Addison immersed herself in her work, hoping it would help numb the pain slowly consuming her heart. As night descended, no one reached out to her or even sent a mindlink, leaving her feeling utterly isolated, as if she had been cut off from everyone.
But she pushed those thoughts aside and focused on the tasks at hand, continuing her work in the office with quiet determination.
Addison didn't return to her sleeping quarters on the fourth floor until the dead of night, as it was her usual routine.
But tonight, she hesitated outside the door, a nervous flutter in her chest. This room was no longer just hers, it was also shared with the Alpha. She had no idea how to interact with him now, especially since this would be the first time that they'd be sharing a space.
Addison stood in the hallway for nearly half an hour, wrestling with her uncertainty. When her resolve finally peaked, she pushed open the door, only to be met with the sight of their grand, empty room.
It was silent, cold, and devoid of the scent of her mate. The absence was stark, a painful reminder that Zion hadn't even bothered to grace their marital bed since his return.
"What did I even expect?" Addison whispered softly to herself, her voice trembling slightly as she lowered her head.
Even though she has lived in this empty room for years, tonight, it feels colder and more desolate than ever before.
With her heart heavy, she wandered aimlessly, hoping that a simple walk would calm her racing thoughts and tire her out enough to sleep without the weight of it all pressing down on her.
As Addison reached the second floor, a woman's coquettish moan reached her ears.
"Ah! Zion, slow down! You'll hurt the pup! Ah! Hmmm…" Her body froze at the sound, her breath catching in her throat.
The room was close to the stairs, and the door was slightly ajar, amplifying the intimate sounds. Addison's heart pounded painfully in her chest, and a wave of icy dread washed over her, making her feel numb and lightheaded, as if she had been drenched in cold water.
"I… I…" Addison muttered softly to herself, but the words felt hollow. She could no longer deceive herself, and she lacked the courage to confront them.
The thought of facing them, knowing she'd likely lose control and lash out, terrified her.
'So, this is why he wasn't in the room... he's with someone else.' A bitter laugh escaped her, low and defeated, as the weight of the realization crashed down. Helplessness seeped into her veins, and a deep sense of defeat settled in her chest.
She was consumed with pain, but she couldn't confront them, 'she didn't have the right.'
The fear that she might lose control, that she might hurt the woman or worse, take her life and add to the weight of her debt to Zion, paralyzed her.
She felt torn, a storm of conflicting emotions swirling inside her. All she could do was run. Without thinking, she bolted from the packhouse, her steps carrying her toward the woods as her tears began to fall.
She hated this vulnerability, hated how her tears betrayed her, how she couldn't stop them even if she tried. The ache in her chest felt unbearable. She had worked so damn hard, sacrificed so much for the pack and for Zion, only to find him in the arms of someone else.
'While I fought for this pack, he's out there fucking her, and he can't even touch me.'
'What better way to humiliate me than this?'
With blurred vision, Addison sprinted through the woods, her heart racing.
Though she couldn't fully shift, she still had some access to her wolf's strength and healing abilities, just enough to keep herself safe. It was a small comfort, a reminder that her wolf wasn't entirely gone, only... disconnected.
The bond felt frayed, distant, but still there—like a faint whisper in the back of her mind, begging to be heard.
"When are you coming back? I miss you so much..." Addison sobbed as she ran, her voice trembling with desperation.
She reached out to her wolf, trying to connect, but the silence was deafening.
She couldn't even remember her wolf's name, the name of the companion she had once known so well. It didn't matter. What mattered was that now, she was completely alone, adrift without her.
Addison only stopped when her legs could carry her no more, her body trembling with exhaustion as she collapsed to the ground. She found herself in a small clearing, the full moon casting its pale light above her. There, she broke down completely, her cries echoing into the stillness of the night as the weight of her loneliness crashed down on her.
But even then, she couldn't bring herself to question the Moon Goddess. Deep down, she knew this wasn't her doing. Yet, that didn't ease the crushing pain or the injustice she felt. For a werewolf, their mate and pack meant everything—everything, except their own life.
But now, Addison found herself without a pack to truly call her own, and even her mate, Zion, had turned away from her.
'Is this the price I must pay to settle my debt?' she asked herself again, though she couldn't feel the full sting of betrayal that other mated wolves endured when their bond was shattered by infidelity. Even so, knowing that Zion was fucking someone else was painful in its own right.
Her bond with Zion felt fractured from the moment they had marked each other incomplete; she couldn't fully feel him as a mate, as though some part of their connection had been severed.
She didn't know if she should be thanking this incomplete bond or not, for protecting her and not allowing her to feel the violent backlash of a mate bond's betrayal when their mate slept with another.
The excruciating pain would course through their bodies, as if their stomachs were being ripped apart and every nerve felt as though it were being pierced with needles. For those who managed to survive, the torment often drove them to madness.
But even when her body and mind were spared from this pain, her heart wasn't. She felt her heart being pierced by a knife, knotting violently as if it were being tugged and pulled.
However, even without the searing pain of his infidelity, their mate bond continued to wither and decay, leaving her in constant agony. Yet this time, as he lay entwined with another woman, she felt nothing but heartache.
"Why?! Just why?! Haven't I done enough?"
"Aren't my sacrifices enough?"
Through her sobs, she could only weakly question, expressing feelings that had long been suppressed. She always thought that once she did her best, she might, at the very least, receive a thank you from Zion.
Even if he did not forgive her, she hoped that he would at least try to understand her and that they could live normally like others.
"Have I not suffered enough?" She weakly murmured through her sobs, choking on her own helplessness.
She could feel her wolf stir inside her; it was faint, but it was there. 'Are you comforting me?' Addison asked, pursing her lips and holding back her tears. However, since the dam had broken, a flood of thoughts and emotions overwhelmed her, and she continued to cry for as long as she could, until she had released every tear she could.
'It's time to let go.'
A sudden thought hung in her mind, trailing like a heavy wind. Her cries abruptly stopped, but she also remembered Zion's words before he left for the battlefield.
Just remembering it like it was just yesterday, made Addison shuddered uncontrollably in fear as she could still vividly remember how ferocious Zion looked when he said it.
"I'll let you live a life of loneliness, I will make sure that you are tormented and feel the pain of having a mate who was disgusted by you and rather fuck someone else than your sorry ass, until the day you die, you'll suffer such. I will make you suffer and beg that you should have been the one who should have died that day."