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"Damn right I would. Money doesn't sleep."
Before anyone else could respond, the door slid open. Aizawa walked in, looking like he got even less sleep than usual. He stood at the front of the class, barely glancing at us.
"Good work at the festival," he said. "But don't get too full of yourselves. The real work starts now."
Kirishima grinned. "Man, you make everything sound scary."
"It should be," Aizawa said. "Because next up is your hero internships."
The room got quiet.
"Internships?" Uraraka asked.
"Yes," Aizawa continued. "Thanks to the festival, pro heroes have had their eyes on you. They sent offers based on your performances. You'll be spending time with them, learning what real hero work is like."
Kaminari fist-pumped. "Hell yeah, pro heroes!"
Mineta wiggled his eyebrows. "Does that mean I get to work under a hot lady hero?"
"Not if they have standards," I said.
"Rude."
Aizawa ignored us and pulled up a list. "These are the numbers."
It was filled with names and offer counts. Some had numbers in the triple digits. Others… not so much.
Kaminari whistled. "Damn, some of you got crazy numbers."
"Of course," Aoyama said, flicking his cape. "Natural talent is always noticed."
Bakugo leaned forward, scanning the list. "Tch. Who the fuck got more offers than me?"
"Half-half bastard," I said, pointing at Todoroki's name. "Also me."
Bakugo's eye twitched. "What?"
I stretched. "Crazy, huh?"
He glared at me, then at the board. His jaw clenched. "Bullshit."
Todoroki didn't react. He looked at his own name like it was someone else's problem.
Iida adjusted his glasses. "It seems that top placement in the festival significantly influenced the offers."
"Wow," I said. "Truly, a shocking revelation. Thank you for your contribution."
Iida ignored me.
Izuku checked the board. "I got a few…"
"Hey, that's not bad!" Uraraka grinned. "See? You're getting noticed!"
Izuku nodded, still looking unsure.
Kirishima looked over the board. "Bro, these agencies are serious. Some of these names are big-time."
Jiro tapped her screen. "Not like they just hand these out. They're scouting potential."
Kaminari pointed at a name. "Wait, is that Gunhead? Uraraka, you got Gunhead?"
Uraraka blinked. "Oh, uh… yeah."
"Damn," Sero said. "Dude's a beast."
She nodded, clearly still processing.
Mineta squinted at his screen. "Wait. Mt. Lady sent me an offer?"
I side-eyed him. "Probably gonna slave you to death."
Mineta frowned. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"We go back a long time. I can bet my ass on it."
Aizawa cleared his throat. "Choose wisely. These internships will give you a taste of actual hero work. Some of you may be drawn to big names, but consider what you can learn from them."
Yaoyorozu nodded. "That's true. Some agencies are known for mentoring, while others focus on publicity."
I looked at the number of offers. Huh. I had the most in class. A bit surprising, considering my "heroic" moments mostly involved bleeding out, cracking jokes, and throwing hands like a caveman.
Kaminari whistled. "Dude, you actually got the most? Bro, what kinda agencies are into whatever it is you do?"
I scrolled through the names. "Good question. Let's see… Musclehead Heroes, Fist First Agency, Street Justice Incorporated—okay, I see a pattern."
"Guess they saw your fighting style and thought, 'Yeah, this dude's built for reckless brawling,'" Sero said.
I pointed at another one. "Oh, this one's literally called 'The Back Alley Initiative.' Sounds like they do crime."
Kirishima peered at the list. "Nah, they're legit! They specialize in urban conflict resolution and takedowns."
"Urban conflict resolution," I repeated. "That's just a fancy way of saying 'jump villains in alleys.'"
Iida, who had been scanning the names, cleared his throat. "Perhaps they recognize your effectiveness in combat, even if your approach is… unconventional."
Bakugo scoffed. "What effectiveness? He won with cheap shots and headbutts."
"You say that like it's a bad thing," I said. "The goal is winning."
Bakugo's eye twitched, but before he could yell, Izuku cut in. "Some of these agencies are really big names. Have you decided where you'll go?"
I scrolled down. "Dunno. Whoever lets me do what I want, I guess."
"That's not how internships work," Yaoyorozu said.
"It is if you don't care," I replied.
She sighed, rubbing her temple. "You should at least consider which agency aligns with your future goals."
"My goal is to get stronger and piss off Bakugo," I said. "If they help me do that, I'm in."
"Keep my name outta your mouth, bastard!" Bakugo snapped.
"No."
Aizawa pinched the bridge of his nose. "Decide quickly. Your choices will affect your training moving forward."
Everyone kept scanning their offers. I noticed Izuku still staring at the board, frowning.
I nudged him. "You good?"
"Huh? Oh, yeah," he said. "I just… I didn't get as many offers as you or Todoroki."
I snorted. "Bro, half your fight was you dodging and nearly dying. Not the best ad for agencies."
He scratched his cheek. "Yeah, but—"
"Just pick someone and learn something useful," I said. "Better than overthinking it."
Izuku nodded but still looked unsure. Meanwhile, Kaminari pumped his fist. "Yo, I got a badass agency! Can't wait to get trained by someone cool."
Mineta wiggled his eyebrows. "I better get assigned to a hot pro hero."
"You better get assigned to therapy," Jiro muttered.
Aizawa grabbed his sleeping bag and pulled it over himself like he was done with life. "Time for you to choose your hero names."
The class erupted. Some people cheered, others started muttering ideas to themselves like this was some life-altering decision.
Mineta practically vibrated. "Oh hell yeah, I've been waiting for this moment my whole life—"
"Yeah, and society's been dreading it," I cut in.
"Rude."
The door slid open, and Midnight strutted in, hips swaying like she owned the room. She probably did. That leotard left nothing to the imagination.
"The hero name you choose will decide your future," she said, voice smooth. "You should be careful with them. They may stick, you know."
I chuckled. "Is that how Sensei got his name? Eraser Head?"
Aizawa scowled under his scarf like he regretted all his choices. Midnight giggled. "That's actually true."
The class broke into laughter. Kaminari slapped his desk. "Wait, seriously? That's the origin story?"
"Yeah," Aizawa muttered. "Regret it every day."
"Well," I said, smirking, "at least it's better than 'Tired Bag Man.'"
"Barely."
Midnight clapped her hands. "Alright, everyone, pick a name and write it on your board."
People got to work, muttering to themselves or bouncing ideas off each other. Bakugo just growled and wrote something down without hesitation, like he was daring someone to question it.
Kirishima looked over my shoulder. "You got anything yet?"
I twirled my marker. "Thinking about 'Chaos Fist.'"
He nodded. "That's badass."
"Or 'Gremlin King.'"
"…Less badass."
I ignored him and glanced at Izuku, who was still staring at his blank board like it personally insulted him.
"You freezing up again?" I asked.
He jumped a little. "No! I just—" He sighed. "It's important, you know?"
"It's a name," I said. "Pick one that won't make you sound like an NPC."
"That's… not helpful."
I grinned. "That's what I'm here for."
Around the room, people were finishing up. Uraraka flipped her board. "Uravity!"
"Nice," Sero said. "Simple, clean, rolls off the tongue."
"Thanks!"
Kirishima held his up. "Red Riot!"
"Sounds like a wrestling move," I said.
"That's why it's great."
Yaoyorozu smiled. "It fits you well, Kirishima."
Todoroki, as expected, kept it simple. "Shoto."
Mineta waggled his eyebrows. "Midnight, you wanna see mine?"
"No," she said immediately.
Mineta deflated. "Damn."
Bakugo flipped his board with a slam. "King Explosion Murder."
Aizawa sighed, already exhausted. "No."
Bakugo's eye twitched. "What? Why not?"
Midnight leaned on the desk. "It's a little… excessive."
"Then 'Lord Explosion Murder'!"
"No."
Bakugo looked ready to combust. "Tch. Fine." He scratched out some letters and rewrote it. "Great Explosion Murder God Dynamight."
Aizawa pinched the bridge of his nose. "This is my life now."
Midnight just smiled. "Well, at least it's a step forward."
I turned my board around. "How about 'Problem Child'?"
Aizawa stared at me, dead inside. "Too accurate."
Midnight giggled. "I like it, but maybe something with a little more hero flair?"
I smirked. "Fine. 'Reckless Endangerment.'"
"…That's worse."
"'Hazard?'"
"That's just a warning sign."
"'Menace?'"
"You're not naming yourself after your personality."
I sighed. "You people have no taste."
Izuku finally flipped his board. "Deku."
Bakugo twitched. "The hell, nerd? That's an insult."
"Not anymore," Izuku said, looking determined. "It's something Kacchan used to call me, but someone told me it could mean 'never giving up.' So I'm taking it back."
Midnight smiled. "I love it."
I stood up. "Nope. I veto."
Midnight blinked. "Why are you—why are you holding your balls?"
I duh'ed. "So you can understand I use my family veto rights. Waterworks, pick something else."
Izuku gawked. "What? You can't veto my name!"
"Yes, I can."
"No, you can't!"
"Just did."
Midnight sighed. "Is there a legitimate reason, or are you just being difficult?"
"I refuse to let my family name be associated with a word that sounds like a cheap toy brand."
Izuku groaned. "It's my choice!"
"And my right as your older, wiser, and significantly better-looking brother to stop you from making a mistake."
Bakugo scoffed. "The hell are you whining about? Let the nerd do whatever."
I ignored him. "Bro, think of branding. 'Deku' sounds like something you buy at a gas station."
Uraraka cut in. "But it's a positive thing now!"
"Is it?" I pointed at Izuku. "Say it with confidence."
He clenched his fists. "I'm Deku!"
"That sounds like a kid announcing they peed the bed," I said.
Kaminari burst out laughing. "Bro, he's got a point."
Izuku turned red. "It's not about sounding cool! It's about meaning something to me."
I threw my hands up. "Fine. Enjoy your discount knockoff brand of… whatever."
Midnight clapped her hands. "Alright, moving on!"
I walked to the front, holding up my board. "Bat-Man."
Midnight barely glanced at it before shaking her head. "Yeah, no. Copyright issues."
"Tch." I scratched it out and wrote the next one. "Night Prowler."
She gave me a look. "Are you trying to sound like a sex offender?"
"That was unintentional." I crossed it out and wrote, "Boy Predator."
Silence.
Midnight rubbed her temples. "Ryuu."
"Yeah?"
She pointed at the board. "Read it out loud."
I did.
"...Oh."
The class groaned. Kaminari smacked his forehead. "Dude, come on."
Jiro looked disgusted. "What the hell, man?"
"I meant a predator like an apex predator! And I am a boy!" I protested.
"Yeah, and nobody's gonna think that," Sero muttered.
I erased it. "Fine. How about—" I scribbled something else and turned it around. "Fist Wizard."
Aizawa exhaled through his nose. "No."
"Bro, why?"
"You are not calling yourself 'Fist Wizard.'"
I turned to the class. "Does anyone have a problem with Fist Wizard?"
Mina raised a hand. "It sounds like you do weird shit with your fists."
I stared. "I literally fight people with my fists."
"Yeah, but it still sounds weird," Kirishima said.
"Y'all are perverts." I scratched it out. "Alright, next."
I wrote "Street Champion" and flipped it around.
Aizawa stared at me. "Do you actually want a name, or are you just wasting time?"
Midnight held up a hand. "Wait. This one's actually not bad."
I raised an eyebrow. "Oh?"
"It's got that underground fighter vibe. Fits your style."
Kirishima nodded. "Yeah, it works."
Bakugo scoffed. "It's lame."
"Your name sounds like an energy drink," I shot back.
"The fuck did you say?"
"You heard me, Mister Great Explosion Murder Whatever."
He looked ready to throw hands, but Midnight clapped. "Alright! Ryuu Midoriya, hero name: Street Champion. Final answer?"
I erased it. "No, wait. Lemme think a bit more."
Midnight tilted her head. "Take your time, but let's keep it moving."
I glanced at Bakugo's board. "Wait, so you're actually going with that? You're really locking in 'Great Explosion Murder God Dynamight'?"
Bakugo tensed. "Yeah? The fuck's it to you?"
I waved my marker. "I just think you're missing out on better options."
He scoffed. "Like what, dumbass?"
I wrote on my board and flipped it. "Sweaty Hands."
Kaminari choked. Mina burst out laughing.
Bakugo's eyebrow twitched. "The fuck kinda name—"
"Or, if you want something classier," I wrote again, "'Boom Boom Bitch.'"
Jiro covered her mouth. Kirishima coughed, trying not to laugh.
Bakugo slammed his hands on the desk. "I'LL KILL YOU!"
"Relax, relax," I said, erasing it. "I got a compromise. BBB. Short, simple, and keeps the 'Boom Boom Bitch' energy without spelling it out."
"Why are you like this?" Izuku muttered.
"Because someone has to be."
Bakugo grabbed his marker and scrawled something aggressively. I peeked. He just underlined Dynamight like a psychopath.
Midnight clapped her hands. "Alright, moving on from Bakugo's existential crisis—Ryuu, have you decided yet?"
I tapped my marker against my chin. "Thinking. Thinking."
Kirishima leaned over. "You sure you don't wanna stick with 'Street Champion'? It fits."
I scribbled on my board. "Maybe." I flipped it. "'Menace to Society.'"
Midnight hummed. "Fitting, but maybe a bit… much?"
I erased it. "Okay, how about 'Wildcard'?"
She nodded. "I like that one."
I tilted my head. "Yeah. Yeah, that works." I locked it in.
Midnight turned back to the class. "Alright! With names decided, we move on to internships. Get ready—real hero work is about to begin."
Kaminari pumped his fist. "Time to see how pros do it!"
"Or how much they regret picking us," Jiro muttered.
I had a feeling the pro heroes were about to regret all of this.
Ryuu Midoriya – Wildcard
Izuku Midoriya – Deku
Katsuki Bakugo – Great Explosion Murder God Dynamight(after much arguing)
Shoto Todoroki – Shoto
Tenya Iida – Ingenium (taking up his brother's name)
Ochaco Uraraka – Uravity
Eijiro Kirishima – Red Riot
Denki Kaminari – Chargebolt
Momo Yaoyorozu – Creati
Fumikage Tokoyami – Tsukuyomi
Kyoka Jiro – Earphone Jack
Mina Ashido – Pinky
Mezo Shoji – Tentacole
Hanta Sero – Cellophane
Rikido Sato – Sugarman
Mashirao Ojiro – Tailman
Tsuyu Asui – Froppy
Toru Hagakure – Invisible Girl
Minoru Mineta – Grape Juice
Yuga Aoyama – Can't Stop Twinkling (because of course he did)
--
Better to rule in Hell than serve in Heaven?
Nah.Better to VOTE FOR RYUUthan burn in the Hellscape of forgotten novels.
Satan rebelled against God for less.And here you are, rebelling against Ryuu's humble request for stones.
Repent, ye sinner. Click the damn button.
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