a chance to ruin things, do you?" Eric pant, sweat trailing down his face. He didn't dare look up. He already knew whose face stared at him, his own, with merciless eyes he once bore.

"Say I'm right," the voice demanded coldly.

"No," Eric's voice trembled.

"Stop wasting time in this inner conflict. I am you. You are me. If you stay in denial, your partner will die too."

"What?" Eric looked up, startled.

"See for yourself, your partner fighting alone while this pathetic version of you hesitates. Haven't you learned? The world doesn't revolve around you." A crescent smile curled across the face. "You're self-aware. You know who I am. So say it."

"Say what?" Eric challenged. "You're trying to manipulate—"

"Submit," the voice thundered in his mind, as though a divine hand crushed his skull. "Submit to your Calibre, gifted by your god, shaped by you."

His core ruptured.

A sudden surge of power exploded around Yohan. His aura, once obedient to his control, twisted unnaturally, becoming dense, physical, like breath itself. It infiltrated his body, severing his link to the energy stream he had maintained. Pain surged through his heart, stopping his movement cold. He gasped, clutching his chest, losing grip of his staff as he collapsed. His body convulsed uncontrollably, desperately fighting to breathe.

"W-What? Eric, control yourself!" Yohan shouted. But he was met with a blank stare that slowly morphed into a sinister smirk. Eric's eyes turned black and soulless.

"Right… Sorry about that," Eric said slyly, loosening his grip and releasing Yohan from the invisible hold.

Sensing a shift in atmosphere, Yohan sharpened his senses. Behind him, the lifeless villagers melted into a sea of black blood, rippling as Eric took calm steps forward.

"Don't worry. I've taken care of them. You should focus on your task, Yohan."

"I didn't ask you to kill them. I only knocked them out," Yohan said with rising anger. But sensing the situation could escalate, he didn't push further. He stood, dusted himself off, and forcefully retrieved the staff from a corpse.

"Let's go. One last room before this place collapses."

As they continued, the oppressive silence gnawed at Yohan. Yet his mind stayed fixed on one thing: Who's with me now?

He knew it was still Eric, not an imposter. But something felt off.

An alter ego? Perhaps. But Eric never struck him as someone with fractured mental states.

Suddenly, Yohan stopped walking.

"Hm?" Eric asked.

"Are you… feeling okay?" Yohan turned to him with a rare look of concern.

"Yeah? I mean, what can I say? The villagers brought this on themselves. No matter how much I tried to avoid it, it was inevitable. Of course, I am…" Eric's voice faded after mouthing a word. His expression hardened, only to mask itself with a faint smile.

"Anyways, thanks for being concerned."

"Ah, okay. I just thought you'd be more emotional about their deaths," Yohan said bitterly.

"I just don't want to slow you down. Sorry if I sound detached, it's how I cope."

"Really? Is that why you're putting up a front now?" Yohan's eyes pierced through him like razors, sharp and unforgiving.

"I never thought I'd face a Calibre with its own consciousness," Yohan murmured.

"I get it. You're scared. Paralyzed by fear. I don't like your self-destructive mindset, but none of this is your fault. The people choose their path. Their fates are their own. The innocent? They just didn't know any better."

"I know. That's why I'm staying calm," Eric defended. "So, let's go before the debris buries us."

"Alright, but let me do this," Yohan said gently.

Eric blinked in confusion and stepped back as Yohan reached out and placed a hand over his chest.

"Please think nothing of it."

Yohan's voice echoed softly, calming and entrancing. Before Eric could speak, the world shut itself off around him, plunging him into unconsciousness.

Laying his head down carefully, Yohan finally caught his breath as he stared at the ruminating bell, connected to Eren's. It served as a safety measure in case his Calibre, Berserk, went out of control.

"But that was unexpected," he murmured.

Calibre. To many, it was believed to be a gift from God, granting humanity an edge for survival and superiority. A divine manifestation of the soul. But that was only half the truth.

In reality, Calibre feeds on the lifespan of the soul. The deeper the desire for power and control, the more chaos it unleashes. Chaos that surpasses human understanding.

God calls it fair play.

Calibre is the supernatural's counterpart. That is probably the reason it defies all logical laws.

It can take the form of madness itself, molded by the bearer. A reflection of their past, their regrets, and the traits they lack but secretly crave. Their morals and values shape the very being they confront. It isn't a loss of control. It is submission to their own self-loathing.

The greatest enemy is oneself.

Eric was a victim of his own Calibre.

That terrifying realisation sent a chill through Yohan. He glanced at his hand, troubled by a deeper question.

He didn't belong to this world. Under the normal conditions, he shouldn't have been capable of suppressing a Calibre user. Yet, in the previous timeline, the system granted him a form of exemption. An immunity to psychological Calibres. It wasn't physical, nor did it impose mental effects on others.

It was like a fourth wall. What would traumatize a character does not affect the reader.

And yet, something felt off.

It was as if the world had accepted his presence, integrating him into its fabric.

A Calibre existed within him. Or so it seemed. It had taken the form of an advanced mental immunity.

Nihility.

A Calibre that doesn't exist.

A delusion that denies existence itself.

After witnessing the true nature of a Calibre's control, Yohan had no desire to interfere with the natural order of this world. Not even if it offered him an advantage.

His past experiences had taught him enough. Never tamper with what defies reason.

Rising to his feet, he continued his journey, leaving Eric still resting on the ground.

"I'll be back," he said politely, before turning away.

He had a destination. A room that held answers, its importance revealed only after the massacre. The room where the disease had been created. The true experimental lab.

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