Chapter 1 - Looking not at you but your friend

It was my first class of school some dumb guy in my class was talking and it was funny and i kinda have a starring problem so I just zoned out and was still looking at the guy but then he tapped his best friend on the shoulder and I had realised I was starring and looked away but then the guy said I had liked his best friend and I was like no I don't even know him and I was looking at you because you said something dumb and I ended up zooning out and I had just realised what had said but I realised it was to late to take that back me and my adhd mind at that time I really wanted to get diagnosed I had really f up and now their going to be looking at me weird and the fact I had just started year 7 but then I was thinking about how he is kinda cute and I have never liked anyone in my life and he was their blue eyes pale skin dark brown hair he was half chinese half australian and I have a big thing for blue eyes and asian he was literally my type but then the guy I was starring at started to say I had liked guy let's call him Alan and I was like nooooo I don't but then Alan said I like the guy I was starring at him and said I didn't then teacher noticed we were talking and we got told to be quiet I was sad but from that on I kinda started to notice him and you know it was weird like I didn't know what I was feeling but then just started notice him more then every other week turned into days and then a day then just looking at him every day I really like him but I have to stop because I'm muslim and I can't date him and it's better to stop liking him.