The underground lab hummed with the sterile glow of holograms. Tony circled the Mark I armor like a predator assessing wounded prey, his fingers twitching as if itching to scrub away the atrocity before him.
"Pink." The word dripped with existential despair. "You made my armor look like a My Little Pony crossover."
Leon leaned against a workbench, shoulders shaking with suppressed laughter. "Think of it as... post-traumatic chic. The kids on Instagram will eat it up."
Tony jabbed a finger at the glowing inscription on the chestplate: TONY'S ROSY HEART. "And this? Is this your idea of Shakespearean poetry?"
"JARVIS suggested it!" Leon raised his hands in mock surrender. "He said you needed more whimsy in your life."
The AI's voice oozed synthetic innocence. "My algorithms merely extrapolated from Master Leon's artistic vision."
"Whimsy. Right." Tony massaged his temples. "Next you'll be bedazzling my repulsors."
As the robotic arms hauled away the offending armor, Leon's grin turned nostalgic. He remembered teenage nights sabotaging Tony's dates with looped recordings of his cringiest pickup lines. Pepper had framed one particularly dramatic exit – a model hurling Tony's own "your eyes outshine neutron stars" monologue back at him – as office decor.
Malibu Kitchen, 19:30 PST
Pepper's hug nearly cracked Leon's solar-charged ribs. "You flew home? Through the atmosphere? Without a spacecraft?" Her eyes darted to the window as if expecting FAA helicopters.
"Relax, Pep." Tony emerged smelling of motor oil and wounded pride. "Turns out little brother here moonlights as a human ICBM."
The reunion dinner unfolded with chaotic warmth. Rhodey nearly choked on his bourbon when shown photos of the pink armor. "Should've added glitter," he wheezed. "Really commit to the Barbie aesthetic."
Eisen, now sipping Stark Reserve whiskey instead of cave-brewed hooch, marveled at the holographic menu. "In the mountains, we ate scorpions. Here, the scorpions are... digital?"
As dessert arrived – a quantum soufflé that defied gravitational logic – Tony's fingers drummed the table. "Stark Industries is pivoting. No more weapons. Just..." He gestured at the glowing city beyond the cliffs. "Clean energy. Medical tech. Maybe... flying cars."
Rhodey's fork froze mid-bite. "You want to arm the world with flying cars?"
"Peace through superior traffic control!" Tony's grin didn't reach his eyes. Across the table, Leon nodded imperceptibly. The real war was just beginning.