The Sweet Reality.
A profound sense of tranquility floods my mind. The incredible pain and despair have left my body in this moment. Unable to gather strength, my feet give way, and I fall to the ground, my vision still blurred. Slowly, that coldness is replaced by a pleasant warmth.
From head to toe, my nerves begin to activate, making me feel the blood flow in my body.
"Marco!"
A woman's voice sounds, although despite hearing it, it seems distant. I'm still not able to see.
"Marco!"
Then, an external sensation touches my body. My eyes slowly start to receive the rays of light. My sight returns, and in front of me, I see a girl with silver hair and amethyst eyes. Her worried expression makes her look charming.
"You..." I whisper to the girl, still with a lost gaze.
In that instant, sitting with my hands on the ground, several memories begin to invade my mind. Like a train, they enter my head without even asking for permission.
The memory of fighting against the thieves comes with all the pain of the battle. My body reacts instinctively, and my hands grip the ground.
"Mar... Co!"
The smell of blood fills my nose. The feeling of adrenaline tightens my muscles. The memories rush through my mind and etch themselves forcefully.
"Agh!" I scream for a moment. My body, as if awakening from a dream, brings me back to reality.
The fresh air moves my hair, and Emilia's worried face looks clear and strong.
My body trembles from what happened, but now it feels like déjà vu.
I take Emilia's hand to get up, trying to digest what's happening while she keeps asking if I'm okay.
Then, I feel something hit my cheek.
"Marco!" Puck gives me a tap with his tail. Both he and Emilia look puzzled by the situation. Seeing them, I can't help but take a deep breath.
"I'm sorry, I just blanked out for a moment," I say, looking at my chest, trying to confirm what happened.
The thrill of having experienced something, of enduring such pain, which feeling that makes you doubt this reality. I can remember the pain; I can remember the desperation. I can remember their sacrifice.
My second life ended in the blink of an eye. Now I have to embrace the third.
"Are you okay?" Emilia takes my hands to check if there's anything wrong with me. Her expression changes, worried, and her hair flows as she expels healing magic into me.
The glow of her magic gives her already beautiful face an angelic aura. Her skin is smooth and seems peerless at first glance.
If you put me next to a supermodel, she would consider herself ugly compared to Emilia.
"Yes..." I move my hand to my chest. "It was just a momentary thing."
So that confirms it, I have the power to come back from death, and I'm in the world of that novel.
I don't know how or why, or even if the fact that a novel becomes reality means that this reality is also a novel.
But the pain is real, the desperation is real.
"You shouldn't continue," Emilia says reassuringly. "I'll go and come back when I get the insignia." She looks toward the path, showing determination while also worrying about me.
But I'm not worried about her, let alone her life.
"I'll tell you my name before I go."
Emilia, turning her back to me, says:
"My name is Satella, I'm a half-elf."
She stands there. I know she's waiting for my reaction, hoping that I'll stay despite what she said.
But when I realize it, I'm already several meters away from her.
I run; I start running away from her. I'm not thinking, I'm not considering her. I'm just being honest with myself.
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry."
My legs don't stop; step by step, I speed away, raising dust from the ground and leaving a trail of footsteps.
To flee, to run away from everything. To escape my troubles and the people who want to kill me.
That feeling made me feel in the Earth again. Escaping from the military, escaping from mercenaries, fleeing, and secluding myself in places like a hermit.
In the end, I'm even going to let that girl who saved my life perish, just as I let my grandparents die and was unable to prevent the tragedy that took my colleagues and my family. I feel like filthy trash.
Military training? Is it my fate to always live under the shadow of death?
All my history, all my experiences, are reduced to the ineffable sensation of having perished. Am I really willing to waste my existence for one person?
What foolishness!
Perhaps it would be simpler to accompany Anastasia or Crusch in their businesses. In the worst-case scenario, I would at least have the means to lead a comfortable life.
What does it matter if I am brought back to life in an uncertain future? As long as I can enjoy comforts and don't have to flee like I did on Earth.
When I finally come to my senses, I find myself at the exit of the slums. In front of me stand normal, large, and adorned houses. People watch me with indifference, simply continuing with their lives.
"I fled."
I sacrificed the lives of those bazaar inhabitants for my own. But I don't feel such deep remorse; after all, I didn't know them. I had no connection with them.
"I fled."
I remain motionless, watching life go on as usual around me. My thoughts focus solely on my life plan.
"I fled."
Now it will be easier to make my way to Crusch's mansion; I just need to discover its location and present myself as someone willing to work in her service. I must show her what I know and start forging a new life.
If for some reason I'm not successful with Crusch, then the alternative is to head towards Anastasia. Although the path may be more challenging, if I manage to reach her, at least I would have a secure future.
My stomach churns, and a feeling of regret washes over me.
"Always running."
Is there anything wrong with running? I don't think so. After all, fleeing is a primal instinct that awakens in the face of danger.
It's what has kept me alive so far.
The hours pass, and I remain standing, watching as the lights come on with magical crystals.
Although there are fewer people around me, for some reason, it feels like I'm watching a movie.
Fleeing has brought me to this point.
"To the death of all your loved ones."
I think about that, but at the same time, I know it's a simplistic perspective. What other choice did I have? Several times I was willing to give my life, but I couldn't do it.
I didn't betray anyone, but somehow, I'm implicated in their deaths.
I look at my hands, still trembling but eager to act.
In this new world, I must be different. If I continue to run, the same fate will repeat itself. There will come a time when there's no escape.
The people in this place live their lives just like on Earth, filled with hopes and desires.
They live wishing for a second chance to do things better.
I have that opportunity, but my own cowardice weighs on me like a millstone. I clench my fists tightly, trying to find the courage I need. Maybe it's already too late, or maybe it's not; I don't know.
The night is illuminated by the full moon, which shines with an almost magical intensity. Its light falls on me as if it's calling me to do something, something that could change my destiny.
My body trembles, filled with fear and uncertainty, but my heart urges me to try, not to give up in the face of adversity.
As I walk through the streets, I observe people carrying on with their everyday lives, oblivious to what's happening inside me.
They walk with their children, chase their dreams, houses illuminated by magical streetlights, and everything seems normal.
But behind me lies the evidence I know I must confront if I wish to better my life.
If I want to change, I'll have to try.
After several hours, for the first time in my life, I turn around and start running.
But this time, I'm not running to escape; I'm running to face my fears and my past.
In the slums, the only light guiding me is the moonlight, but I don't mind; I need nothing more. I run, kicking up the sand, feeling the nighttime breeze on my face, and I know I can only move forward, confronting myself.
In the distance, I see that bridge, the same one where I left Emilia.
I thought she'd be there, I thought I could offer her my help, but she's not present.
Why would she wait for a coward like me?
I run in the hope of getting there in time, but with each step, my thoughts become more chaotic. Will I be able to do it? Will I die again?
Finally, I arrive at the location and see signs of battle in the bazaar. Mana crystals scattered on the ground, shattered windows. Have I arrived too late?
Perhaps I have, but I won't give up. There's still a chance to change my destiny, and I'm willing to fight for it.
Then...
BOOM!
The bazar explodes with a deafening roar, sending debris in all directions. A wave of cold sweeps through the area and hits me, making me fall to the ground.
Snow begins to fall, covering everything in its white blanket. I know what this means: I've arrived too late.
People's screams are horrifying. Chaos has taken over the place, and all I can do is look ahead, paralyzed.
I see how, from what used to be the mansion, a giant monster emerges. A creature that seems to be a mixture of a cat's fur and the appearance of a lion.
Its mere presence is imposing and makes me understand, once again, that I have arrived too late.
The monster roars into the air with a force that shakes the ground, while the coldness increasingly envelops me.
"Marcooo!" Puck shouts, transformed into a monster in front of me. His thirst for blood is so intense that it makes me want to run, but I have nowhere to escape, so I have no choice but to face my destiny.
The creature lowers its head and looks directly at me with an expression of anger.
"Did you know? Did you know this was going to happen, and that's why you ran away?" it asks me with a hot breath, contrasting with the coldness that freezes me from within.
Its voice reflects pain and fury.
"Yes. I knew," I reply, accepting the reality from which I cannot escape.
The monster screams in fury and stomps beside me, throwing me and making me roll on the ground.
The nearby houses are frozen, and I fall near the bridge I had escaped from, as if it were a call from destiny to my own cowardice.
I can't feel my body; my head is spinning. I try to exert force, but my body doesn't respond to any impulse.
"I couldn't do anything. I'm not with the bad guys. Simply put, if I had said no, they would not have believed me," I tell Puck, looking him in the eyes.
I am not lying.
I am scared, but at the same time, I feel calm. Somehow, knowing that I am not going to die is reassuring. I no longer need to run, although I wish to avoid the pain. There is no longer a need to flee.
Puck growls at me, putting all his anger and pain on me.
"Emilia. You dared to let her die. The person who matters most to me, a simple unknown human like you, let her die," his tone makes me understand his regret; he could not do anything for her either.
"I will pay for my sin. I will save them, so... kill me," I ask with determination, looking at him squarely. Upon hearing my words, Puck raises his paw.
"Bastard. So, you could do something," Puck comments with resentment as I watch his paw move downward, in slow motion.
I am not afraid; on the contrary, I am calm. I think I see a path; choosing the easy way out led me to failure, so this time I'll take the difficult path and make myself stronger.
I look up, and all I can see is Puck's paw, about to reach me.
"Stop!" shouts a familiar voice.
"Again... You're too late."
My body crushed by Puck's paw, leaving me as a mass of flesh and bones.