Determined to keep going. "And I know things have been hard for all of us—especially since Mom and Dad split. But sometimes, it feels like I was the one left behind. You all were so focused on trying to make everything okay, on covering up the cracks, that you didn't see how much I was struggling."
My voice faltered, and I looked down at my hands, fiddling with the edge of my jacket. "I love this family. I do. But I can't keep pretending that I'm okay when I'm not."
Grandpa spoke with his expression serious.
"We've made mistakes—there's no denying that. We thought we were doing what was best, trying to hold everything together. But in the process, we didn't see what you needed from us."
Jia's voice was softer than I'd ever heard it. "Taryn, I'm sorry too. I know I've been hard on you. I thought I was helping by pushing you, but I see now that I wasn't."
Devon piped up, his tone filled with sincerity. "Yeah, and I didn't realize how much it hurt you when I teased and talked about me like that. I didn't mean to take attention away from you, Sis. I'm sorry."
Grandma reached across the table, her hand an inch away from mine. "We love you, Taryn. All of us. We've never wanted you to feel left out or less than. And if we've made you feel that way, then we need to do better."
Jia exhaled slowly, leaning back in her chair. "This talk? We've needed it for a long time. I think all of us have been carrying things we haven't said, things we've avoided because it was easier to keep going than to stop and face them."
"Yeah. I guess it was easier to run away for me too. But I don't want to run anymore. I want things to be better—not just for me, but for all of us."
Grandpa gave a small smile, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "I may be harsh, yes, but we will get there, Taryn. Together."
Then, a fragile silence settled over us.
Just as I was gathering the courage to break the quiet, Jia cleared her throat, her voice steady yet cautious.
"Taryn, there's something we need to talk to you about," Jia began, her eyes locking onto mine. "It's not just Grandma and Grandpa who've been worried about you. Mom… she's been trying to help in her way."
"What are you talking about?" I asked, my voice sharper than I intended.
Jia glanced at Devon, who shifted uncomfortably in his seat. She took a deep breath before continuing. "Mom's been talking to your professors. Specifically, your history and science professors. She made a deal with them to keep you on track academically."
My heart sank as her words registered. "A deal? What kind of deal?"
"She wants you to focus," Jia explained carefully. "She's pushing you toward either law or medicine—says you have the potential to excel in both. The professors agreed to give you extra support, but it also means they'll expect more from you."
I stared at her, the weight of her words settling heavily on my chest. "She just decided this without asking me? Without even telling me?"
Devon finally spoke up, his voice hesitant but earnest. "Dad also thinks it's for your own good, Taryn. He's worried about you, even if it doesn't always seem like it. And… well, so am I."
I turned to him, narrowing my eyes. "Worried? Is that why you're always teasing me, making me feel like I'm not good enough?"
Devon looked away, guilt flickering across his face. "I wasn't trying to hurt you," he admitted quietly. "I thought if I pushed you—challenged you—it might help. I wanted you to see that you're capable of more than you think."
"That's not your job, Devon," I snapped, my voice trembling with a mix of anger and hurt.
"You don't get to decide how I should feel or what I should do."
"I wasn't trying to decide for you," he said quickly.
"I just didn't want you to give up on yourself. You're smart, second sister. Smart. And I hate seeing you sell yourself short, as what dad keeps saying."
Jia stepped in, her tone firm but gentle. "Devon's approach might have been misguided, but he's not wrong about one thing. You're capable of so much more than you realize. That's why even if Mom and Dad are divorced, they are pushing you—they see your potential, even if both will be going about it the wrong way."
"This isn't about potential. It's about control. Our divorced parents wanted me to follow their plan, not mine. And you two are just… what? Going along with it?"
"No," Jia said firmly, her gaze unwavering. "We're not going along with it. That's why we're here—to talk to you. To make sure you know what's happening and how you feel about it."
I clenched my fists, the storm of emotions inside me threatening to spill over. "How do you think I feel? Betrayed? Frustrated? Like I'm just a pawn in everyone else's game?"
Jia's expression went earnest."We're telling you this because we care, not because we agree with everything our divorced parents are doing. And believe me, I know what it's like to feel the pressure they put on us. I've been dealing with it my whole life."
I looked at her, surprised by her admission. Jia had always seemed so composed.
I said quietly. "You can decide and have what you want."
"It's not like that," Jia said, her voice laced with vulnerability. "I might make it look that way, but it's exhausting. Keeping up the top scores, staying ahead, making sure I'm good enough for the big companies Mom dreams about—it's a lot, Taryn. And it's not fair for you to feel like you have to measure up to that."
"I don't want to be you," I admitted, my voice barely above a whisper. "I just want to be me. But I don't even know who that is anymore."
Devon reacted with, "Mmm,"
He moved a little at the edge of his seat, his hands clasped together tightly, his knuckles turning pale as if he were holding onto something he didn't want to let go of. I could see it in his face—the weight of something heavy he hadn't yet shared.
"Second sister Taryn, when Mom and Dad split, everything changed. I was too young to understand what was happening, but I could feel it—the tension, the sadness, the way it felt like our family was falling apart. And you? You were the one who always seemed strong."