Summary:
A nice normal family meal, what could possibly go wrong?
"I don't get it." Vee turned to Hunter, who had a baffled look as the group hung out in her room, watching one of her favorite movies. "If he does have a Highly Adaptable Metallic Arsenal System-" Hamas, super funny. "-Then why doesn't he just make a lock pick? Why blow up the wall and alert all the guards?"
"Never thought I would agree with Golden Boy over practicality, but yes, here we are." Lucci nodded. "Dog Copter should use his invisibility mode and sneak into the main baddie before going in guns blazing. Not to mention the butt missiles are just impractical. It's too sensitive. One sneeze or bad case of indigestion and things will get messy."
"And that adds to the charm. You'll never know how he does it, but Dog Copter will always save the day." Vee grinned. "Besides, he's an animal. He's not going to go for the most logical choices. Lion doesn't show up in any of the battles, and the Palisman mostly just hangs out in Lucci's hair or with Spinel."
"Where did you guys put the pink gem this time?" Connie asked, looking around as if she'd pop up just by speaking her name.
"Scavenger hunt." Lucci answered. "I told her to head towards Mr. Universe's barn and bring back the scrap metal. Figured some of it would be useful one way or another."
"Mr. Universe? Not sperm donor?" Boscha asked, having been doing her nails the entire time. "Don't tell me you're going soft on the guy."
"I'm not. Just figured since he's actually attempting to not be a piece of snoreshit, I'd stop harping on him. I mean, he gave me a car and hotdogs. That counts for something."
"These things are good and more filling than normal earth food, what's in them?" Gus asked, taking a bite of a hot dog.
"You don't want to know…" Luz winced. "Legend has it that there isn't even food in there."
"Weird…" Amity muttered. "So you think I can replicate that machine stuff with my magic? Robots are just metal abominations after all."
"It wouldn't hurt to try, I guess, although magic and science on the boiling isles was a bit of a blur. It just seemed to mix in a sort of gray area from what I remember." Luz said.
"What's the human definition of magic?" Willow asked.
"Pretty much just wave a wand and whatever you want happens. Rules vary from source to source." Connie answered. "In Unfamiliar Familiars, it's all about connections between souls to generate energy."
"Isn't that just a convoluted way of saying the magic of friendship?" Gus asked.
"Not when you can summon multiple demons and trap them in a bottle to use as a fuel source as their souls erode." Vee replied. "But yes, friendship is the strongest of magics throughout the lands… if only it was nutritious." She sighed.
"Yeah….friendship ain't exactly what did Belos in. If anything, it was the opposite." Lucci smirked. "Speaking of,what's the status of that blonde what-thist woman? She sounds cool but I can't tell if she's trying to be helpful or playing with us."
"She gave off the same kinda vibes me and Bria had in the Boiling Isles." Boscha shrugged.
"Overconfident Alpha Bitch?" Willow asked.
"Screw you, but yes." Boscha reaffirmed. "There was an aura of dominance in her voice. She has control over the conversation, and she knows it."
"And sadly, because she has Ms. Noceda's backing, I can't just beat the answers out of her." Lucci complained.
"And because it's wrong to hurt people… right." Vee accused.
"Vee, if I lived by that philosophy, I would have died a LOOOONG time ago." Lucci responded. "Literally everyone in this group has beaten someone to a pulp at some point in their lives."
"It's only to people who deserve it, like my mom." Amity added. It was an uphill effort to not get these guys to resort to hospitalizing every human they met.
"Speaking of which, it's almost time for my mom's daily check up text." Connie looked at her phone in anticipation.
"Aww, she cares." Willow cooed.
"She does, but she gets overboard. One time, she drove up to me with a defibrillator because I was near a store with trans fats." Connie rolled her eyes.
"What's a defibrillator again?" Hunter asked.
"Electricity to get your heart started again." Gus explained. "Wait, if Lucci's electric proof, would it work on him?"
"If my heart stops working, you have permission to punch my chest until it does." Lucci said.
"I think we're finally starting to get along, Clawthorne." Hunter smirked.
RING RING
"Mute the tv! Mute the tv! Mom's making a call instead today!" Connie yelled.
Vee fumbled for the remote, before pressing the mute button. "Everyone, quiet." She shushed the witches. "You're good to go."
Connie cautiously looked over her phone with fear, before slowly pressing the answer icon. "Hello, mom." She said nervously. "I'm hanging out with my friend, Steven Universe… yes, mom, that's his actual name."
"If there's one good thing about my earth life, is that my bio dad picked a great last name." Lucci mumbled.
"Anyone else….I'm also with…Luz Noceda….no mom, it was just a misunderstanding last time … yes, I understand we hit Amber hard enough to cause a concussion." There was a moment of silence. "A talk with the family …" She looked around. "Ah…we're at Steven's now so Ms. Noceda is unavailable…Steven's mom….uh…."
"Garnet, it's for you!" Vee called out instantly. The gem instantly walked by with a curious look. "Connie's mom wants to talk to my mom."
They nodded, picking up the phone. "Hello there, I'm Mom Universe." Vee and Connie instantly facepalmed. "What are the kids doing …" She paused. "They're playing swords." Loud murmuring could be heard. "Sorry, they're playing with swords….oh no, they're bleeding, and now they're dead. Don't call again." She hung up.
They all stared at Garnet. "... HOW!?" Lucci shouted. "HOW ARE YOU THAT BAD AT LYING!?"
"Sapphire panics on the spot and Ruby says whatever comes to mind when flustered." She explained with a shrug. "Those parts do not add up to a good liar."
"You didn't even have to lie that much! You could've just said we were watching a nature documentary or something! Even I'm not that bad!" Luz exclaimed.
"It was on the spot, my instincts took over." Garnet said in her usual monotone. "I'm sorry for ruining your friendship."
"It's not ruined, I'm sure Connie's mom has a wonderful sense of humor." Vee said. "Right?"
"Vee….the humor was DRAINED and surgically removed from my mom the second she became a doctor." Connie said. "I'm sorry, but I don't think she'll let me be your friend anymore." No…
"So are we ignoring this or doing the same thing we did for Amity's Womb Donor?" Lucci asked.
"What did you do—?Right, forgot." Connie groaned. "No. No beating up my mom. The best way to handle this is talking to her upfront about it. I'm calling her right now." She got on the phone, where it began buzzing rapidly with worried texts. "Okay, calling… calling …" There was an instant pick up. "Hey, mom—" Shouting over on the other side. "No, I'm fine—" More shouting occurred. "I… yes, ma'am." She hung up. "I'm heading back home immediately for a check up."
"Okay…I'll…see you tomorrow?"
"Hopefully." Why did that feel like wishful thinking?
========================================================================
Luz watched as Vee slithered back in forth across the living room of the temple. "This is terrible, so terrible, so terrible, so unbelievably unthinkably terrible! I'm not going to be able to ever see Connie again!"
"Come on, Vee. It's only been one day. That's not the end of the world." Amity reassured Vee.
"You say that, but you think it's the end of the world whenever there's a day when you don't see, Luz!" Willow countered.
"That's because Luz actively runs towards danger." Her girlfriend made a solid argument.
"Look, Vee, it's not as bad as you think." Lucci assured. "We can always sneak Connie out in the dead of night."
"I'm not one who breaks the law just because I'm slightly inconvenienced."
"You can always just meet up at the park or something. Her mom isn't constantly watching her twenty-four seven." Luz reassured.
"After that disaster with Garnet on the phone, there's no way she ISN'T going to be doing that from here on out. She'll probably put a child tracker on her and watch her every move twenty four seven!" Vee shouted.
"So Amity's mom, the heartless person with no redeeming qualities?" Willow asked.
"Would you stop assuming we need to hurt adults!?" The Basilisk shouted in rage.
"Vee, relax." Luz assured. "I've gotten Connie into worse trouble, yet I'm still able to hang around her."
"Isn't that just because you guys go to the same school?" Gus asked.
"True, but the woman hasn't tried to get me expelled yet, or get a restraining order, so I'm probably in the clear."
"Not really. It's by the skin of your teeth mom hasn't sued your family yet." They turned their heads to see Connie.
"Connie! You're back! Did you run away from your mom?! Are we going to run away on a train together and sing folk songs like the no home boys, living off the lamb and bathing in ponds and waterfalls!?" Vee charged at the girl.
"No, no, no running away, that's not on the agenda…"
"That's on my agenda." Amity raised her hand.
"...I'm only here to give you a heads up. Mom wants to meet up with our parents…as in your parents and Luz's mom."
"Ah…" The Basilisk nodded. "I see…" They put a hand to their chin. "Sapphire and Ruby are too short to make a believable mom… Garnet would, but where would we get the other… Oh, I could grab Amethyst."
"Yeah… they already know about Mr Universe…" Connie winced. "I had to tell them that this was a 'regular' family to stave off any worries or concerns."
"Dang it." Vee sighed. "I'm sorry, Connie."
"We can still salvage this." Lucci stood up. "Vee, Connie, are you two certain that beating up Connie's mom is completely off the table?"
"I will use my limited sword training to do whatever minimal damage I could do to you in retaliation, yes." Connie nodded with a dead look.
"Then we have to go with our second best option. You already told a lie, so now's the time to follow through on it." Lucci said.
"Okay… yeah, I can lie. I've lied my whole life." Vee nodded. "We just need to stop Mr Universe from… doing anything bad."
"A very valid concern, and I know how to get him to back off a little.." Lucci rolled his eyes. "I'll….have to play…Steven again."
"You sure?" Vee asked.
"Hey, I'm not about to let another a-hole adult rip apart a friendship." Aw, that was sweet, though Luz did have one concern.
"I have a question about the plan." Luz said. "Why do we need Greg?"
"Because I told my mom Steven lives with a nuclear family."
"Gem's are radioactive?" Lucci asked. "I just thought the explosions were space tech."
"I'll explain later, but I was asking about why do we need him specifically ?" She reiterated. "We have multiple shapeshifters in our gang. Vee alone could make the skills necessary if she needed Lucci to play Steven."
"I…I don't….I want to be there….as myself." Vee stated with a blush. "I want to be a part of Connie's life, and the first step to that will be showing her…myself…as much as I can at least without showing the..demon parts."
"Alright …" She turned to Lucci. "Let's see if we can one up your shapeshifting then."
"Luz, as much as I hate it, we're going with Mr. Universe." Lucci stated. "He's not…a complete hopeless bastard.
"Debatable." Connie grumbled.
Luz sighed. "Alright, then I guess that takes care of you… that leaves me going with mom… Amity, would you like to be my date?"
"Yes. As awkward as it's going to be, I know it'll be more awkward if you do this alone." Amity held her hand tightly. Well, that was one plus.
"Okay, and if I'm going… it'll be as Vee Universe, daughter of Garnet Universe." The Basilisk grinned, shifting her hair into something longer and curly, shaping up her face a little to give off more of Garnet's 'square' head shape. "Do I make it work or what?"
"You have your mama's great looks." Garnet said from the kitchen, giving a simple thumbs up.
"That also leads into something else. Garnet, you have to be the mom since Connie's mom already heard your voice, and we're going to need to stay consistent." Lucci said. "That also means you can't freak out like you did on the phone."
"I'll do my best to keep quiet and calm." The gem nodded, looking themselves over. "I should try to form some kind of dress…"
"Wait, what about me?" Boscha questioned. "Luz get's to bring her date. Can't Lucci bring me?"
"They don't have a lot of hat options in fine dining." Connie winced. "Amity can get away with it with her growing hair…"
"So could I…"
"That can cover both your eyes and ears?" Luz pointed out.
"If I use some illusions we can sneak into the catering staff like the crew of Dog Copter." Gus suggested.
"Do you really think that'll work?" Connie asked incredulously.
"We were able to convince two grown men that this place could be a legit restaurant. Pretending to be waiters isn't outside the realm of possibility." Willow mentioned. "Besides, Lucci's going to need us there."
"Aww, you guys wanna support me." The kid smiled.
"Yes…but also because we know you hate being called Steven, so we're basically going to be the safety net to stop you from murdering someone."
"It's not that I hate being called Steven, I hate when people say it assuming they know who I am and what I'm going to do, like Pearl does." Lucci explained.
"Plus, there's also the fact that Boscha tends to threaten to light everyone on fire, so you're going to need back up for that." Hunter pointed out. "You know, because she hates humans so much."
"I don't hate ALL humans. The Pizza family is pretty decent." Boscha injected.
"Also we need someone to keep an eye on Spinel." Vee said. "No offense, Lucci, but she can be … clingy and loud."
"She's doing her best. She's still out getting that barn scrap—"
CRASH
"LUCCI! I got that metal you wanted and formed it into a ball!" Said gem shouted as she used it to wreck the front door.
"… Get Lapis and Amethyst." Lucci amended.
"This is going to be a night of either hilarious hijinks or high drama." Luz sighed, already knowing the drill.
========================================================================
Priyanka parked the car right outside the restaurant, putting it into park. Connie always talked about Steven before… but after that phone call she put in some research into the family. What was red flag number one was the sheer lack of information. Sure, no notable social media posts meant the child at least wasn't addicted to screens. It was the little she DID find out about that was red flag number two.
The boy's father, Greg Universe (she couldn't believe that was the family's actual name) had a …reputation around town, one of the deprived kind. For all intents and purposes, he was the town drunk. While she believed that a child was ultimately separate from their parents, if the boy grew up under that kind of man's roof, he was either on the road to depravity or in need of child services.
As for the mother… absolutely nothing. There was no mention of her, anywhere. No birth records, no presence in town, nothing. Priyanka's current theory was an adoption, which for a single drunk spelled trouble for whatever type of mindset that child grew up with. Connie claimed that the boy was not a troublemaker at all, though her mom instincts told her that her developing hormones might have been a factor.
Although that somehow didn't worry her as much as the other child that Connie claimed to be hanging out with. Luz Noceda… the school delinquent that was constantly dragging her daughter into every kind of tomfoolery and shenanigan possible. Once was an accident, twice was a coincidence, three times was a danger to the school and should be given a restraining order slash expulsion.
However, she did have some respect for the girl's mother, Camilla Noceda. A Vet running her own clinic, not to mention being a single widow raising the girl. So she held off as long as she could, and hoped that the Camp would have fixed the problems… clearly it hadn't.
She walked inside with her husband and Connie, as she found the Nocedas with a group of six. A long purple haired girl in a black dress leaning close onto the young Luz, likely the date Camila mentioned her daughter bringing. A little unprecedented, given how she would've rather be kept within the family, but she wouldn't make a big stink out of it. She would learn if the girl was a bad influence soon enough.
Now came to the other five that Priyanka didn't recognize, who she assumed to be the Universe family. First off was presumably Mr. Universe. A balding man with a beard and long hair on the back of his head. The man clearly looked uncomfortable in a suit, so something told the doctor that he didn't go out that much.
Next was who she assumed to be Mrs. Universe she had no information on. Blocky hair, dark skin that almost seemed purple when looked at from a certain light, shades not meant for the setting they were dining at… but otherwise looked completely composed, if expressionless. She wasn't sure if that was a good sign or a bad sign, but it was a sign of confidence.
The rest were children, who oddly gave her a little bit of curiosity. A boy and a girl that looked oddly similar to each other, identical curly hair, skintone, eyes, ears, nose, the only difference seemed to be the shape of their heads, one more roundish and stocky, another more thin and 'square' like. Connie made no previous mention of the boy having a sister, let alone twin, so now even more questions were being asked in her head.
The last one was another girl. Tall, with reddish hair and a skintone that, almost like Mrs. Universe, seemed to be a completely different shade in the light, pink when she squinted. Was this another sister? She didn't have any particular resemblance to the others, aside maybe Mrs. universe. A cousin or niece on the mom's side perhaps?
Whatever the case, it was best to get the introduction out of the way. "Oh, Good evening, Dr. Mahaswarren. Mr. Mahaswarren. Connie. So good to see you, outside of a school office." Ms. Noceda greeted them formally.
"It is a change of pace." Her husband, Doug, nodded. "Hello there, it's nice to meet the parents of a boy my daughter is attached to." He extended his hand out to Mrs. Universe.
"Likewise." The woman said stoically, reaching out her own hand and shaking it, and by the expression her husband made, a lot firmer than he anticipated. "My name is…"
"Garnethementiua." The young girl butted in. "It's a name from her home country, but since it's super long people just call her Garnet. It's her favorite gem anyway." She nervously chuckled.
"Yes. This is my daughter, Vee." The woman smiled, ruffling the girl's head. "She's a big fan of my work."
"I see…and what is your work exactly?" She asked.
"I'm a bit of a … protector." The woman responded, almost sounding like she was deflecting.
"You don't say? I'm actually a security guard." Doug smiled. "Right now, I'm on the lookout, the police are in a panic when the driver from last week ran wild and got away."
"So crazy, so weird, hope they catch them—so you're the great and understanding parents that Connie loves to go on and on about." The boy said, bowing his head a little. "I'm….." The boy looked like he was pausing.
"My…our great son, Steven Universe." Mr. Universe ruffled the boy's head affectionately.
"..Yes, that." The boy continued. "And might I add that it is a pleasure to meet you two. Connie just goes on about how great and professional you are."
"And she tells me you're a kind soul with no thoughts of violence." She replied.
"Nope, not a single one. I'm just sitting on the beach and playing music most of the time—"
"I taught him everything he knows." Mr. Universe chimed in again.
"Though I am mostly self taught—"
"I got him started." The boy paused again, likely getting frustrated at the man for interrupting him.
"And… I don't believe Connie's told us about these two." She gestured to the girls with purple and reddish hair.
"Sorry, we didn't mean to inconvenience you in any way, we just wanted to support our partners the best way we could." The girl with purple hair bowed. "I am Amity Blight, Luz's girlfriend."
"And I'm Boscha, Steven's girlfriend." The pink skinned girl held said boy's hand.
A date? That, strangely enough, almost ruled out hormones being an issue with Connie's perception. "No inconvenience, I just didn't want to assume. Shall we sit down?" Priyanka asked.
"Of course, let's eat." Camila gestured to their table as they sat down.
"Oh, allow me." Mr. Universe pulled out a seat for the Vet.
"Oh…ah…thank you…Greg." Camila stuttered a little.
"No problem." The man nodded as he sat down, not even bothering to pull out who was supposed to be his own wife's seat. That was pretty peculiar, if not just downright rude.
"..." Garnet simply moved to his side, taking a seat without raising a voice. Was she used to this? A womanizer as a husband?
"For the love of.." Luz grumbled something as Amity rubbed the girl's hands, seemingly calming her down. "So..Dr. Mahaswarren…still in the….doctoring business?"
"If you're asking if I'm still a doctor that treats up to a dozen patients a day from check ups to surgeries, then yes." She answered curtly. "And what do you work in, Mr Universe?"
"Oh I've dabbled in business here and there, had some sound investments.."
"He runs the car wash." Mrs. Universe answered.
"A car wash.." Doug nodded. They weren't ones to judge people on their careers, but given the picture, it seemed rather…unambitious.
"Well, I tried a music career … sadly, did not make the best investment in managers." They winced. "But, as long as I have a stable job, I'll live. My son already has a part time job of his own actually."
"Oh really?" That was a positive sign in the boy's favor.
"Not really a part time job as much as I run my own business." He answered. "Me and my sister Vee here create what people like to call 'modern art'. Basically we create statues and models from old scraps and antiques that people love enough to pay for."
"It really helps stretch out my imagination." Vee smiled widely. "I spend time with my brother, and any art we don't sell we keep for ourselves and improve."
"They're really great at it." Connie answered with a smile, turning to the girl with a blush. "Vee especially. She's always coming up with so many amazing ideas."
That smile….was her daughter….no…but…Connie did never mention Vee before. "Are you two close?" Pyriyanka asked.
"Oh, um, you know, we've hung out whenever she hangs out with Steven." The girl gave a nervous smile. "He's usually the instigator in most of our activities."
"Heavily supervised by Garnet, obviously." Amity added.
"..You call Mrs. Universe by her first name?" Doug asked.
"I prefer it. No need for too much formality in my own home." She responded. "I still use formality, but not with people I've gotten close to."
"She's pretty chill, so we always feel safe and protected when she's around." Vee smiled.
"Of course, me and Steven are very closely bonded. Most days it's just the two of us, driving out on the road and enjoying everything life has to give us. Two proud universe men riding the road together." Mr. Universe said proudly.
"And Vee …" The boy said, his hand opening and closing as she could see faint traces of pink.
"Greetings!" She looked and saw a young adult walk to their table with a paper and pen. "May I take your orders?" Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Boscha holding onto Steven's hand.
"Yes, that would be greatly appreciated." Camila spoke up. Something wasn't adding up here. It wasn't that what they were saying wasn't unbelievable…but there was just something a bit…off about the situation.
========================================================================
Greg was overjoyed. When his son told him he needed him, he couldn't have joined in fast enough! His son was coming to him for help! It was everything a parent wanted out of their child! Sure, it was to help that fake snake steven impress a couple of people, and he had to pretend Garnet was his wife, but other than that, the situation was perfect!
Even more so, Camila was here. This was his chance to make everything in his life go right for once in one fell swoop. He would show her that he still had worth, that was a good man to keep around, that he wasn't some drunk burden she needed to ditch.
"So, how are the children's grades?" The woman he was supposed to impress asked. "I've never seen them around school whenever called."
"We're home schooled actually." The snake responded. "Garnet travels the world a lot, so she keeps up to date on lots of topics and subjects."
"I see, so you spend a lot of time with your father then." Mr. Mahaswarren observed.
"Oh..I ah, yeah, but it's..mostly me and Lucci hanging out. We take turns teaching each other about the world."
"Lucci?" Mrs Mahaswarren asked, the group pausing for a minute.
"Nickname that Boscha gave to Steven." The glasses girl interjected. "Isn't that right ?"
"Of course. I have several nicknames for my little crystal, isn't that right?" His son's girlfriend scratched his chin.
"Yes, my lovely angel." Steven gave a dopey smile, pecking the girl on the cheek. Reminded him of his younger days with Rose.
"Isn't it a little too public for that level of intimacy?" Dr. Mahaswarren asked.
"As long as they don't take it too far, I believe some level of pda is allowed." Camila brought up. "I've made sure to give Luz and Amity a thorough discussion regarding such matters."
"Mooom!" Camila's daughter complained. "We've just been holding hands around the house."
"And it's going to stay that way for as long as I can help it."
"It's fine Luz, everyone has to follow that rule." He said, leaning in closer to Camila.
"Ah.." Why was everyone staring at him like that?
"And here's your entres." A plate was shoved in between them and onto the table by what looked like the short black kid who hung around Steven, but older and with a mustache. "And drinks for everyone."
"Oh thank Titan." Luz sighed in relief as their plates were passed around.
"Wow. I never had food this fancy before." The snake said with wide eyes. "How rich are you guys?"
"We're not. We just moderate our finances really well." Mr. Mahaswarren answered. "We can afford to go out on occasion, so we save it for special circumstances.
Greg watched as Camila took a bite of her own. He was about to ask if they could try feeding each other, before a fork was shoved into his mouth. "It tastes amazing, doesn't it … darling ?" The gem bitch responded with a smirk.
"Mhmemenem…" He tried to get it out.
"Don't talk with your mouth full, dad ." Steven said, rolling his eyes as he fed his date. "We're guests at a fancy place."
"So Camila.." Dr. Mahaswarren began as he tried to chew. "It's come to my attention that your daughter and mine are spending an extended period of time together outside of school."
"Yes, they are." The woman smiled. "I'm glad that they're putting their past differences behind them and becoming closer friends."
"Yes…friends." The doctor cleared her throat. "I just want to make sure there's no rough housing or dangerous tomfoolery. The fight at the school was quite frankly, an embarrassment."
"Hey, are you trying to accuse her of something?" Greg accused her.
"I do when I have to treat their victims." The woman sighed. "At this point I just own a case full of antivenom at all times in the trunk of my car, along with a defibrillator. Not to mention you could have caused brain damage on that girl if your rulers hit her any harder."
"Good riddance." The purple girl muttered.
"What was that?" The Dr glared. "Are you saying it would've been better if an innocent girl was left critically damaged?"
"Innocent? That girl was constantly ripping into Luz over every little thing." Amity countered. "If you ask me, that was karma playing out its course."
"How about we move on?" Luz said nervously. "Me and Connie have been studying history lately, particularly the Wittabane brothers."
"If this is the company you keep, I'm hesitant about allowing that as well." The doctor muttered.
"Excuse me?" This time Camila glared. "I thought this was about getting together, not casting judgment on our children."
"Your daughter's date practically wished for another living being to be critically injured, that's behavior that needs to be called out." The doctor countered. "Not to mention they were using real swords according to Garnet. What kind of decent parent lets a child be around a weapon?"
"The kind that closely watches and protects them, and is not the nosy helicopter mom." Garnet growled.
"According to earlier, you're barely around due to your supposed 'job'." Doug brought up. "Which can only mean your husband is the responsible one here."
"It's fine, it's nothing to get angry about." He reassured them. "Watching over Steven is a piece of cake."
"You mean Steven and Vee, right?" The doctor asked.
Greg scratched his head in genuine confusion. "Who?"
Crack
They turned to see Steven clutching a broken glass of water, his hand pink, furry, and covered in shards. "Oh, my bad, let me go to the bathroom and clean up this juice." The kid said, standing up and speed walking away.
"I'll help clean up." A waiter that looked like the other glasses girl ran up and began whipping the area with a rag.
"You know this steak is pretty good, why don't we start digging in…" The snake began cutting into it.
"Mr. Universe, I didn't want to make accusations, but do you genuinely not know your own daughter's name?" The doctor accused him.
Right, the lie … "Of course I know it. The nickname was a new thing so it keeps slipping my mind." Greg nervously chuckled. "It's actually … Verossica." He said, thinking of the first name that popped in his head
"Verossica, as in that raunchy pop singer that specifically sings about… adult topics… and is on the list for top ten singers that children should never listen to?" Mr. Mahaswarren questioned.
"... She was named before the singer popped up?"
"How convincing." His son's girlfriend rolled her eyes.
"Sorry about that." Steven chuckled as he came back, now wearing gloves. "I guess they don't make glass like they used to."
"Yeah; super fragile glass." Luz chuckled as they looked at a non-existent watch. "You know what, it's getting pretty late, is anyone else getting tired yet?
"They haven't even brought the main course yet." Mr Mahswarren brought up. "We've just been snacking on bread and caviar."
"You mean this meaty tasting pudding?" His son took a bite of the fish eggs. "Ooh, soft and smokey."
"A little bitter, but surprisingly sweet." The snake took a bite as well.
"Your stomachs must be made out of iron." Camila laughed. "My palette isn't so refined."
"That's alright Camila, it's my first time trying this fancy food too." He reassured, getting his hand close to hers-
Grip
Which was instantly grabbed by the gem bitch. "Would you mind giving me a bite then, Honey?"
"Sure thing… sweetie.." Why was he doing all this work? The only people he needed to impress were Camila and Steven. He shouldn't have to keep up this charade for the sake of some weird alien snake demon that ruined his life.
"Here's the main course, sorry it took so long." The weird waiters moved around, the one with glasses giving pats on the back to Steven, who looked downright fidgety.
"Ooh lobster, super fancy." Luz said, cutting them off. "Let's dig in and end this night quickly."
"Is it any good?" Boscha asked, taking a bite … before gaining sparkly eyes. "This is heavenly …" So she never had shellfish, did she?
"Lobster; once upon a time ago I thought I would be eating this stuff all the time when I was on the road." Greg laughed. "Then I met Rose and learned to find comfort in the everyday hotdog."
"Rose?" The sound of facepalms were echoed across the table as Dr. Mahaswarren asked.
"My … first love. You know that's like right? The first is always the most memorable?" He asked.
"I know that far too well." Camila nodded. "They always hold a special place in your heart."
"They do…" He scouted closer to her. "But that doesn't mean it isn't open to more-
Stomp
"Owwwww!" He fell out of his chair as he held his leg. It was like someone threw a brick at it!
"Watch your step, dad." Steven told him, his eyes becoming vaguely diamond shaped.
"How did you ever settle down with a man so … repulsive?" Dr Mahaswarren asked the gem bitch, sounding appalled.
"We're currently…not together." Garnet said after a minute of pausing. "I'm sorry, Vee wanted you to get the best impression of us."
"So you lied to us about them being a stable family." The mother asked her daughter.
"Mom, it's not like that.."
"Then tell me the truth." She glared.
"The truth …" Everyone turned to Steven's growling voice … who had horns on his head. "You want the whole truth … nothing but the twisted, demented, horrible fucking truth, don't you?" He asked, his body radiating so much pink it was almost glowing.
"Steven, what's going on son.." He reached out for him, only to be gripped by the throat as his son grabbed him with a furry, hairy claw.
"Willow, Amity, grab the adults!" The Gem shouted, instantly snatching the snake and moving back.
========================================================================
Connie had heard generalizations from Luz. Lucci's powers were tied to his emotions. The more unstable the later, the more unstable the former. However, hearing about it, and watching it in action were two entirely different things, given the pressure the kid was radiating.
"I gave you a chance, I gave you one fucking chance to not fuck things up and you couldn't help but be a deplorable slime ball! Not just to Luz's mom, but to Vee! The fucking kid that you raised!
"What the heck is going on here!" Mom shouted.
"Oh, Doctor, you're gonna get a kick out of this tale." He spoke with a chuckle. "You see, the sperm donor over here has the big honor of losing me in the forest as a kid, along with the lady over there when they lost me in a crash. " Lucci threw the man on the ground. "Cold and alone, I was picked up by a witch who took me to another world, and treated with more care than ANY human here is willing to give, barring LUZ!" He stomped the ground, creating a crater that shook the building.
"I … what?"
"So there's no Steven, everyone is panicking … until Vee, the sweetest and most pacifistic girl here, decided to shapeshift into my place. And it worked out GREAT!" He shouted loudly.
"Lucci, you've said your piece." Gus said, still wearing the mustache. "Let's take it down a notch."
" Take it down…that's what I've been doing the entire time I've lived here!" The boy cackled more. "Everyone keeps telling me to stay calm, that I'm blowing it out of proportion, that I shouldn't get so angry…and maybe they're right.." He gazed down at the man hatefully. " But when this bastard comes in, demanding a parental relationship that isn't there, claiming how happy I am, ignoring my REAL mom and everything she's done for me, I'm sorry, but I'm going to lose it!"
At that last shout, the walls of the restaurant began to crack and crumble around them, only shielded by the vines Willow used to clear away the falling rocks from the ceiling. "Lucci, wait.." Luz shouted.
"You can't tell me you don't want this scum of the earth gone, Luz! You're not that good of a liar!" He shouted. "This whole time he's been making your mom uncomfortable, and he keeps doing it again and again, and he isn't even sorry!"
"I'm not trying to do that, I'm trying to sympa-" The man tried to speak.
"SHUT UP!!"The scream nearly burst the eardrums of everyone present. "You know what, we've done this the Earth Way, let's do this the right way, just like at home!" He threw the man down, and went to grab a table
"Steven, just calm down…!" Mr universe gasped out.
"MY NAME IS NOT STEVEN UNIVERSE !" Lucci lifted the table above him. " I AM THE SON OF THE OWL LADY! My name…is LUCIFER CLAWTHORNE!"
"Lucci no!" Vee grabbed him from the back. "He's not worth the jail time, he's not worth it!"
"I am going to end this scumbag before he's a problem in the future, because he clearly can't change!" He shouted, throwing Vee off him as he tried once more to crack open the man's skull.
"Lucci, before you do anything, just give me a second!" Luz ran in front of him.
"... Go on …"
"Months before this, I was in the same position as you! Bismuth killed Centi, and you know what I wanted to do with her gem!" The girl cried out. "You held me back! You knew I would regret it! So now I'm here to hold you back!"
"But.."
"I hate Bismuth with every fiber of my being, and I'll never, ever accept her as a good person, alive or dead! But killing her wouldn't have made my life better, it would've made it worse! I would've lost all hope for anything…so let me do the same for you! This doesn't just affect you, it affects Vee!" Luz pleaded. "Please…don't ruin everything over this man, he's not worth it!"
There was a tense silence for a moment, as the world seemed very quiet, merely Luz in front of the rampaging kid. "... Graa!" He threw the table away. "You live because of her, do you understand that!?"
"Un..un…understood.." Mr. Universe gasped.
" Good." Lucci threw the man to the side, walking away in a huff. "Come on Boscha, I need some air."
"Coming Crystal." The girl adjusted her hair and hooked arms with the boy. "Let's try to find more seafood. I never realized there was so much I was missing out on living in a world without Boiling water."
Garnet instantly looked over Vee the moment they were gone. "Are you hurt?"
"Not at all. I've been knocked down harder before." Vee dusted herself off. "How come nobody else tried pinning him down?"
"At that point it felt completely justified." Amity shrugged. "No offense Luz, your speech was great and inspiring."
"Thanks….I don't know if that actually matters now." She gestured to the broken tables, shattered glass, and the absolute bafflement of Connie's parents. "So….crazy special effects…right guys?"
"Special … effects …" Mom looked both aghast and furious simultaneously, and a bit frightened mixed within. "What in the blazing hell is wrong with you children!?"
… Well, if she couldn't hang around Vee before, she could never do it now.
========================================================================
Camila was having trouble digesting what had just happened. She had agreed to this on the basis that Luz and Connie did seem to be genuinely getting along, and the more they got along with the Mahaswarren's, the better.
However, what was unexpected: and frankly unwanted, was Greg and his…advances. Even disregarding the story they had to keep, Greg was just genuinely unpleasant to be around the entire time. Not only getting on her nerves, but on Lucci's and being downright neglectful towards Vee.
And then Lucci proved his need of therapy by nearly bringing down this entire place and trying to murder the man in cold blood, only calmed down by her daughter admitting there was someone SHE wanted dead.
The whole situation was messed up; and Camila's first instinct was to panic, to reflect on her choices and wonder where she had gone wrong..but then took a minute to remember what Dr. Waybright had said.
While what Luz had just announced disturbed her…thinking over her words and the context..Lucci talked her out of a bad decision; and Luz right now was doing the same. Given the situation, Luz demonstrated emotional wisdom and deescalated a situation for once. That was a positive. Underneath the mess that was tonight; Camila did indeed see a sign of maturity in her daughter.
"Connie!" Priyanka shouted. "You've done nothing but lie to us since day one! You've been hanging around these … lunatics !" The children looked at each other, before shrugging in acceptance. The children didn't argue…but the circumstances were honestly just too big. Normal thinking and reasoning was hard to apply to the situation, and while she didn't approve of everything…these children went the light a lot..they deserved better than this blind accusation and anger.
"But mom..!"
"No buts!" She shouted, grabbing the girl. "We are going home and discussing what happens after school from now on. As for the rest of you, I hope you feel ashamed of what has happened to-"
Ashamed
Ashamed
Like how everyone wanted Camila to feel as a kid..to feel ashamed of her interest..to feel bad for liking what she liked…what Luz went through everyday… that ended now .
"Zip it, Doctor!" Camila cut the woman off. "You don't know these children, you don't know what they've been through, the struggles they've faced together. I will not stand here and watch you criticize them for circumstances out of their control!"
The woman blinked in place. "Camila, because of you I haven't taken action against your daughter, but to defend this brand of lunacy is-"
"I am not defending them for their extreme actions, but I am defending from you criticizing their character as people!" Camila reiterated. "To call them out as bad people over one night is quite frankly very ignorant of you, and unfair to both your own daughter and Vee, who has been nothing but kind and sweet the entire night.
"And a liar-"
"Because she was afraid you would judge her friend for not having a traditional family! Maybe you should start looking inwardly and figuring out why she was so afraid!" Camila kept going. "Lying is one thing, and they should have been honest from the start, but a child should never, ever be afraid to tell their parents something." Some Camila herself was trying to work at.
"Back. Me. Up." The woman said to her husband with a look of rage.
They looked around for a moment, before he silently walked over to the sweating Vee, looking down at her while Garnet stood ready to push him away. "So, you're a shape shifting girl, correct?"
"Yes …" She said nervously.
"And you chose to remain as such?"
"... Yes?" Vee responded, still nervous.
The man continued to stare at her, before letting out a bright smile. "I never have to worry about grand kids!" He hugged the young girl. "Welcome to the family!"
"DOUGLAS/DAD!!" The two Mahaswarren shouted at the top of their lungs. Both their faces red, but for entirely different reasons.
"Honey, we just saw a child grow horns and fur and crumbled most of this place with just his voice. We are clearly beyond normal reasoning right now, so we can't approach this like we normally could." He turned back to Vee. "You promise to be honest from here on out?"
"One hundred percent." Vee answered.
"And you don't plan on enacting some sort of bloody revenge on anybody?"
"Wouldn't hurt a fly."
"Then I suppose we can try this again…on a later date…with you and your…mom…was that part true?" Mr. Mahaswarren asked.
"Yes. Vee is my daughter, and I am her proud mother." Garnet hugged the girl close.
"Then we'll have to schedule another time to discuss everything together…away from this mess…no offense Camila."
"None taken, I'm still getting a grasp on it myself. Speaking of messes" She turned her head to see the recovering Greg standing up. "You have a lot of nerve doing what you did tonight, Mr. Universe."
"What did I do?" He asked. "I did my best to keep up the charade like you guys asked."
"In the most unhelpful way possible!" Luz shouted. "You ignored Vee, couldn't hold back your hatred for Garnet, egged Lucci when he was clearly uncomfortable, and you kept hitting on my mom!"
"I was just keeping up the lie, how was THAT making him uncomfortable?" He asked.
"You're not even…I can't…" Camila rubbed her forehead. "Greg, it's time for you to go."
He groaned. "Fine, your place or mine?"
"No Greg … you go, away. Don't come near my house, and don't come near the kids." Camila said firmly.
"I'm not staying away from Steven-"
"Open your eyes man!" Willow shouted. "Lucci is not looking for a dad! It's not your choice to be his dad! He just started to give you some leeway and you messed it up!"
"You lost your right, it's over. Stay away or face the consequences." Amity sighed. "Come on, lets-"
There was some coughing from a man in a red suit, who walked up to the group. "The bill for the damages." He handed Camila a slip of paper. "And a broom for you three to start cleaning with." He handed the object to Gus.
"Sorry mom." Luz pouted.
"It's alright Mija, I'm not upset…not too much at least." She reassured her. "You actually prevented the situation from being far worse. I'm proud of you Luz." She hugged her.
"Mom.." Her daughter sniffed.
"However, All your friends will be required to take therapy, starting tomorrow." They all stared at Camila … before Hunter and Willow bolted to the window, grabbing sticks from their clothes and flying off into the distance.
"Uh…"
"It's not a punishment. If Lucci's anger has swelled up to this level, I can't imagine the emotional pain the rest of you have gone through." Camila explained. "I know coming to this world isn't the easiest adjustment, so I want you all to be able to process that all in the healthiest way possible."
"Yes Ms Noceda." Amity and Gus bowed.
"Good … now let's go home … tonight's been exhausting." She sighed. "Was it like that for you all the time in the demon realm?"
"More or less, but I had a nice comfy nest to sleep in by the end of the day." Luz said … Luckily they had beds now, so hopefully that would make things easier.