"Kanade…"
"What's wrong?" Kanade Natsukawa asked, puzzled.
Eiriri just stared at him, her expression conflicted, as if something weighed heavily on her. For several long moments, she said nothing.
"Eiriri?"
"I'm hungry."
"Huh?" Kanade blinked, certain he'd misheard her. "Didn't you just eat—"
"That wasn't enough!" Eiriri pouted, interrupting him. "Do you think one little sandwich is enough? Idiot."
"You should know what I mean without me having to spell it out, dummy. Honestly, with how slow you are, you'd already be locked into the bad ending route if this were a gal game!"
"I'm not psychic, and I'm definitely not living inside your head," Kanade shot back, rolling his eyes. "And, by the way, this is reality. No save points, no branching choices."
If there were save points, Kanade mused, he'd go back in time and stop himself from making every dumb confession that led to the current awkwardness between him and some of the girls he knew.
"It's just an example, idiot," Eiriri huffed. She gave his side a playful poke, her tone turning slightly whiny. "Don't change the subject. Go buy me another sandwich already."
"What? I'm the one going?" Kanade looked genuinely surprised.
"Of course! Who else would I be asking?" Eiriri said matter-of-factly. She leaned back in her chair with a cheeky grin. "I'm too hungry to walk~"
"…"
Kanade was stunned. His proud, tsundere golden-haired friend was… pouting and acting spoiled?
Even more shocking, her tone reminded him of another infamous figure in his life—the shameless Utaha Kasumigaoka.
Seriously, do these two swap tips on how to boss people around? Kanade thought, but he still stood up obediently. On his way out, he grabbed the trash from their table.
Eiriri said nothing, simply watching as Kanade walked off. When his figure disappeared around the corner, the playful smile on her face gradually faded.
"…He always agrees so easily to things like this," she murmured to herself, her voice tinged with a faint bitterness.
On his way back to the table with the sandwich, Kanade stumbled upon the trio of friends he'd originally come to the cafeteria with.
"Would one of you care to explain what's going on here, my dear friends?" Kanade asked, a polite but slightly menacing smile on his face as he leaned over their table.
The three—Hachiman Hikigaya, Miyuki Shirogane, and Tsubasa Tanuma—were seated at a different table, enjoying their breakfast in a cozy corner.
Kanade felt a twinge of betrayal. He'd spent time worrying about how to explain the unexpected addition of Yukino and Eiriri, only to find his supposed friends had ditched him to form their own little club.
"Unbelievable," Kanade muttered, feigning outrage. "How could you all just leave me like that?"
He expected them to look even a little apologetic. Instead—
"Yes, yes, we're terrible people," Hachiman deadpanned, pushing a can of coffee across the table toward Kanade.
Kanade raised an eyebrow at the blatant bribery attempt. "…Sweet or bitter?"
"Sweet," Hachiman replied.
"Not even bitter? You really didn't try, did you?" Kanade scoffed.
"If you're not drinking it, hand it back. I'll save the money," Hachiman said with a shrug, reaching for the can.
"Nice try," Kanade said, quickly snatching it away. He took a swig, grimacing at the sweetness, but decided it was worth it to score a small victory over Hachiman.
"Now spill," Kanade demanded, glaring at them. "And don't even think about feeding me some nonsense like 'we got lost.' Even kindergarteners wouldn't believe that."
Hachiman clicked his tongue.
"Did you just click your tongue? Were you seriously about to say that?!" Kanade snapped, incredulous.
"It's your imagination," Hachiman replied smoothly, putting on his best poker face. "Actually, I was struck with a sudden, life-threatening case of 'I can't eat here syndrome.' It was an emergency, so I didn't have time to let you know."
Kanade stared at him, dumbfounded. "You're kidding, right?"
But Hachiman's mock-serious expression almost made him believe it—almost.
"You're impossible," Kanade muttered, pinching the bridge of his nose in exasperation. He turned to Miyuki and Tsubasa.
"Care to give me the real reason?"
Miyuki and Tsubasa hesitated, glancing at each other before reluctantly explaining the truth.
"Well… Hachiman suggested we give you some space since you seemed, uh, busy with those two girls," Miyuki admitted.
"Yeah, we didn't want to interrupt your… relationship-building time," Tsubasa added, a grin tugging at the corner of his mouth.
Kanade repeated their explanation flatly, his expression unreadable. "So, according to you, Hachiman decided I needed space to… talk things out with two girls at once."
Miyuki and Tsubasa nodded earnestly.
Kanade turned back to Hachiman, who was pretending to be deeply interested in his drink. "And what do you have to say for yourself?"
"Correction," Hachiman said, raising a finger. "I didn't say 'talk things out.' I said 'build relationships.'"
"That's the same thing!" Kanade exploded.
He turned back to Miyuki and Tsubasa, hoping for support. "And you two just went along with it?!"
"Honestly, Hachiman made a good point," Miyuki said with a shrug.
"Exactly. We didn't want to interfere," Tsubasa added. "Though I wouldn't have minded sticking around to see the president's legendary charm in action."
Kanade groaned, burying his face in his hands. "Legendary charm? You make it sound like I'm running some kind of dating sim campaign!"
Miyuki and Tsubasa exchanged amused glances but said nothing.
"Fine," Kanade relented with a sigh. "But let me make one thing clear—it was not what you're thinking. We just happened to run into each other, and we talked for a bit. That's all."
"Understood, Mr. President," Hachiman said, a smirk tugging at his lips. "Rest assured, I won't breathe a word of this. Especially not to Vice President Shinomiya. You can count on me."
Tsubasa chimed in, grinning. "Me too. Your secret's safe with us."
Kanade froze. "…What exactly do you think my 'secret' is? And what does this have to do with Kaguya?!"
The three only exchanged knowing looks, leaving Kanade to stew in his growing frustration.