After finally calming down, I let Eris know I'm ready. She raises a hand toward the counter and calls out, "Lilly, we're ready!"
"Coming!!!"
The waitress cheerfully responds while finishing up at another table before making her way over, weaving effortlessly between bustling customers.
Now that I finally get a proper look at her...
Oh. My. God.
She's adorable!
Lilly is a sheep-girl with short, fluffy blonde hair and a pair of large, curving sheep horns atop her head. She's dressed in a cute maid outfit complete with a frilly apron, a black-and-white dress, and thigh-high socks. I'm pretty sure medieval waitresses back on Earth didn't dress like this. This is one hundred percent the kind of outfit you'd find in a modern maid café in Japan.
Not that I'm complaining!
Lilly is absolutely precious, and the way she smiles is enough to melt my freaking heart. I almost want to order everything on the menu just to watch her happy little reactions.
"Alright, my order's already being prepared. What do you want, Felicia?" Eris asks.
I clear my throat, force myself to focus, and open the menu again. To make things easier, I point at each dish as I read it aloud.
"Can I have the medium-sized dinner combo for one, please? Green salad with lettuce, tomatoes, and cherry vinaigrette, a side of mashed potatoes with double cream, creamy mushroom soup, and five lamb skewers."
I finish with a proud smile.
That should be plenty for me.
When I look up again, however, both Lilly and Eris are staring at me. They even tilt their heads at almost the exact same angle, wearing identical expressions of confusion. A quick glance around the dining room reveals that a few nearby customers are looking over as well, curiosity written plainly across their faces.
Huh?
What?
Instinctively, I touch my face.
"I-Is there something on me?" I ask quietly, suddenly feeling self-conscious.
Eris smiles, though the amusement in her eyes only grows.
"No, nothing."
She pauses for a moment before asking, "But... are you sure you can eat all of that?"
I blink.
Eat... all of that? What does she mean?
But then, I suddenly realize...
Right!
How could I forget?
I'm a girl now!
My appetite probably isn't what it used to be. What if I can't finish everything? Worse yet, what if Eris thinks I'm some kind of glutton after ordering so much?
That's bad.
Very bad!
"T-Then... can I get the smaller combo instead?" I hurriedly say. "The same dishes, just less meat and mashed potatoes."
I love eating healthy, so I'm definitely keeping the salad. A balanced diet is important. Besides, if I don't eat enough vegetables, I might end up constipated... or suffer from diarrhea because of the lack of fiber.
And honestly, who would want constipation in a medieval fantasy world?
There are no modern toilets here, no water gun to spray my butthole, and for all I know, they might not even have toilet paper. Every trip to the bathroom sounds like pure suffering.
Lilly and Eris exchange another glance.
The confusion on their faces hasn't disappeared.
What is going on?
Before I can ask, Eris smiles at Lilly.
"Let's keep the normal combo. Double the meat."
"Alright!" Lilly chirps as she quickly jots it down in her notebook before bouncing happily toward the kitchen.
Wait.
What?
I turn toward Eris in complete confusion.
She's still smiling.
"Come on, Felicia. I know you're trying to be considerate because I'm paying, but you need to eat properly. Don't hold back, okay?"
"O-Oh!"
I nod automatically, even though my mind is still trying to figure out what just happened.
Maybe...
I was actually ordering too little instead of too much?
****
Less than twenty minutes later, my food arrives. Even during the busiest hour, the kitchen and service here are shockingly fast.
And holy crap!
It's huge!
The platter alone is nearly the size of the table. The green salad looks fresh and crisp, dotted with bright red tomatoes and coated in a glossy vinaigrette. The mashed potatoes are still steaming, rich, creamy, and topped with a generous pat of slowly melting butter. Beside them sits a bowl of mushroom soup, its fragrant aroma drifting gently into the air.
But the real showstopper is the skewers.
Not five.
Not six.
Ten whole, beautifully grilled lamb skewers are stacked onto the plate like a mountain of pure, meaty goodness. The meat glistens with sizzling juices, and the smoky aroma alone is enough to make my stomach growl.
Everything is super-sized.
Oh my god... I don't even know if I can finish all of this.
The smell alone is enough to make my mouth water. I practically start drooling as I stare at the feast before me.
Eris's food hasn't arrived yet, though.
I want to wait for her.
It's only polite, after all.
But unfortunately...
Bbbbbbbrrrrrrr!
My stomach has other ideas. It lets out a growl so loud it might as well be a battle cry.
Eris chuckles.
"You don't need to wait for me. Just dig in!"
I hesitate for a moment before picking up one of the skewers.
"T-Then... you can have some of mine while you wait! Here, try one."
"Hehe, sure!" Eris happily accepts it. "Thanks, Felicia."
"Hehe." I giggle. "You don't need to thank me. It's your money, after all."
"Oh, right." She laughs. "Anyway, eat before your food gets cold."
"Yeah!"
That was all the encouragement I needed. My hunger finally wins, and I eagerly dig into the meal.
****
But only a few bites later, something feels... off.
"...Huh? What's wrong?" Eris asks after noticing me slow down. There's also a weird smile on her face that feels very suspicious but I can't explain why.
"N-N-Nothing!" I hurriedly answer while chewing on my salad.
Nom.
Nom. Nom.
I don't understand...
This salad... why does it taste like this?
It's just lettuce, tomatoes, and a little vinaigrette.
So why is it so bitter?
Painfully bitter.
I almost spit it out, but somehow force myself to swallow.
I vaguely remember reading somewhere that the more bitter a vegetable is, the more antioxidants it contains.
So...
This is healthy, right?
...Right?
So, determined not to lose to a salad, I take another bite.
And I immediately regret it.
Swallowing the second mouthful is somehow even harder than the first.
Maybe the soup will be better?
I cautiously scoop up a spoonful and take a sip.
"Ugh!"
That same bitter taste hits me.
The mushrooms are tender enough, and the vegetables are cooked perfectly, but the broth itself still has a slight bitter note for some reason.
Thankfully, the meat more than makes up for it.
The lamb skewers are absolute perfection. Smoky, juicy, tender, and packed with flavor, they're everything I could have hoped for. The outside has just the right amount of char, while the inside practically melts in my mouth.
Before I even realize it, all nine remaining skewers have disappeared.
Yeah...
I probably looked like a complete glutton.
In my defense, I was starving.
Besides, the meat was just too good to resist.
Just then, Lilly stops by our table with her usual cheerful smile.
"Well, how is everything?"
"E-Everything is great! So tasty!" I answer with a slightly forced smile.
I don't have the heart to complain, especially after how quickly they prepared everything.
"I'm glad you like it!" Lilly says happily, her fluffy hair giving a little bounce.
Right then—
Ding!
A small bell rings from the kitchen.
"Oh! I think your food's ready!" Lilly says to Eris. "I'll be right back."
"Alright."
As Lilly heads toward the kitchen, I suddenly realize something.
I have no idea what Eris actually ordered.
She simply asked for her "usual," which means she must come here often enough that the staff already knows what she likes.
Now I'm curious.
What kind of food does Eris usually eat?
Before I can ask, however, something else catches my attention.
"Eris... where are your utensils?"
I glance at her side of the table.
It's completely empty.
No fork.
No knife.
Not even a spoon.
Eris leans back in her chair with a grin.
"Utensils? Nah. You don't need those for drumsticks."
"Ooooh! Drumsticks!"
That makes perfect sense!
So Eris likes chicken!
Well, she's a catgirl, so somehow that feels oddly fitting.
A moment later, Lilly returns carrying an enormous platter with both hands. She sets it down in front of Eris with a heavy thump, and even the sturdy wooden table gives a tiny creak beneath the weight.
My eyes immediately widen.
...AYO.
What the heck?!
Those aren't chicken drumsticks.
Those are dinosaur drumsticks!
Each one is bigger than my entire leg, their crispy golden skin glistening with juices and sprinkled with fragrant herbs. There are three of them.
Three!
I stare at the plate in stunned silence as my brain quietly shuts down.
Meanwhile, Eris simply cracks her knuckles with an eager grin, looking at the colossal meal like she's about to enjoy a light snack.