Naruto couldn't help a smile as he listened to Kiba talk about dogs. He didn't really like dogs that much, but Kiba was talking to him, unlike the other kids. They've been talking for the past few days, and it looked like he was slowly making a friend.
The fox–Kurama!–was right.
Kiba puffed out his chest, a smirk on his face. "Mom said I'll get my own nin-dog in a few years. We're gonna be the best partners. Everybody will be jealous."
Naruto's smile grew wider. He already had the best partner. He was going to become an amazing ninja with Kurama's help.
Ask him if he thought of a name for his dog.
Naruto blinked, trying to keep the surprise from showing on his face as Kurama spoke again in his head. The fox had been teaching him that ninshū thing for the past week, and when they did the fist bump a couple days ago, Kurama could talk like this.
He still wasn't used to it. He couldn't talk back to the fox yet, but Kurama said that it shouldn't take too long before he could. He just had to get better at ninshū.
"Did you think of a name for your dog?"
Kiba grinned. "Of course I did. I came up with the best name since a month ago. I'm going to name him Akamaru."
Naruto's brow scrunched up a little. Akamaru? Was Kiba's dog going to be red? He'd never seen a red dog before. Red was nice, but could dogs even be red? He scratched his head a little. Maybe it was a chakra thing?
"Hey, Kiba, you wanna play–"
"Oi, Kiba!"
Naruto tried not to frown as a loud voice interrupted him. Looking to the side, he saw a brown haired boy running towards them. Shinji…
"Come play tag with us." Stopping next to Kiba, Shinji pointed a thumb over his shoulder at three other boys gathered next to a tree. Naruto felt a twist in his tummy when he saw Daiki and Kenji among them.
Kiba scratched at his head, looking between Shinji and Naruto, face scrunching up as if pinched.
A cold feeling spread through Naruto's stomach, and he tried to get ready for what he knew was about to come. Kiba would go play with the other boys and leave him alone, just like everyone else.
Much to Naruto's surprise, though, Kiba looked at him with a smirk. "Wanna go play tag?"
For a moment, Naruto could only stare at Kiba wide eyed, the cold feeling in his chest slowly going away, replaced by something warm. He opened his mouth to say something, but Shinji just spoke over him.
"Why are you even talking to this guy? Nobody likes him."
Kiba crossed his arms with a frown. "I can talk with whoever I want."
Shinji frowned back. "Whatever. Wanna come or not?"
"Nah." Kiba shook his head. "I'm gonna look for Shino. I wanna see if he found any cool bugs."
"Bugs? Really?" Shinji made a face, shaking his head before running back to his group.
Kiba looked around, a grin forming on his face as he pointed at a tree in the distance. "Let's go check on Shino. We can play with him."
Despite the warm feeling in his chest, Naruto found himself hesitating as he looked at Kiba. "I haven't talked to Shino yet…"
"So?" Kiba cocked his head in confusion. "You can talk to him now. C'mon." The boy gestured with a hand before breaking into a run to the other side of the courtyard.
Naruto ran after the boy with a smile. Maybe this time things would be different.
A quiet sigh escaped Hiruzen as he skimmed through another budget report. Dealing with paperwork in his office was always tiring. At home, he could use a shadow clone or two, but in public, the Hokage always had to project an image of indomitable strength for all who may be watching, even if it meant powering through a mountain of papers.
His favorite blend should be enough to carry him through the day, and he could have a nice, relaxing tea once he retired in the evening. A warm brew always soothed his tired mind after long hours spent in the office.
The old age was finally catching up to him, but he still had a couple decades left in him. Hopefully, he could find a successor soon enough and enjoy his well earned retirement. He'd barely spent any time with his grandson lately. His son, too, once he returned from his tenure at the Fire Daimyō's court.
A frown crossed Hiruzen's face as an old memory surfaced to mind. They hadn't been on the greatest of terms when Asuma departed. He was even part of the reason why his son chose to leave in the first place.
Perhaps a few years away would do his son good and help him gather some much needed wisdom. He supposed that time would tell.
A fox masked ANBU suddenly flickered in his office, dropping to a knee, and Hiruzen set aside his papers on his desk.
"Lord Hokage, the recon mission in Grass was a success."
Hiruzen's eyes widened a fraction, mouth settling in a grim line. So it was true, after all.
"Report."
Fox began his recollection, listing everything that his team managed to find about the two Uzumaki survivors. By the end of the report, Hiruzen had a deep frown lining his face.
A woman and her daughter. The mother treated only slightly better than livestock, in exchange for a home and a living inside that village. An admirable resolve. Some parents were willing to sacrifice everything for their children.
He closed his eyes for a moment, and the image of two mangled corpses flashed in his mind.
His jaw tensed, a deep, quiet exhale leaving through his nose.
"You are dismissed."
The ANBU left in a body flicker, leaving behind a swirl of leaves that quickly vanished into wisps of smoke.
For a moment, Hiruzen just looked idly at the far wall, letting the stormy tides in his mind settle. The Leaf was truly a cut above the rest. Moments like these reminded him that his village was the most civilized among the others.
The others called them weak for holding such values, but they were still the strongest among the five. Even weak, and weakened still, none of their enemies dared to make the first move. The Cloud tried, and thought they got away with it, but the wheel always turned in the end.
Hiruzen fished out his pipe from his robes, lighting it up with a touch. He took a deep pull, savoring the bittersweet aroma for a moment before exhaling a hazy plume of smoke. He stood up from his chair, facing the tall windows overlooking his village, a frown curling his mouth.
Two Uzumaki. The embers of a great clan. They would be a boon for the village. The boy would get a family. The girl or the mother might have the same bloodline limit as Kushina.
The Nine Tails was being helpful, even if he seemed to take an odd pleasure in adding to his sleepless nights, but no one could tell what might happen in the future. That rogue Uchiha was still at large. Naruto would have to learn how to control the fox's chakra at some point. Tenzō wouldn't be able to suppress the Nine Tails by himself in case of a rampage.
But with the help of those chains…
Hiruzen took another puff from his pipe, gaze sweeping across the village once more time before turning around and making his way to the door.
Perhaps he could use a second opinion on this matter.
Naruto stood in front of my cage, all smiles and rainbows and sunshine while chattering about his day as I lazed around, sprawled on the floor, head resting on my haunches.
It's been two weeks since the brat started the Academy, and the past few days felt like I was playing some unholy blend of The Sims and Crusader Kings. I never thought that I'd spend my time helping a five year old befriend other five years olds, but then again, I never thought that I'd end up in this world without a penis, either.
Life had a funny way of getting you to open up to new experiences, I supposed. And, well, it wasn't like I had much else to do in here to pass the time, aside from watching Leaf Village TV and playing with my chakra.
I've been experimenting a little, and, while I managed to figure out how to light shit on fire, I still had a long way until I could roleplay as a dragon. The progress for other jutsu rip-off shenanigans was similarly slow. Replicating ninja magic sounded easy in theory, but without knowing the hand seals to get a feel of how the chakra was supposed to mold, it turned into a lot of trial and error work.
I never imagined that I'd regret not being enough of a Narutard, but come on, I didn't even know the hand seals to the fucking Transformation jutsu. Meanwhile, there was one guy in my AP chemistry class who knew all the seals for the Water Dragon jutsu.
The old memories in my noggin didn't come in clutch, either. Kurama hated ninjutsu the most among his siblings, and nearly all of his knowledge on the topic came from what he had witnessed during battle.
It sucked, but I still had plenty of time to figure things out. For now, I'd just stick to working on my fire bending.
"–and then Kiba put a huge beetle on his face and kept it there for a whole minute while making funny faces."
The brat concluded with a grin, hands on his hips as he looked at me expectantly. In moments like these, I kinda wished that I read a parenting book in my old life, even if ironically.
"It's good that you're starting to make some friends, but you should try to pay more attention in class, even if it's boring to you."
Naruto blinked, his smile making way for confusion. "Ehhh, but why? Can't you just help me like you've been doing?"
His whiny voice almost brought a frown to my face. I had to nip this in the bud before it became a problem. I didn't mind being a backseat teacher, but I wasn't going to do homework in his stead.
"Brat, if I keep giving you all the answers, you won't learn how to think for yourself. I can help you with difficult things, but critical thinking and problem solving are vital skills to a ninja. If you want to reach all the way up to that Hokage Rock, you'll have to build a strong foundation."
As expected, the brat just made a frowny face at my refusal, but he seemed to actually think about my words.
"What's critical thinking?"
I took a moment to figure an example, and, soon enough, my mouth twitched with a smirk.
"Do you think that painting funny faces on the Hokage Rock would make a good prank?"
Naruto blinked at the sudden change in topic, a grin suddenly pulling at his cheeks. "Hell yeah, it would! You like pranks, too, Kurama?"
A quiet sigh escaped me. "Yes, but that's beside the point right now." I held up a finger to forestall his excitement. "Consider this prank. How would you do it? What would you need to pull it off? Could you do it without being caught until done? What consequences would your prank have? Would they be worth the brief satisfaction of defacing a village monument?" I tapped at the ground with a claw, sending a few ripples through the water. "You ask yourself these kind of questions, carefully think about everything, and then decide how you wish to act. That's critical thinking."
Honestly, I expected that half of this would just fly over the brat's head, but the oddly intense look on his face took me aback a little.
"That sounds really complicated, but I think I sorta get it?"
Ah, right. Chakra did funny things to the brain in this world. And Naruto was pretty smart to begin with. If Kakashi and Itachi could philosophize at seven years old, then this brat shouldn't surprise me too much by being smarter than the average kid back home.
"Having an idea in mind is a good start. You'll understand more as you grow up."
Naruto nodded, face scrunching up in confusion. "But how's math and history gonna help with being a ninja?"
My mouth twitched with a suppressed smile. It seemed that math was a constant source of frustration for children, no matter the universe.
"Math is mostly useless, but a small part of it might help you throw weapons better one day, or maybe even help you in a mission. And you need to know history, so you can avoid making the same mistakes as your ancestors."
In an ideal world, at least. From what glimpses I had so far, most of the so-called shinobi history taught in the Academy was just Leaf nationalism with a dash of Senju glazing.
I'd bet the other villages had their own version of history, too.
What a joke.
A brief silence fell among us as the brat considered my advice. I didn't expect him to start liking academics or anything like that. I'd consider it a win if he just passed his exams. Mindset was the key, and it would make a world of difference compared to his canon counterpart. He could be an irreverent menace if he wanted, but I wasn't going to let him stay ignorant of so many things.
"The Academy is boring right now, isn't it?" My voice rumbled through the chamber, breaking the quiet. "I have a new idea for your ninja training."
Naruto looked up, big, blue eyes shining with excitement. "Really? What is it?"
"Another important skill that every ninja should possess. Information gathering."
The boy scratched at his head, forehead crinkling a little. "You mean, uhh, learning stuff about people and places?
"Yes. Or just looking for a specific thing."
"Like what?"
"A location of potential interest." My lips quirked with a smile. "For example, there's this old looking building somewhere around the edge of the village. You could spend an hour each day, trying to look for it."
His face fell a little as he listened to the objective. I had a feeling that he was going to hate most D-rank missions with a passion.
"An old building? I thought it was something cooler."
My smile stretched further. "There's something special about that old building. It has the Uzumaki swirl at the front."
And just like that, his interest returned tenfold. A burning curiosity shone in his eyes as Naruto stared at me, wide-eyed.
"Is it related to my mom?"
"In a way. Her clan built it here a long time ago to store something, and people forgot about it."
"Store what?" Some of the enthusiasm bled out of his voice as a frown made its way on his face. "And why did they forget about it?"
"Perhaps only few people knew about it and they died. I'll tell you what's inside when you find it. Consider that your reward for completing a mission like a real ninja."
Naruto was bored.
He shifted in his seat, propping his cheek on his hand while doodling on a page with the other. Mr. Umino was talking about something boring at the front of the class, something about shinobi history that made Naruto want to smack his head against the desk.
He didn't think the academy would be so boring. When were they going to start doing cool ninja stuff? It's been almost a month already, and all they did was language, history, maths, and physical exercise. The last one was alright, the fox kept telling him how ninjas needed the exercise to become super awesome, but the rest was boring.
Kurama said that history was supposed to be useful, but Naruto felt like he was about to fall asleep.
Setting his pencil down to scratch at his cheek, he dug the hand in his pocket, pulling out a small leaf.
Kurama said that awesome ninjas trained all the time, even if just small stuff. The fox taught him this cool trick where he could use chakra to stick small objects to his skin. He had to watch his chakra carefully all the time, so it was a little boring, but it was better than listening to what that tree guy did sixty years ago.
Pressing the leaf to his forehead, Naruto focused his chakra in one point until the leaf stuck to his face. Smiling, he picked up his pencil, but found it a little hard to focus on his chakra and doodling at the same time.
With a frown, he stared at his paper while focusing on his chakra and the leaf. Maybe if he practiced long enough, he could do both at once? That sounded like something a cool ninja should be able to do.
Maybe this was the next step for the leaf exercise?
A movement in the seat to his right made Naruto look up from his desk, only to come face to face with Kiba. The boy was making a funny face, staring at him like he just did something weird. And he wasn't the only one.
Glancing around, he saw a few other kids giving him weird looks.
"Hey, Shinji, what's that freak doing?"
Naruto looked away, ignoring the whispered comment and the sting in his chest that it brought.
"He just put a leaf on his forehead, what's the big deal?"
Mr. Umino suddenly turned around from the blackboard, and Naruto almost dropped the leaf as he met his eyes with a weak smile, hoping to not get scolded again for not paying attention. Much to his relief, the man turned back to the board, but it was short lived as Iruka paused halfway, looking at him again, his eyebrows shooting up his forehead.
Ah, crap, he was really getting scolded, wasn't he–
But Mr. Umino didn't say anything. He just kept staring at him weirdly like almost everyone else in the classroom.
–eh?
Naruto's face scrunched up, and he focused back on the leaf when he almost dropped it again. Why was everyone giving him these funny looks? Didn't they know this stuff, too? Kurama said that sticking a leaf to the forehead was the easiest chakra control exercise, and all ninjas knew how to do it.
Maybe Mr. Umino was surprised that he could keep the leaf stuck on his face for so long without getting tired? Kurama said that other kids his age would struggle with this exercise after a few minutes, because they didn't have enough chakra.
But why was everyone else acting so surprised? Did nobody tell them about the leaf exercise yet? They were gonna fail at being ninjas at this rate.
Naruto nibbled at his lip, scratching his head a little. Maybe Kurama knew something about this? But why was he being quiet? Was he sleeping?
Heh. Look at their faces.
Ah, there he was!
I'm saving this memory for posterity.
Posterity? What's tha–
"Naruto… do you know what you're doing right now?"
Mr. Umino's voice drew Naruto's attention back to the blackboard, and his face creased in confusion. "Sticking a leaf to my face?"
Really, why was everyone acting so weird about this?
Some of the kids laughed, but he didn't pay much attention to them. He still had to focus on his leaf.
Even the half asleep Shikamaru, head on his desk, had an eye cracked open, watching him curiously.
Sakura, the girl with the nice, pink hair from two seats across was also looking at him strangely. She also gave him this sort of look a few days ago when he'd answered that complicated math question with Kurama's help, so maybe she was being weird in a different way than the other kids?
Girls were pretty weird anyway, so Naruto wasn't sure.
"Where did you learn this?" The teacher spoke again, voice sounding a little worried. Worried because he might get too far ahead of his classmates?
Naruto looked back at the teacher, ready to tell everyone how great the fox was at teaching stuff, but the familiar voice speaking in his head gave him pause.
You heard some ninjas talk about it and figured it out on your own.
Eh? Why didn't Kurama want everyone to know how smart and awesome he was?
Most people would freak out if they knew we were talking like this. Just keep quiet about it for now and let the old monkey deal with it.
Naruto couldn't help a frown. That made sense, but he didn't like it. The fox was a lot nicer than people thought.
"I heard some ninjas talk about it and figured it out by myself."
The teacher blinked a couple times, brow scrunching up a little. "You… figured it out on your own?"
Mr. Umino made a face like he was having trouble understanding, which was super weird, because this was really simple. Naruto was just doing what everybody expected from a real ninja.
Grinning, he gave an enthusiastic nod. Kurama told him about the exercise, but he learned it by himself, just like every other great ninja had done.
"Naruto, you're doing the leaf exercise." Kiba whispered from next to him, wide eyed.
"Mm-hmm. Wanna do it with me? I have a spare leaf in my pocket."
He should keep more leaves on him. The next step of this exercise definitely involved sticking more leaves to his face. Kurama was probably expecting him to figure this on his own, and he did it in less than a week. The fox was going to praise him again for doing so good at his ninja training.
Kiba scratched at his head, looking a little unsure. "Uhh, maybe the next time?"
Huh. Maybe he didn't want the other kids to give him funny looks?
"Okay."
Naruto smiled and Kiba went quiet.
A few of his classmates kept looking at him weirdly, but he ignored them, focusing on his leaf, proud that he managed to keep it stuck to his forehead through all of this.
Mr. Umino eventually went back to his talk about history, but Naruto only listened to it with one ear while continuing his chakra exercise.
He was going to become an awesome ninja at this rate.
Hiruzen's gaze swept across the table before him, briefly locking eyes with each of the gathered clan heads, all of them showing varying degrees of curiosity. All the major clans had a seat at the council table.
The only one missing was his old friend.
Danzō would learn of this, sooner or later, but this type of endeavor would be better handled by ANBU. The Root had their use, but they had a poor record in missions that prioritized the human element. They'd rather abandon the mission than risk having The Leaf associated to other Root operations.
"To start this meeting, I have a question for all of you." Hiruzen leaned forward ever so slightly in his seat. "If another village managed to acquire members of your clan and keep them hidden for years, exploiting them for their own benefits, how would you respond?"
His question had the same effect as poking an anthill. Hiruzen folded his hands atop the table, waiting patiently.
"I'd like to say that no one is stupid enough to steal from us, but we've seen the mess with Cloud from two years ago." Tsume was the first to speak up, leaning back in her seat with a smirk, drawing a brief glance from the man seated across from her.
Hiashi's face gave away nothing, looking as if carved from stone. Hiruzen could see the lingering traces of resentment, though. Hiashi was hiding it well, but his eyes still told enough of a story.
The Hyūga Affair had soured relations between them, and two years were not enough for that wound to properly mend.
"The Hyūga have been insulted once." Hiashi's voice was like cold steel, yet his words were carefully measured. "We would not tolerate a repeat."
Judging by their commiserating looks, that sentiment seemed to echo in the others to varying degrees. Even Fugaku gave a curt, almost imperceptible nod from next to Hiashi.
Letting another Hyūga Affair go unpunished would no doubt have dire repercussions for The Leaf.
"This is a troubling scenario to consider." Inoichi looked from across the table with a frown. "Bloodline theft, the loss of clan secrets… it could easily lead to war."
If one of the major villages was involved? Most likely. With Grass, however, it would depend on whether Stone was willing to make a move. But knowing Ōnoki… they'd likely stay out of it.
"I prefer to think that an Uchiha would rather choose death than enslavement by the enemy, to use against their own clan." Fugaku spoke up calmly, face a stern mask and voice measured. "But in the case of such an event, those who dared would soon learn why the Uchiha have always been great warriors throughout the ages."
The man's choice of words earned him a few odd looks from Chōza and Inoichi, but Hiruzen did not expect anything less from him. He'd dealt with the Uchiha for long enough to know the extent of their pride.
"That's not a hypothetical question, is it Lord Third?" Shikaku's mild voice cut through the brief silence like a knife. Hiruzen met the man's narrow eyed look with a grim smile.
"I'm afraid not. A few days ago, an ANBU operative returned from a routine mission with an unexpected report." Hiruzen swept his gaze across the table. "For the past few years, the Grass Village has been hiding two Uzumaki from us. A mother and her young daughter. They've been treated rather poorly, to say the least."
The revelation earned him a few raised brows and wide eyed looks.
Hiruzen would rather have as few people as possible aware of the Nine Tails situation for the time being, but the brief, side-eyed look from Shikaku made it clear that the man wasn't entirely sold on that cover story.
"Uzumaki?" Chōza spoke up in confusion. "I thought Kushina was the last of them."
"Whirlpool's destruction has not been a single day's affair. Some of them have clearly slipped between the cracks." Shikaku leaned back in his seat, crossing his arms with a smirk. "I wouldn't be surprised if more of them were scattered across the continent."
"Grass?" Tsume snorted in disdain. "Those cowards and weaklings? No one would take them seriously even if we waltzed in, grabbed the Uzumaki, and left."
As crassly as she put it, she had a point. Hiruzen doubted any of the major villages would bat an eye at Grass if they ever complained about losing their Uzumaki. The Leaf and Sand were allies. Cloud and Mist were too far away to care. Stone would not make a move without a sufficiently tempting incentive.
"Regaining the Uzumaki Clan would be a great boon for our village. We could start rebuilding the strength we've lost with the fall of the Senju." Inoichi said, drawing a series of nods from nearly everyone at the table, even the ever stoic Shibi.
"If any of those two could use the Uzumaki binding chains, having them in the village would be vital, in case the Nine Tails ever becomes a problem again."
Fugaku's comment earned him a frown and disapproving look from Chōza and Inoichi, but Hiruzen had to agree with the man. Currently, they had no means to contain the Nine Tails in the catastrophic event of a seal failure. The Reaper Seal was an option, but a last resort one that would permanently cost the village the tailed beast and another Hokage.
"I see." Hiruzen glanced from one clan head to the next, a thoughtful frown curling his mouth. Most of them seemed in favor of a rescue operation, with the rest simply keeping their thoughts to themselves. His gaze lingered on Shikaku, meeting the scarred man's keen eyes. "How would you conduct a rescue operation for those two Uzumaki?"
"I suppose the most optimal course of action would be an ANBU retrieval. I'd advise a stealth specialized team for the job. One Hyūga and at least one genjutsu user."
Hiruzen nodded. He'd considered that scenario among the most likely to succeed with minimal backlash. Mouth pressing in a line, he gave a thoughtful hum. "Let's assume that Grass somehow connects it to us. How would you proceed from there?"
Shikaku frowned in thought, hands steepling atop the table. "Before that, I have a suggestion, Lord Third."
Hiruzen smiled thinly. "Go on."
He'd have a definite solution by the end of this council.
I sat lazily in my cage, head resting on my haunches as I listened to Naruto talk about his school day. Our ninshū link made this redundant, I could easily see through his eyes if I wanted, but he seemed to enjoy our evening chats, and I wasn't going to deny him this little joy.
"–And we finally managed to get that lazy guy, Shikamaru, to hang out with us, even if it was just watching clouds."
"If you're planning to watch clouds again, you could make it a game with everyone else to do the leaf exercise at the same time."
Naruto blinked, staring up at me with wide, blue eyes. "That's a great idea, Kurama!"
A smirk stretched my lips. "Training together with other people is a lot more fun than doing it alone. You can even turn it into a friendly competition. A great ninja should help his friends become strong like him, so they can help him in turn become even stronger."
The brat nodded like he'd just received a great piece of wisdom, a smile brightening his face. "We'll become the strongest ninjas in the village, believe it!"
A quiet chuckle escaped me. "You have plenty of time until graduation to show me how strong you can become."
Those Chūnin Exams were going to be a riot. It'll be glorious.
A beat of silence passed between us as Naruto seemed ready to bounce in place from excitement. It was enough to bring a tiny smile to my face. For all he could be annoying at times, whenever he was happy like this, his chakra really did feel warm like the sun. Karin was right.
My mood took a sudden dip, and I held back a frown at the reminder.
That shriveled mushroom had better be doing something about that poor girl and her mother, or we'd be having words. I'd give him another week or two.
The water rippled as I shifted in my spot, propping my head lazily with a hand. "You know, Naruto, I think you should try saving some money from that monthly stipend."
The brat followed me with his gaze, face scrunching up in confusion. "Why?"
"We'll have to buy a bamboo flute and a shamisen at some point."
Maybe an erhu, too, once we learned to play those two. It wouldn't be Naruto without a banger theme song. Sadly, this was real life, so we had to do it ourselves.
"Shamisen?" He scratched his head, looking even more confused.
"You probably saw one. It's a thing with metal strings that makes noise when you pull them."
I mimed playing a lute, drawing a smile from Naruto with how silly I must've looked. Good thing that nobody else could see me in here, or my street cred would just vanish.
"But why?"
"You need a hobby, Naruto."
"What's a hobby?"
It took a great deal of self control to hold back an exasperated sigh. I couldn't wait for this brat to grow up some more and stop playing twenty questions with me.
"It's an activity you do for pleasure."
His eyes lit up in understanding. "Oh, like eating ramen!"
My free hand inched closer to my face, only to stop abruptly in an aborted face-palm. "Eating ramen is not a hobby."
Naruto pointed an accusing finger in my direction. "But you just said it is."
I took a slow, deep breath. Sage help me, 'cause I needed strength.
"Alright, fine, you need a hobby unrelated to food."
"But why that noisy thing?"
"Because music is nice, and you can impress people with it." I lazily pointed a clawed finger through the cage. "You don't want to show people how cool you are?"
As usual, that easily did the trick, the brat puffing up like a little peacock. "Of course I do, ya know!" His loud, squeaky voice echoed through chamber with that silly verbal tic.
I still had no idea why it was a thing.
"Then you should learn to play the flute, at least. You can do really cool stuff with it."
Like the Naruto Main Theme. Or the Rising Fighting Spirit. We could use shadow clones to play that during the chūnin exams like a motherfucking orchestra. It would be so epic.
Hell, I could probably rizz up Tayuya with just a bamboo flute. And even if it didn't work, just seeing her reaction to sudden background music would be a peak moment.
"How much money do I need?"
Naruto dug a hand in his pocket, only to frown when he found nothing. Did he forget that physical items didn't carry over in here?
"No idea. We can check tomorrow."
It shouldn't be that hard to learn playing an instrument with three strings. If all else failed, Naruto could just convince the old monkey to find us a music teacher.
I stared down at the smirking man as he slowly approached my cage, his mane of long, white hair looking like a dead animal perched atop his head.
"I expected to see you a little sooner." My voice rumbled through the chamber as I lifted my head from its perch atop my forelimbs, all nine tails fanning out lazily at my back.
Whether he found my act even the slightest intimidating or not, Jiraiya merely cocked an eyebrow. "Oh? I know I'm popular with the ladies, but I didn't expect that to extend so far."
I knew he was a clown, but my eyes still narrowed at his playful jab. Slowly, I rose to my full height, tails swishing ominously as I leaned closer to the gate. "Don't confuse me for your toads, brat."
I expected to get a reaction from him, but the toad molester merely eyed me for a few moments before bursting in laughter.
"Who would've thought the Nine Tails had a sense of humor."
"Perhaps if you didn't keep us in cages like this, you would know more about us."
Mirth draining from his face, Jiraiya stared at the towering bars of the seal for a quiet moment, mouth twitching with the ghost of a frown. A beat of silence passed between us before he crossed his arms, looking up, a curious gleam in his eyes.
"What did you teach the kid to bring me in here? It felt quite similar to the Yamanaka jutsu."
"Ninshū."
"Ninshū?" He mused, gaze turning distant. "I haven't heard that word outside of ancient tales."
"I hope you didn't come here for history lessons. Go ask the old monkey if you're that curious." Talking about the past with one old man was enough. I didn't like repeating myself, either.
Jiraiya gave a thoughtful hum, fingers tapping idly against his arm. "That's fine. I'll leave the history to the old man, I'm more of an artist myself."
I barely held back a snort. Yeah, an artist like the average webnovel trash author. I could probably write better smut than him.
"Go on." I tapped a claw on the floor, sending large ripples across the water. "I know you want to ask me something."
"Straight to the point, eh?" A smirk tugged at his mouth. "I heard you've been talking to the kid for the past month. I never thought a tailed beast could be so chatty."
Jiraiya shook his head in amusement, and I let out a scoff. Did this clown truly expect me to tell him more than I told that shriveled mushroom?
"Being trapped inside a seal for nearly a century can get quite boring." My voice came out airy, almost flippant. "Especially when I'm not chained and impaled to a molten rock for every waking moment."
"Impaled?" The toad molester blinked, eyebrows inching up his forehead as his arms dropped at his side.
My lips peeled back, revealing a row of sharp, ivory fangs. "Oh? You didn't know?" A low, harsh chuckle escaped me. "My previous seals have not been as accommodating as this one.
Jiraiya's jaw worked silently for a moment, gaze sweeping briefly across the chamber, before his lips pursed. "Minato never told me about this."
A derisive sound escaped me. "Uzumaki women can be quite vicious. Or maybe that was just Mito. Can't say I've met many Uzumaki women to compare."
Jiraiya went quiet, his expression unreadable as he stared at me for a moment before crossing his arms. "Speaking of Uzumaki, I heard we might be soon welcoming a couple survivors."
The coward took the first chance to change the topic, but I instantly perked up at the news. Oh? Did that old monkey finally make a move? He'd better not fuck it up.
"If you're looking to learn how I knew, don't bother. You need not know the details."
Jiraiya waved that off with a lighthearted smile. "That's fine. I'm more curious about why you did it."
I smirked. "The brat could use a family."
I wasn't sure what sort of answer he'd expected, but it was definitely not this one. Too bad I couldn't take a picture of his face and frame it. I'd have to be satisfied with just the memory.
"That's surprisingly kind of you." His voice came out tentative, like he barely believed what he was saying.
"You sound like you expected a tailed beast to be capable of nothing but destruction."
Jiraiya took a moment to measure his words. "To be fair, your kind did not leave the best of impressions throughout the past."
I sat back on the floor, the atmosphere growing too heavy for posturing. Jiraiya eyed me curiously as I propped my cheek on my knuckles.
"I wonder whose fault that is."
The toad sage didn't take my jab too well, his gaze narrowing into a glare. "And what are we supposed to do? You are forces of nature, able to reshape the lands. There will always be people who fear you and those who wish to control you."
I met his frown with a wholly unimpressed look. For a man who supposedly pursued peace, he certainly liked to find excuses.
"We did not start any of this. We tried to live in harmony with you, humans, but you were too greedy. Your ancestors scorned us and ultimately enslaved us."
"I don't think I can apologize for my ancestors, but perhaps we've treated you a little too harshly."
I couldn't hold back a scoff. "Spare me the platitudes. I've heard enough of that from my previous jailers. If you wish to apologize, let your actions speak."
Jiraiya crossed his arms, eyes turning flinty. "I can't open this seal, if that's what you meant."
"That's fine." A wry smile pulled at my lips. "The brat has been a decent host so far. I think I'll stick with him for a while."
Once again, my words seemed to take the man by surprise, his eyes widening ever so slightly, before a grin broke on his face. "Well, Naruto seems like a special kid. It makes sense that even a grumpy tailed beast wouldn't mind staying with him."
His playful voice brought a spark of irritation to my chest. Did he think he was being clever hinting at that shriveled toad's prophecy? My lips took a vicious edge. Time to give this clown a taste of his own medicine.
"And in time, you will have your own disciple. That disciple will become a ninja who will bring about great change. Either great stability or great destruction, the likes of which this world has never seen before."
That instantly wiped the smile off Jiraiya's face, and for a long, awkward moment, he just stared at me, his jaw slack. "You know the prophecy?"
"Of course I do." With my cheek propped on my fist and smirk showing off my fangs, I must've radiated an inordinate amount of smug. "The Sage told us about his little chat with the chief toad. The child of prophecy was not The Fourth, but his son."
A sharp intake of air reached my ears, and I saw that Jiraiya had stepped closer to my cage.
"How can you be so certain? Twice, I thought I found the child of prophecy, and both times it turned out I was mistaken."
A chuckle escaped me, the sheer smugness bringing a frown to Jiraiya's face. "That's because you only know the first part of that prophecy." Gamamaru must have dreamt the second half before the first, but who cared about that.
Despite being annoyed at my antics, the toad molester was still hanging off my every word. I was on a roll here, and I wasn't planning to stop any time soon.
"Here is what you're missing." I brought up my other hand, pointing a clawed finger between the bars of my cage. "Far in the future, there will appear a mischievous, blue eyed boy who can name all nine tailed beasts and who will fight along them."
I barely managed to hold in a laugh at the surprise on Jiraiya's face, though I couldn't keep the smirk off my lips, no matter how hard I tried. This shit was way too funny.
"It would've been nice to know this a few years ago." A muscle jumped in Jiraiya's jaw, his eyes narrowing. What was he even getting angry at? Gamamaru, for being an ancient fossil and forgetting his own prophecies?
"That toad has been alive for a thousand years. I'm surprised he still remembers his own name."
Jiraiya mulled on my words as we kept at the staring contest for a few tense moments, before a drawn out sigh escaped him, shoulders slumping. His lips pursed, a curious gleam entering his eyes.
"Is that why you're playing so nice with the kid?"
"It's part of the reason."
When he saw I wasn't going to add anything else, he quirked an eyebrow. "And the other?"
I met his inquisitive look with a smirk. "Wouldn't you like to know. Maybe I'll tell you another time."
Jiraiya frowned but didn't push the matter any further. "So, did you have a reason for telling me all of this? Aside from trying to get under my skin, of course."
I shifted to a sitting position, hands resting on my legs. "I want to get the brat started on training with my chakra. His control should be good enough by now."
Jiraiya's brow creased deeply as he shook his head. "No. Too soon."
"One month," I said, a frown curling my lips. "That's all I'm willing to wait."
The toad sage fixed me with a gimlet eye, crossing his arms. "Why the rush? The kid's not even six yet."
Because genocidal aliens were coming, and I doubted we had any plot armor.
"I assume the old monkey told you the truth about that night?"
A somber look took over Jiraiya's face, before he gave a slow nod. "He did."
"Then you should know there is a threat looming in the shadows."
"You know that too, huh?" Jiraiya's gaze turned distant, lips pursing in thought. "You think something is brewing behind the scenes. Something big."
Good thing he seemed to already know about the Akatsuki by this point. He'd take my words much more seriously than the old monkey.
"Too many pieces have been lining up lately. I'm too old to believe in coincidences."
Jiraiya nodded, mouth pressing in a grim line. "And you want to prepare Naruto for the future and whatever threats it may bring."
Knowing the kind of clusterfuck awaiting us in a few decades, I couldn't take any chances. We needed to be strong enough to kill gods.
"That masked man is beyond dangerous. With The Fourth gone, there is no one who can contest him."
"Is he really that strong?"
A flash of satisfaction almost had me smiling. It took me a while, but he was finally taking me seriously.
"No, but he has a tricky space-time technique from his mangekyō. Intangibility and long range travel." That shit was so broken, Kishi had to nerf it towards the end. "He can hold it for five minutes at a time, and the only weakness is that he must become tangible when transporting himself or something else."
"And Minato could surpass that through sheer speed with his Flying Thunder God."
Bringing that blond quickshot back with the Edo Tensei would definitely ruin Obito's day, especially if I also used Rin for some good old emotional damage.
The only problem was that Edo Tensei would have to be perfected first, like in canon, and that was just begging assholes like Kabuto to create even more problems with it.
It just wasn't worth it in the end. We'd have to use some other ways to stack our deck.
A quiet sigh escaped me as I fixed the toad sage with a stony look. "Even then, that masked man could sacrifice his other Sharingan to cast Izanagi. We'd have to kill him twice, perhaps even thrice, just to be sure."
Because those pink eyes weren't hax enough already, and they needed a get out of jail free card, too. Fucking Uchiha wank…
"Izanagi?" Jiraiya's brow furrowed, curiosity tinging his voice, but I've had enough of talking about those accursed eyes.
"Ask the old monkey about it."
With how much Tobirama disliked the Uchiha clan, he should've told Sarutobi plenty about the Sharingan's less known tricks.
Jiraiya cocked an eyebrow, a smirk on his face. "What? Not feeling chatty anymore?"
And he was back to being annoying. My mouth curled with a frown. "Don't bother me with questions whose answers you could find elsewhere."
A chuckle escaped the toad molester. "That's more like the Nine Tails I remember."
I met the jab with a loud scoff, not deigning him with an answer. This guy wasn't that bad, I could certainly tolerate him, but there was a time for jokes and a time for being serious, and he seemed to have trouble with that part.
Or maybe I was just jealous that he could still lay down some pipe while I was stuck in horny jail.
A beat of silence passed between us before Jiraiya crossed his arms, a thoughtful look on his face. "Looks like the kid has a hard road ahead."
"He needs to be stronger than even the best genin by the time he graduates. Much stronger. Chūnin, at least."
Ideally, I wanted him to contend with jōnin on his own merits by then, but knowing the brat's temperament, I had to settle for something more realistic. I'd have a better time herding cats than trying to turn Naruto into a shinobi like Itachi or Kakashi.
"And you're planning to keep helping with that?" Jiraiya eyed me curiously, and part of me wondered if he was that worried about Naruto, or if Sarutobi had put him up to this.
"It's in my best interest." And I had plenty of reasons, too. "There's nothing else in this world that I hate more than those accursed eyes."
An image of vibrant red hair, violet eyes, and a delicate face surfaced to mind, leaving behind a sneer. Even my burning anger for her paled in comparison to the memories of those times I was turned into a puppet.
I couldn't wait to tear Obito to shreds. Madara, too, if I ever got the chance.
Jiraiya let out a thoughtful hum. "The enemy of my enemy is my friend, huh?"
"We are enemies only because your village kept enslaving me."
That got him quiet, his eyes shifting once more to the tall gate of my prison as a frown crossed his face. The better part of a minute passed in silence, teetering on the awkward, before Jiraiya opened his mouth again.
"Two months."
"For?"
"I'll drop by again in two months, and we can get him started on traini–don't give me that look, I need to take care of a spy network here." Jiraiya crossed his arms, glaring at me like a petulant child.
I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. "Fine. Two months."
"Good." Jiraiya smirked, and I already wanted to wipe that smug look off his face. "In the meanwhile, keep him practicing his chakra control. Two more months should get him to a good level."
Obviously. I was going to introduce the brat to tree walking soon enough.
"I want you to teach him how to make shadow clones."
I doubted I could possess a clone without an open seal, but it wouldn't hurt to at least try.
The toad sage cocked an eyebrow. "Shouldn't you be asking my teacher about this?"
I gave him an unimpressed look. He'd better not try to shirk this. "Sarutobi wanted to wait until Naruto had good enough chakra control, but the brat had already reached that point for a while now. I'm tired of waiting."
"The old man must have a reason for waiting. And it's not like it would make much of a difference in the long run if the brat learned shadow clones today or the next week."
Oh, wow. He really was.
"Did all that talk about the prophecy enter one ear and leave through the other?"
Jiraiya's face wrinkled in displeasure, before a sigh escaped him. "I don't exactly have time for that. I'm a spymaster, not a jōnin instructor."
He said that as if it was supposed to be an excuse, but all I heard was whining. My mouth curled with a frown. "It would take you less than half an hour to teach him."
Jiraiya turned around, walking away from the cage at a sedate pace, and I had to clamp down on the urge to release a wave of killing intent. "I'll remind Hiruzen about it before I leave."
Stubborn old bastard. I didn't need ninshū to know he was doing this on purpose.
Well, two could play at this game.
I leaned closer to the gate, a vicious smile curling my lips. "I suggest you pick up the brat tomorrow from the Academy, or I might accidentally let it slip to the old monkey how that Rinnegan boy you trained went on to become a founder of the Akatsuki."
My voice rumbled through the chamber, and Jiraiya paused mid-step as if frozen. He woodenly turned around, and, for a long, silent moment, just stared at me, eyes wide, dumbfounded.
"What?"
I faked a yawn, shifting to a more comfortable position before resting my head on my haunches.
"Well, this was an interesting chat, but you looked ready to leave, so don't let me hold you. I'll be taking a nap."
There was a flare of chakra before Jiraiya angrily walked up right in front of the gate, but I ignored him and simply closed my eyes.
"No, no, you're not pulling this shit with me." His voice came out harsh and grated on my ears. I tried my best not to smirk. "What do you mean by Nagato being a founder of the Akatsuki?"
I cracked one eye open, taking in the scowling man, before scoffing in amusement.
"Bye."
My lips peeled back, exposing sharp, ivory fangs, and, before Jiraiya could even react, I released a burst of chakra in the ninshū equivalent of a spiritual bitchslap, booting the toad molester out of the seal.
Have fun on that guilt trip, bozo.
"–and it's honestly a little unsettling how he has enough chakra to keep doing the leaf exercise so many times throughout the day. He's only five, and he already has more chakra than me."
Hiruzen listened patiently to the young man's concerns, unwarranted as they were. He couldn't begrudge Iruka for acting like this when he knew far too little of the truth surrounding his student.
"Naruto was born with an exceptional chakra, and those in his circumstances always grow far beyond the norm. One day, he will surpass even me in chakra capacity."
Iruka nodded, seemingly satisfied with the explanation. He was proving himself to be a capable teacher, though he could use being a little more open-minded about certain things.
"Thank you for your time, Lord Hokage."
"My door is always open, should you have any other concerns in the future." Hiruzen folded his hands atop his desk. "Do keep me updated with young Naruto's progress."
Iruka bowed his head wordlessly before leaving the Hokage office. Hiruzen picked up a paper from the stack to his left, idly skimming through it as a frown made its way on his face.
The Nine Tails was taking a more active role in Naruto's training than he'd expected, but, with everything that had come to light, it did not surprise him anymore. Jiraiya's report had brought quite the troubling news.
Pieces were moving freely in the shadows, painting a vague yet ominous picture, with that masked man being a part of it.
Not even a minute after Iruka left his office, the door opened once more, the sound of a cane tapping at the floor telling Hiruzen all he needed to know about the newcomer before he even looked up from his paperwork.
Danzō made his way to his desk, a frown even deeper than usual lining his weathered and scarred face. He must have found out.
Hiruzen folded his hands, holding Danzō's glare in a brief contest that brought a faint quirk to his lips. "Old friend, what brings you here today?"
Danzō's sole eye narrowed a fraction. "You know well why I'm here, Hiruzen."
Hiruzen found himself smirking. Nothing better than a sudden visit from his former teammate to make the day a bit less dull. A shame that Danzō tended to come by only when something displeased him.
"I suppose I do. Is there something you'd like to know?"
"I did not expect to be among the last to learn that our village might soon welcome the remnants of an old clan."
He made it sound like a matter of pride, but Hiruzen knew better than to take his old friend at face value. Knowing him, this was more of an issue of missed opportunity.
"It was a matter that I wished to personally handle."
"I see." Danzō folded his hands atop his cane, mouth curling with a frown. "Anything else you'd like to share about these Uzumaki?"
"An ANBU team led by Kakashi should be extracting them sometime tonight."
With a squad tailored perfectly for this mission and led by a shinobi like Kakashi, the outcome was more than assured.
Hiruzen found himself smiling. "By next week, The Leaf should officially house a new clan."
A brief silence filled the room as the two of them had another staring contest, before Danzō exhaled harshly, the corner of his lips tightening with the ghost of a half-smile. "I didn't expect this sort of play from you, Hiruzen."
"You sound almost impressed."
It was extremely rare of his former teammate to ever give a straight compliment, but he knew the man well enough to catch the subtlest changes in his voice.
Danzō's expression returned to its usual stony mask as he slowly walked towards the tall windows overlooking the village. "It makes me wonder how many more of them are out there, scattered across the Nations."
Hiruzen stood up from his seat, joining his old friend in looking at the horizon, hands clasped behind his back. "We might be too late now. We should have looked for them decades ago."
"They should have come to us for refuge in the first place." Danzō tightened his grip on his cane. "We've been close allies of the Whirlpool. The survivors had been foolish not to seek us."
His friend would have certainly loved to have some of them as part of his Root. It was the reason why he'd kept him in the dark about this in the first place.
Hiruzen gave a thoughtful hum. "Perhaps they tried, yet hostile elements denied them."
Danzō scoffed, though remained quiet.
They spent the better part of a minute standing there in silence, simply watching the village, before Danzō turned around, glancing from the corner of his eye.
"It's good to see that you're taking a more active approach to the jinchūriki's development."
The word had reached Danzō's ear as fast as he'd expected, though he seemed to have made his own assumptions on that matter.
Hiruzen gave his old friend a thin smile. "Young Naruto is showing a similar talent to his father. It would be a shame to let that go to waste."
The Nine Tails being the one responsible did make it oddly amusing, though.
Danzō's mouth twitched with the facsimile of a smile. "It's good to hear that."
Hiruzen watched as Danzō slowly walked to the door, his cane making a soft clacking sound as it tapped against the floor. Whatever his old friend had assumed, he wasn't going to disabuse him of that notion.
As the door closed behind the man, Hiruzen made his way back to his chair, reaching in his pocket and fishing out his pipe, along with a small, metal casing. Taking a seat, he flipped open the case, revealing his favorite blend of hidden leaf.
Smiling, he stuffed a pinch of dried leaves in his pipe, lighting it up with a finger and taking a puff. For a moment, he just savored the bittersweet aroma, before exhaling a thick plume of smoke as he sank deeper in his chair.
The Leaf had lost the Senju, but the mighty tree would grow stronger with the help of the Uzumaki.
He took another puff from his pipe, gaze drifting to the ceiling as he briefly closed his eyes. If only he could convince Tsunade to return…
Her jaw cracked with a yawn as her house came into view, her hands absentmindedly rummaging through her pockets for the key.
She managed to survive another day healing at the hospital. She was gambling with her life, she knew it all too well, but she had no other choice. The village was providing them food, a roof over their heads, and protection, and she had to repay their hospitality.
A scowl twisted her face, and she exhaled wearily through her nose.
Lately, she'd noticed herself starting to weaken. She wasn't sure how much more she would hold on, but if it meant protecting Karin… she'd do anything she had to. Give everything she had to.
Unlocking the door, she stepped inside her small house, reaching for the light switch in the kitchen and flipping it. A frown pulled at her lips when nothing happened.
Great. The light broke again. Hopefully, it was just this one.
On the table to her left, a plate with clumsily arranged food caught her eye, and she found herself smiling. Little Karin was doing her best, too. She had such a wonderful daughter.
The sound of footsteps reached her ears, and she looked behind at the door, only to freeze. The dark made it harder to see, but, right there, in the doorframe, stood a tall man with ashen hair, dressed in black and grey, a white mask with red markings like whiskers covering his face.
A shinobi.
Cold gripped at her chest as she stood rooted on the spot, her heart thundering like a drum.
He didn't look like someone from Grass, she'd healed enough of them to know. Who–
Her blood froze. Karin! Was she–
"I'm here to bring you and your daughter to the Leaf Village, unharmed," the shinobi broke the silence, his voice younger than she expected. "Please cooperate."
A relieved breath escaped her at his words, but she still couldn't stop her hands from shaking.
The Leaf? Were they after her chakra, too?
They used to be allies of the Whirlpool... Maybe they would treat her better? Karin should be safer, too, and–
"Get your child and pack what you can. We leave in five minutes."
The shinobi turned around, heading to the door, and she wasted no time, rushing to the room next to the kitchen.
The Leaf couldn't be worse than Grass. Karin could live a better life there.