Chapter 2:
"Damn, I really turned into a baby!"
After Li Ji regained consciousness, it took him more than ten minutes to accept the fact that he and the baby in the spherical spacecraft were fused together. The baby's body was not fully developed, and the sound he made became "Woo-wah-wahwah."
"Mr. Howard, there seems to be a sound over there." An agent with sharp ears heard Li Ji's cry and pointed in the direction of the noise.
"Go over and take a look." Howard had a retro police chief's standard mustache, a pipe in his mouth, and his suit casually draped over his shoulders. He took a puff of smoke and walked toward the direction the agent had pointed.
Several agents trotted ahead and reached Li Ji's location first.
"Report to Mr. Howard that we have found an unknown spherical object and a crying alien creature. We cannot confirm its danger and aggression at the moment. Do we need to kill him on the spot?"
The agent's English had a strong Montana accent, but Li Ji could still hear it clearly. When he realized they were considering shooting him, he cried even louder.
"York, don't scare the kid. Look at him—does he look like one of those green-headed, short-limbed alien frogs?" Howard stepped forward and glanced at Li Ji through the glass. "What a cute little guy."
"Mr. Howard, I hope you won't be fooled by his appearance. Tigers are also very cute when they're young! Look at his hair—what kind of baby has such thick hair? And that tail behind him! There's no doubt he's an alien creature!" The agents spoke with conviction, their duty to protect Howard taking priority over his decisions.
"Okay, I admit defeat. Let's take him back for examination first." Howard put away his pipe, realizing it wasn't appropriate to smoke in front of a crying baby.
"Mr. Howard, do we need to transport this big sphere with a diameter of over ten meters back to the base?" Howard's deputy asked nervously.
"Why not, Jarvis? There was violent space activity detected here before, and now we see this big ball. I need to take it back for study—there might be alien technology inside." Howard walked around the craft. "It's a perfect sphere."
"Should we remove the baby first? The spherical shape will be difficult to secure, and there will be bumps along the way. If he's too fragile..." Jarvis suggested.
"Oh my God, I'm really not a qualified father! I used to forget little things like this when Tony was a child. Thanks, Jarvis. Now, let me figure out how to take this cute little guy out without damaging the craft."
Howard carefully examined the exterior, looking for a way to open it. But to his surprise, the entire structure was seamless, as if molded from a single piece.
"Mr. Howard, the hatch seems to have opened automatically."
Howard, still inspecting the craft, waved a hand dismissively. "I know, I'm working on it. It'll open soon."
"What? It's already open?" He quickly corrected himself. "Oh, I see! I must have touched the right spot. That must have been the opening mechanism! Of course, it was! Hahaha!" His unconvincing laugh made Jarvis cringe.
Li Ji had stopped crying and scanned his surroundings. The people outside were all in neat suits, looking serious and professional. They didn't seem like the type to be trifled with.
"I hope they won't arrest me and slice me up for research," he thought. As an alien visitor, he couldn't shake the eerie stories of Area 51 he had heard growing up—legends of aliens either being imprisoned, dissected, or forced to work underground. The more he thought about it, the more he feared for his fate.
Howard approached the open hatch and looked at Li Ji. "Baby, you're adorable, but your hair—why is it combed in the middle? I suggest shaving it off, like those Chinese kids with shaved heads."
Li Ji nearly laughed. "A shaved head? Do kids in China even do that anymore?" He wanted to refute Howard, but all that came out was more baby babbling.
"You're angry? Hahaha! Boys need to have a bit of temper—that way, they mature faster and attract girls sooner!" Howard reached in and lifted Li Ji out. "Oh, you're a tiny thing, but surprisingly heavy. Guess we'll have to change your bed often."
Li Ji was still trying to process Howard's words when he suddenly felt a strong "urge." He wanted to hold it in, but his underdeveloped body had other plans. Within seconds, a flood was unleashed directly onto Howard.
"Ah, the mellow aroma of baby urine," Howard remarked with a straight face. "I believe you'll become an excellent human being." He playfully smacked Li Ji's bottom twice. "Snap! Snap!"
"Mr. Howard, you could be prosecuted for child abuse," Jarvis calmly reminded him.
"Oh, it's fine. Look, he didn't even cry! I bet he enjoyed it!" Howard laughed. "Jarvis, tell me—doesn't he like me a lot?"
"I bet he likes you even less than Tony does."
Howard's smile faded. "Let's head back to the base. Figure out how to transport the big guy—I'm leaving first."
Li Ji held back his tears. Even though he was in a baby's body, his mind was that of a grown man. Crying because of a little spanking? That was too embarrassing.
He was then placed in Howard's car, an old-fashioned model that immediately made him nervous. "This retro car seems a bit too much. What if it stalls or the brakes fail and we drive off a cliff?"
Unease crept in, but the drowsiness of infancy took over. Lost in thought, Li Ji drifted off to sleep.
Howard gently placed him on the seat, his eyes filled with an unexpected warmth—a fatherly kind of affection.