I write to you once more. It seems I have become a fool. My mind and heart refuse logic; they long for something as absurd as love. It is illogical to miss someone you have only shared a hello with. It is irrational for the heart to ache when the reason is simply due to the mind's delusions. Oh, how it drives me mad; tell me, how can I be free of these delusions? After all, how can this absurd longing be considered love? It is simply delirium, yes, delirium. I must have at last lost my mind.
This hollow feeling at not seeing him ever again. It must be a sickness plaguing my mind and heart. Only fools believe in love. There is no such thing as a love that consumes you into oblivion and makes you want more and more. No, I refuse to be a fool. I refuse to live this way. The question remains: why must my mind insist on listening to my wicked heart?
The heart is truly wicked. It twists every little thing, making you lose your mind. Love is an absurdity, an absurdity, I tell you.
So, tell me, old friend, how do I get rid of this madness? My heart has twisted my mind, and my mind will not be logical. I gasp without reason, the ache in my chest growing with each passing day. The interactions are far too minimal to mean anything. Why must my mind betray me… I have always lived with reason, avoiding unnecessary things. Why are you doing this to me now?
There is too much chaos in my life. I do not need more. Just take all these unnecessary emotions away.
Let me be free. Love is for fools. I do not want to be a fool. Fools say and do absurd things in the name of love, even when it is not worth it.
I leave you, for now, old friend. If I continue to write, the madness of heartache will consume me to the point of oblivion. This heartache has no logic, and I hope against all hope that reason will find me once more…
ps.
This illogical heartache continues to plague me to the point of tears. Tears should only be shed for the dead. Thus I have come to the conclusion that my heart is the wickedest creature to have ever existed. Guard yourself, do not become a fool. I was too smug to believe I could escape such madness, but perhaps there is hope for you.