The three months flew by, we were all too busy, the soldiers had increased their capabilities enormously, now they treated each other like brothers and radiated a happiness that infected everyone in the camp, now it was a very happy place.
Ashley had completed all the training, and we began final preparations for war. We were incredibly lucky not to have been attacked, and although they sent out scouting squads, they never found us. Staying hidden helped a lot; after all, the forest was vast.
Azumi had taught me a lot, I had several techniques thanks to her, but she emphasized that it is still not enough to beat the god of fire.
I was sitting at the old oak table in my shop, going over the copy of the plans I'd give to Mason and Ashley. It was raining, and Ashley came in covered in a towel; she'd just taken advantage of the rain shower.
"It's the calm before the storm, huh?" Ashley commented as she searched for her clothes.
—Definitely, before this type of calm made me feel strange, it made me feel afraid, after all I was constantly going from battle to battle, without any rest, but I learned on my long journey, that it is necessary to rest, not because our body can't give more, but because we have to face ourselves, let our demons out and fight them.
"You act like a general all the time, I'm starting to think you're nothing else, Mr. Sean Dorvin," he mocked me while raising an eyebrow.
—I've been pretty busy, in case you haven't noticed. Not that I have any free time to show you who I am.
"We've all shown our side while working, even Azumi, who's always laughing and making fun of things. You, on the other hand, stay serious all the time. Sometimes you make jokes, but you overthink everything. It's weird, because we see you as the one who's going to guide us to the light at the end of the tunnel, but I think you have a shadow, something that won't let you rest," she told me as she turned her back on me and put on her bra, still wearing the towel.
"What's all this about?" I asked.
"Tell me, do you like what you do? Or do you do it out of obligation?" she asked, as she dropped her towel to finish putting on her underwear.
—Why so many questions?
"I worry about you. I've seen you when you arrive, and you no longer have to act for anyone. You also constantly cry in your dreams. That made me think, and I realized I don't know anything real about you. I only know your exploits." She began drying her hair with the towel as she sat down next to me.
—I... I enjoyed what Ashley was doing... But I failed, the moment I relaxed, I thought I had time, that's why I failed, I don't have time for myself, or for what I carry... —I broke down on my last words, the words she had just said had stuck in my chest like daggers.
—Are you afraid of death?
—I'm not afraid of death or the consequences, but I am afraid of failing, for those who gave their lives for me, for those who trusted me.
—Those from our world didn't fight for you, they fought with you. If they sacrificed themselves so you could escape after the destruction of your base, it was for one reason only.
The rain began to fall with tremendous force, and the drops could be heard hitting the wooden logs that kept the tent from collapsing. I thought of all those who had fought with me, their smiles, their dreams, me... I had failed them, led them to their deaths.
—Ashley... They died because of me. I was going to go against the government because they kept mafias alive, and several of them were part of a white slavery elite. They weren't leading the country properly either. I had to do something, but I lost before I even started. Tell me, what did they want, Ashley? In the end, the group closest to me survived and decided to fight without me. They knocked me unconscious, tied me to a horse, and I ended up waking up miles away from the scene. So, tell me, Ashley, didn't they die for me? —A few tears escaped me. She shook her head and hugged me.
—I would do the same, and that's why I know for sure how they felt. They gave their lives for you, because you saved their lives, because you risked everything, but you got nothing, even now, you ask for nothing in return, they made the choice to follow you, they weren't forced, they gave their lives. Not so they would keep fighting, not so you could avenge them, it was so you could have a life you could enjoy. Everyone, even myself, can mentally rest and have fun with the boys—She murmured.
Still holding the hug, her skin damp, and her hair smelling of oak, I broke down for the first time since I lost them. I hugged her and cried.
"But you don't rest, you sleep because your body forces you to. They say you are what you do in your free time, but you don't have free time, you don't feel you deserve it, so who are you? You need to give yourself some time. Even if you die, you wouldn't have wasted your life, because even if this whole operation fails, we will die happy. Knowing there was hope. You saved us from the darkness we were in, you gave us something no one else could give us, you gave us the energy to fight and turn tears into laughter," Ashley continued.
"I have to give it my all, all the time, because once again I will be fighting with a strength greater than my own," I said.
She stopped hugging me, looked me in the eyes, and placed her hand on my chest.
"You're human, your heart isn't made of rock. Can you allow yourself to fight when their deaths still haunt you? You gave us hope because you showed us this side of you. Please don't do that to me. You don't have to show me or prove anything to me. I want you to be strong, but I want you to be strong because you feel that way, not because you have to act. That's what you've been doing all along, acting."
Her words resonated deeply with me. She was right. She acted like someone strong with the matriarch, like a super general with the soldiers, like someone who couldn't get enough of Azumi.
—My eyes are heavy and my body is getting slower and slower. I have to focus on something so I can act quickly. I fight because it's what I've done all my life, but I'm tired, very tired. At this point, I feel defeated.
"Rest today, as you yourself commanded." He took my hand, pulled me into the hammock, and lay down beside me.
"Why are you doing this?" I asked.
—I told you before, you saved me. I was in the imperial concentration camps. Your army came and saved those of us who were left alive. You could say I idolized you. My life was horrible until you changed that. In this place, I was able to live with you and I learned about you. You're too kind, you're even sweet, but you're broken. After all, you talk about fighting for everyone but yourself. I don't want that person who saved me to suffer. I realized this is the real you. You seem like a machine with a goal in mind, but that's the problem. You're a sweet, warm person, someone who can't help but form bonds with those around you. You like to help and guide, you enjoy company and the sound of the rain. I was simply able to see that there was something missing about you.
—I tried really hard to hide it. I don't think the boys are ready to see anything other than the immovable general who isn't afraid of anything, but I'm scared... Very scared.
-I know.
—It frustrates me, I shouldn't be like this, I had achieved it... I just had to make one more attack... And it was snatched from my hands, in the end I couldn't enjoy what I had achieved with the people I loved, as a child I wanted to go fight so my parents could come back with me, but they died during the war, I dreamed of buying a house on the beach, living with my friends, playing the games and watching the series that I missed, while I was fighting, I wanted to do all that with my friends and I feel like I should have died with them, because my dream was shattered the moment they left.
"I can do nothing more than offer you the chance to fulfill that dream by your side. After all, I won't die. After all, I made it through the grueling training. I want my hair to serve not only as a source of fear to my enemies but also as an inspiration to my allies. I want it to mean to you that there's a dream to fulfill." He took my hand and raised it, our fingers intertwined.
I stared into his green eyes. I could swear his eyes glowed in the darkness. I could feel him breathing and hear the rain lashing hard against the tent. His body was still damp and cold, but in that moment, I only felt the warmth of his body. Those voices in my head faded for the first time in a long time...
"I want to build a world we can live in, and this time I want to enjoy it," I whispered.
"We don't have to wait to enjoy the moment, laughing and loving are enough," Ashley murmured.
—It's... difficult... —I rested my head next to hers, both of us staring up at the ceiling of the tent.
—You know, I've admired you all my life, and after really getting to know you, I admire you even more. Even when you're broken, even if you don't know what you're going to do, you get up and face it. On the brink of defeat, you don't break; you fight, drawing strength from where you don't have any. Your tiredness goes far beyond the physical; you need help, but you don't ask for it because you think it's not your time. I admire your strength, because tired, wounded, and defeated, you saw a lost war and said, "I will lead them to victory."
—It's the only thing I know how to do, after all. But I think you're also admirable, Ashley. You trained at the level of these sick people through sheer willpower, you did all of that while maintaining a smile, even with a difficult past. You stood up at that moment and were willing to fight for people, just as they once did for you, and you do it without hesitation, without fear, confident in yourself. You're strong, Ashley, and I think you're even stronger than me... That's why I admire you.
We looked at each other and our faces were inches away from each other, we both closed our eyes and fell asleep, after all we were both tired.
"Sean, is the suggestion to sleep here still valid?" Azumi woke us up, entering the rain-soaked tent.
We both leaned our heads out from under the hammock and laughed a little.
"Did you drop your ranch?" Ashley mocked.
Azumi had built a roof on the tree for the rain and said she didn't need help.
"Please." She closed her eyes and let her shoulders slump as she exhaled deeply.
—Hahaha, sure. You can also dry yourself with the towel, I told him.
"I don't need it, but thanks." Azumi used magic to dry herself in seconds.
"And you really struggled to stay dry, huh? You're a pig!" Ashley mocked.
"I've told you a thousand times that I don't need to bathe, using magic has the same effect and I don't have to endure being wet," Azumi replied, while stretching.
"You're definitely a cat lady," he added, before bursting into laughter alongside Ashley.
"Wait a minute. Why is Ashley in your hammock instead of her own? She's in her underwear, too. What were you doing?" Azumi said with a mischievous smile, wanting to annoy you vengefully.
Ashley was surprised but reacted much faster than me, putting her hand around the back of my neck.
"Doing what you're never going to do," Ashley replied with another mischievous smile. Azumi turned as red as a tomato.
—Ah... I... I think... I better leave them alone —Azumi said embarrassed.
—But… —Ashley covered my mouth and prevented me from continuing to speak.
"What's wrong? Hurt?" Ashley asked, emphasizing the last word.
—No... But you... I'd rather... —Azumi had gone blank.
Ashley and I struggled to get her to let me speak. In the end, I won and was able to calm Azumi down.
—We're not doing anything, she's just making fun of your innocence. Anyway, you were the one who started the joke.
—Oh, please, that's too stupid. Even if we had been doing something, what the hell is so weird about that?
—Well, there are people who have something that you actually know very little about. It's called modesty. Besides, she's only 16. Could you explain more about it?
—I mean, they sent a 16-year-old girl to train a 28-year-old jerk who threatens a being they call god, yeah... Coherent... —Ashley replied.
Azumi regained confidence, put the naginata on the ground and lay down in Ashley's hammock, sticking her head out to talk to us.
—You wouldn't understand, I'm a genius.
"Yeah, I refuse to call a teenager who doesn't want to take a shower and built a roof that didn't last two hours in the rain a genius," Ashley commented.
"You're cruel, you know that?" I added.
"You love me just the way I am, Mo?" Ashley whispered, making me smile.
"I'd rather not pay attention to someone who can't even beat me one-on-one," Azumi responded to the taunt.
"So you'll stay with us until the war is over?" Ashley asked.
"I'm not ordered to help you in the war, only to train Sean. Only I can't return home unless you defeat the fire god. Until that happens, I'd rather be with you than alone," she replied.
"Tell me, what about your mother or your family? You're very young," Ashley asked.
Azumi's face darkened slightly and her eyes lost their sparkle.
—A long time ago, we suffered an attack by bandits. They kidnapped my mother. Even my father went looking for her. I must say that this was dangerous. In my village, women are usually stronger than men, which is why there are more female warriors than male warriors. Even taking that into account, my father also went out to look for my mother and, unfortunately, found her. She fought alongside the group that accompanied her, but they were killed. The bandits, seeing that my father had already found their trail and was following them, decided to kill the attackers to escape quickly. They killed my mother and some other people. They even killed the wounded or those who couldn't ride a horse from their own band. In the end, only me and my twin sister Akiko remained.
"That's why you trained hard to become the best in the village," I commented.
—Anyway. Thinking about the past isn't really that useful. When the call of duty comes, you can't really close the door on it.
I closed my eyes and let my head fall onto the fabric of the hammock, but just as I was about to rest, I was hit by a strong smell of burnt wood.
I got out of the hammock, put on my raincoat that was on the table, and quickly left the tent looking for the source. There were others also searching for the source of the smoke. Azumi came out prepared with her naginata; Ashley only had time to put the sniper rifle on her back. She was still in her underwear, but that didn't bother her at all. We were all worried about what we ignored until the rain.
"Mason, what's going on?" I asked him, who was returning to the tent with a group of soldiers.
"It's not here, I can assure you. It's not an enemy skirmish either; it must have been a lightning strike that struck a tree and it's probably burning." Mason slipped into the tent, leaving me without a better answer, as the rain was extremely heavy, even for a simple fire.
I was already completely soaked and it hadn't even been a minute since I got out.
Azumi opened her eyes wide.
"My village!" He ran off in the direction of his village...
Ashley prepares the boys in case of anything.
"You have to keep an eye out, in case I warn them about something." She nodded and quickly returned to the store.
I ran after Azumi; I had to improve my physical condition to keep up with her.
At a speed that was sickening for a human, we arrived at the village in minutes, the smell of burning meat growing stronger as we approached, which greatly upset Azumi.
When we arrived and were able to see the village, we were both horrified; it was a sea of corpses, and the protagonist of this was a man with a macabre smile, stained with the blood of his victims.
The scene was difficult to see; there were burned bodies, others split in half, the Japanese castle was completely on fire, and the grass had been dyed the macabre crimson color of blood.
The wind was blowing hard and at that moment, both Azumi and I felt one thing: We have to kill this bastard!
He turned to look at us, raised his weapon to the sky, showing off his trophy, like a barbarian. He had impaled the matriarch's abdomen with a claymore sword.