POV: JACKSON
What just happened?
No, no, no, this cannot be happening. Surely, this is a mistake. That scent, just like vanilla, was intoxicating. It felt so....NO.
JJ had been jittery as we approached the location, but he couldn't articulate what was wrong. I initially thought it might be a rogue trying to hide their scent, but the reality was far more alarming than I had imagined.
Mate, mate, mate. JJ had exclaimed, bouncing and wagging his tail. I was frozen, unable to look away. I couldn't tell if it was my shock or the intensity of those black eyes holding me captive. I knew I had to leave, so I told Chris something urgent had come up. He looked utterly baffled.
No. This cannot be true. I was content, I was okay; I didn't want a new mate. I don't need a mate. I certainly don't want anyone taking Anto's place. Is this some sort of trick? Is the moon goddess playing games with me? Maybe it's just a mistake.
I found myself back in my office, lost in thought. The familiar faces of my pack greeting me along the road blurred together.
This was all so unexpected. Why must I have another mate when I don't want one? Yet rejecting him isn't an option; the repercussions are too severe. I can't put my son, my wolf, or my pack through that.
Him. A boy. My new mate is a boy. Does that mean I'm gay? But I've never felt any attraction towards men in my life. After Anto, I didn't find anyone appealing at all. Don't get me wrong; I have nothing against it, but this has to be a mistake.
"We reject him. Don't even think about it. You know the consequences of doing so."
"You really think I'm unaware of that? Still, JJ, I can't fully embrace him. What about Anto and Bay (Anto's wolf)?
JJ fell silent. After a moment, he replied, "Do what you feel you need to do, but don't turn him away." Then, he shut me out.
I let out a sigh. This wasn't how I envisioned my Monday. I was still lost in thought when Chris walked in.
"Hey, man, are you alright? You dashed out of there so fast. You were supposed to greet them," Chris said, confusion etched across his face.
Should I confide in him? What if I was wrong and didn't have another mate? It would all be for nothing. I'll share when I'm certain.
"It's nothing; something important came up," I replied.
"Are you sure?" His voice was laced with doubt.
"Yep, don't worry about it," I said, trying to keep myself occupied to avoid any more questions.
"Alright, if you say so. Someone's here to see you. It's Saint, the guy I mentioned who caused my delay," Chris said, settling into a chair.
The way JJ perked up told me that this boy was the name linked to my supposed mate. "Why is he here?" I asked, a hint of panic creeping into my voice.
Chris noticed my reaction. "He said he needs to ask you some urgent questions. Seriously, are you okay? You've never reacted like this before," he said, concern evident.
I didn't respond to his concern. "Where is he now?" I inquired.
"Downstairs. I told him to wait outside in case you didn't want to talk to him," he replied.
Should I meet him? I really need to sort this out.
"It's okay, I'll handle it. Just stay here; I'll be right back," I replied as I stepped outside.
I sincerely hope this is all just a misunderstanding. I don't want a n-... It struck me again, vanilla. I pushed open the door and found him standing there, leaning against the wall. As soon as I emerged, he turned his head so quickly that it would have been amusing if it didn't confirm what I desperately wished was a mistake.
I've got a new mate. A guy.
He cleared his throat. "Uh, I-, you're my-, we should-, I-" He faltered, rubbing his ears.
His voice is so gentle. I could listen to him all day. Upon closer inspection, he was shorter than me, with short black hair and deep-set black eyes. His lips were full and pink.
What am I even thinking?
He tried again. "I-I'm Saint. I came with the beta from another pack. I want-" I interrupted him.
"We can't discuss this here. Let's talk at my place. I'll arrange for someone to pick you up later." I said, turning back to head inside the building. Then I hesitated, "And don't mention this whole... mate situation to anyone." With that, I walked back inside.
The last thing I want is for the pack to find out about this before I've figured out how to handle it.
As I stepped into my office, I found Chris sifting through some files. I settled into my chair, and he glanced up momentarily before returning his gaze to the papers. "That was fast, did you talk to him?" he inquired.
"Yeah, we had a chat," I answered.
"Are you going to share what's bothering you now?" It was clear he wasn't buying my earlier responses.
I let out a heavy sigh. "I have a new mate," I confessed, leaning back in my chair.
"Wait, what?" he exclaimed, clearly taken aback. I was feeling just as stunned.
"You heard me correctly. The moon goddess has decided to bless me with a new mate," I said, sitting up and resting my elbows on the table. This was all a bit overwhelming.
"Are you certain?"
"Yeah, I just got confirmation," I replied, letting out another sigh.
A look of realization crossed his face. "Saint? Are you saying Saint is your mate?" he asked, still in disbelief. I nodded.
"Wow. I'm not sure what's more shocking: a new mate or that it's a guy," he remarked, leaning back in his chair.
"Try to imagine what I'm dealing with. I'm still processing it all."
"Well, this isn't necessarily a bad thing, right? You're not homophobic; you can give it a shot."
"That's not really the issue, Chris. I don't need a new mate. I'm perfectly fine with just my son and me," I said, frowning.
He studied me closely before asking, "Is this about Anto?"
"Yes, it is. I don't want to replace her, Chris. She was my first and should remain my only mate," I replied, the frown still etched on my face.
"Jackson, you're not replacing her. Anto can always have a place in your heart, even with a new mate," he said gently.
I couldn't bring myself to trust him. "I don't know, Chris. I'm not even attracted to guys. This isn't what I want, none of this."
"Are you really going to reject him?" Chris inquired.
"You know I can't. It's too risky and uncertain," I replied.
There was a pause before he continued, "Why not give it a shot? At least consider being friends with him."
"I suppose that's possible. I mentioned we would talk later at my place," I admitted.
"That sounds good. I've got to run; the team needs me for something." He rose from his seat and made his way to the door, pausing briefly. "I really hope you allow yourself another opportunity to love Jackson," he said before departing.
Love? My heart belongs to Anto; I don't want to feel that way about anyone else.
I need to discuss this with him. I just hope he'll see things my way. I'm confident I can persuade him that this whole situation is just a misunderstanding. Once he understands my perspective, he'll get it, right?