Kazuya was floating in the void.
No light. No sound. No sense of time.
Just… softness. Warmth. Comfort.
TOO MUCH COMFORT.
His mind was melting like butter on a hot pan.
He had to escape.
Somehow.
Some way.
But every time he tried to move, a gentle hand stroked his hair, and his willpower evaporated.
"This… this is a MILF trap…"
Suddenly—
A faint whisper echoed through the void.
"Yo, babe, wake the hell up."
A second whisper.
"Bro, if you don't wake up, you're gonna become part of the MILF ecosystem."
A third whisper.
"Fascinating. His brainwaves are synchronized with the maternal energy field."
Voices. He knew those voices.
With the strength of a thousand protagonists who refused to stay dead, Kazuya forced his eyes open.
Reality Slapped Him in the Face.
He was still in Lady Ravynne's lap.
Sylvara, Bradimus, and Celestia were leaning over him, their faces full of horror.
Sylvara shook him. "Babe, listen to me! You've been trapped in MILF Limbo for five whole minutes!"
Bradimus wiped a tear. "It felt like five years."
Celestia adjusted her glasses. "Your heartbeat slowed to a dangerously cozy rhythm. Any longer, and you would've become one with the lap pillow."
Kazuya stared at them.
Then he turned his gaze up.
Lady Ravynne smiled down at him, still stroking his hair.
"You're awake."
Kazuya's soul almost left his body again.
"NO. NO MORE."
He lunged backward, rolling away from her lap like his life depended on it.
Because it did.
Sylvara tackled him.
"Babe, focus. We're still in enemy territory."
Bradimus grabbed his shoulders. "You need to recover, man. You were almost lap-pillowed into another dimension."
Celestia nodded. "We underestimated MILF combat techniques. This is a level of comfort we were not prepared for."
Lady Ravynne simply stood up gracefully.
"I see… you have passed the second trial."
Kazuya froze.
"…Passed?"
Lady Ravynne's golden eyes gleamed.
"The true test was to escape the lap pillow."
Sylvara gasped. "BRO. YOU ACTUALLY DID IT."
Bradimus's jaw dropped. "HOLY HELL, HE'S BUILT DIFFERENT."
Celestia furiously wrote in her notebook. "Subject Kazuya has resisted the Lap Pillow of No Return. Truly unprecedented."
Lady Ravynne clapped her hands together.
"Very well. The third and final trial begins now."
Everyone tensed.
Kazuya swallowed. "Oh god. What is it this time?"
Lady Ravynne smirked.
"The Trial of the Stealth Kiss."
Silence.
Kazuya's soul left his body again.
Sylvara choked. "I—WHAT."
Bradimus collapsed. "NOPE. THAT'S IT. GAME OVER."
Celestia pushed up her glasses. "Unbelievable. A direct MILF-to-protagonist combat scenario. This may be the final battle."
Lady Ravynne took one step forward.
Kazuya took one step back.
Lady Ravynne took another step forward.
Kazuya took another step back.
Lady Ravynne smiled.
"Don't run. Accept your fate."
Kazuya bolted.
TO BE CONTINUED…