Necromantis sat on his massive obsidian throne, the room dimly lit by glowing green crystals. His long cape spilled dramatically onto the floor, and resting on his lap was a thick folder full of paperwork he was actively ignoring.
Beside him stood Greg — a tall, cold-eyed reptiloid with shiny, scaled skin and an aura of passive judgment.
Greg: "They're here, Sir Necromancer."
Necromantis let out a tired sigh.
Necromantis: "Great. More children. Let's hope this batch doesn't shout 'justice' every three minutes."
Greg simply shrugged, then pressed a hidden button on the wall. With a heavy groan, the massive steel doors of the lair slowly opened, revealing two boys standing on the threshold.
The first was Yoonso — a twelve-year-old genius with round glasses, a lab coat three sizes too big, and a grin wide enough to power a city. The second was Jihan, slightly taller, more serious, but with a spark in his eyes that said, "I'm here for adventure."
Yoonso: "Whoa! This place is just like a villain's lair in the comics!"
Jihan: "That's because it is a villain's lair…"
Yoonso clapped his hands excitedly.
Yoonso: "Cool! Do you have a self-destruct button? All villains have one in the movies!"
Necromantis: "Why would I have a button that blows up my own home?"
Greg cleared his throat.
Greg: "Sir Necromancer, you do have one. You insisted on it during your 'authentic evil experience' phase."
Necromantis turned slowly.
Necromantis: "…I said that?"
Greg: "Yes, sir."
Yoonso: "Can we see it?!"
Necromantis sighed and waved dismissively.
Necromantis: "Just don't touch anything. Greg, we don't have a backup lair, do we?"
Greg: "No, sir."
Necromantis: "Perfect. So, children. No buttons."
Jihan frowned slightly.
Jihan: "Why are we here, exactly?"
Necromantis stood and spread his arms dramatically.
Necromantis: "Welcome, future heroes! I am your official mentor under the 'Future Hero Program'!"
Yoonso: "A villain is going to teach us to be heroes?"
Greg: "Technically, Sir Necromancer is a former hero. Also, he's had… extensive contact with superheroes."
Necromantis: "Yes, because they keep interfering with my plans!"
Yoonso: "What kind of plans?"
Necromantis paused.
Necromantis: "…Currently? Filing my empire's tax reports so I don't lose my villain license."
Jihan and Yoonso exchanged a look.
Jihan: "That doesn't sound very evil."
Yoonso: "But it does sound extremely adult."
Necromantis rubbed his temples.
Necromantis: "Fine. Let's begin your training. Greg, explain to them how heroes work. I need coffee."
Greg turned to the boys, his toothy smile not at all comforting.
Greg: "Lesson one: if a villain starts monologuing about their plan — never interrupt. It ruins the drama."
Yoonso eagerly pulled out a notebook.
Yoonso: "Cool! Learning from the best!"
Necromantis muttered to himself as he walked toward the espresso machine.
Necromantis: "I used to summon meteors. Now I summon caffeine…"
It was going to be a very long internship.
...
Greg stood in front of a crooked blackboard with "LESSON 1" written in chalk that glowed faintly green. Jihan and Yoonso sat side by side on stone stools. Yoonso had already pulled out a tiny, homemade recorder bot that buzzed quietly, taking notes.
Greg: "Welcome to your first lesson in Villain–I mean, Hero Training."
Necromantis: "Greg."
Greg: "Yes, yes. Future Hero Training."
Yoonso: "Are we gonna learn how to punch through walls?"
Jihan: "Or how to fly?"
Necromantis walked in, holding a cup of coffee that read 'World's Okayest Overlord'.
Necromantis: "Lesson one — never start with punching. A good hero survives with brains, not biceps. And flying is for show-offs with capes and no taxes."
Greg: "Today's lesson is about Lairs and Layering."
Jihan: "Layering?"
Greg: "Yes. First, how to build your lair. Second, how to build your story. Every hero — or villain — needs drama, mystery, and cool lighting."
Yoonso: "Is fog required?"
Necromantis: "No. But it helps."
Greg pulled down a projector screen, revealing a PowerPoint titled 'So You Inherited an Abandoned Volcano: A Beginner's Guide to Lairs'.
Greg: "Lesson One Subsection A — Always know your exits. If things go boom, you run."
Jihan: "This feels more like villain advice…"
Yoonso: "I love it."
Necromantis sipped his coffee.
Necromantis: "I'm only doing this because the Hero League is paying me in receipts-clearing. Continue."
Greg: "Lesson One Subsection B — Hide your buttons. Especially the self-destruct ones."
Yoonso raised his hand.
Yoonso: "What if I want to show mine off?"
Greg: "Then label it something boring. Like 'Laundry Mode.' No one will touch it."
Jihan: "Noted."
Necromantis: "Also. Never deliver your plan before it's complete. But… do have a dramatic speech ready just in case you're interrupted."
Yoonso: "Do you have one?"
Necromantis: "I have twelve. Want to hear the one that rhymes?"
Greg: "No."
Jihan: "Yes."
Necromantis: "You'll hear it during training combat. Which reminds me — Greg, prepare the obstacle course."
Greg: "The one with lasers or the one with tax paperwork?"
Yoonso: "Wait, paperwork is an obstacle?"
Necromantis: "Only the worst one, my son."
The blackboard slowly turned, revealing a pop quiz labeled "Identify which villain's lair violates fire code regulations."
Jihan: "This is going to be weird, isn't it?"
Yoonso: "Weird? It's already amazing."
Necromantis: "Welcome to mentorship, kids. Hope you brought snacks. Or legal guardians."
They hadn't. But they brought enthusiasm.
And a suspicious number of gadgets.