The ceremony to give the murdered children a final resting place was over. Each and every Angel had attended not only the vigil but also the ceremony in complete silence. They would forever be part of the palace garden. For some, a place to mourn what had been lost. For others, a sharp reminder that such a thing should and could never be allowed to ever happen again. Alexander was the last to stand in the middle of the rotunda. He drew his sword and ignited it. With one motion and a raucous cry of pain that could be heard throughout the Silver City, he rammed it into the marble floor right in the center of the monument. An eternal flame made of Heaven and Hells fire. To him it would forever remain a monument that reminded him that he had been too slow, too late, to save them all. Numerous scenarios were already playing in his head, how he could have managed it differently, could have saved them all. It was clear that he was mentally punishing himself. His face spoke volumes, the sadness clearly marked. The intimate circle around him saw that he was struggling to keep himself straight but he dragged himself into the palace on his way to his private quarters that were now not so private.
Ella, who could almost literally feel the pain he was suffering wanted to run after him, to embrace and comfort him but she was stopped by Celine. The Demon looked at her and simply shook her head.
"But why? He needs our support, no one should have to go through this on his own."
she said saddened. The Demon smiled gently and spoke:
"That's been Samantha's job for years. The rest? Come along not out here in the open."
At a respectable distance they followed Alexander toward the palace. They just saw him enter his suite and gently close the door behind him. Knowing full well that there were others present whom he absolutely did not want to disturb.
The three stepped into the suite provided for Lucifer and Ella. Lucifer didn't even bother to play the perfect host. He set a few bottles and glasses on the coffee table. He disposed of his breastplate and sword, which he tipped into a corner somewhere and plopped down on the couch. Ella, as if she had been doing it for years instead of less than 72 hours, instinctively nestled against him on the couch. Lucifer in turn took her protectively under one arm without thinking. Celine took a seat in a spacious comfortable chair across from the two. After pouring and chugging a generous glass of rum for herself, she spoke to Ella:
"Alexander Marcus Morningstar no longer exists, at least not in the form of 72 hours ago. He is now God and the crown that comes with that is sometimes inhumanly heavy. If you had addressed him now he would have brushed you off and pretended nothing was wrong. Don't get me wrong there will be times when you two, everyone from his intimate circle, will be able to help him. But this is not one of those moments. This is a moment that only Samantha can help him. He has already told you a great deal about a great many things. Did you perhaps notice anything that was missing from that story?"
Celine looked piercingly at Ella and saw that the latter was reviewing everything. Suddenly she took a sharp breath and said:
"He didn't say a word about how he grew up as a child and how he died at that young age. As if it wasn't important."
Celine sighed deeply:
"I wish it were like that. Remember when he said they dropped his soul into the body of the wrong baby?"
Lucifer suddenly realized that he too had not heard this side of the story and began to feel very guilty that he had never asked about it. He and Ella simultaneously nodded that they knew what this was about.
"Man was that a goddamn misfire. He should have been placed in the body of a baby to be stillborn within a family that would raise him with warmth and love, with compassion and mercy. The chosen father was a lawyer who was always committed to helping the poor and underprivileged, and at no charge. The mother worked as a pediatrician in a hospital but was also very, very often to be found in those free clinics where the really poor could go because everywhere else they were refused because of no insurance and that kind of bullshit. Their influence on Alex would be something that he could very well use in order to spread the light of the Lightbringer he carries within him in that universe. It was never the intention of the four that he would return to take on Godfry. This one had discovered every Nefilim up to that point and they did not want to take the risk that the son of Lucifer, their brother and the Lightbringer would suffer the same fate. It was basically a rescue mission to save something from the Lightbringer. Unfortunately, it was not to be and he found himself in a completely opposite world. A completely different universe, my universe. It is due to his own pure goodness that he became what he is today. His childhood until he died was nothing but psychological, physical and mental abuse, no torture is a better word. I have no other way of describing it except one that would be much less neat. The family he grew up with in the other universe, I'm sure they are rotting in hell. Why do I know that? Because I was there when they were sent to Hell and that by Alex himself and he was thirteen when he did it. Can you imagine the willpower he must have had even back then to do such a thing at that age? Now that we do have contact again with my universe and with the king of my Hell I will ask him for permission to visit them in Hell for a while! I have been with Alex for 6000 years, resided by his side. And after six thousand years I'm still not over what was done to him and it didn't even happen to me. There's something deep inside me that itches, and I'm only going to get rid of that itch by paying those monsters in Hell a visit. The last six thousand years on your Earth have taught me a few things that will come in handy! And if I don't succeed the first time? Don't worry; if Alex taught me anything, it's that sometimes it's better to be patient and simply try again later until you get the desired result. Admittedly in the beginning I was skeptical about Alex. What could he do that another couldn't. How long would it take before power affected and corrupted him? However, he proved to me time and again that his goodness comes from the depths of his heart. That his moral and ethical compass are chiseled in granite. One of the first examples he set was in our Dis. To save an innocent girl he absolutely went Old Testament on a jerk of a Demon. A kid of thirteen made the whole of Hell literally tremble on its foundation to save a girl. I would lay down my life for him any day, and he would do exactly the same for me if no one would stop that idiot.... And not just for me, for anyone he sees as an innocent or family."
She refilled her glass to the brim and knocked it back as if she were drinking pure water. But sadness was visible in her eyes. It was clear that Alexander meant a tremendous amount to her.
"I remember like it was yesterday. The first time I met him. I was overprotective as far as Samantha was concerned. I've known her since she was a baby. As mentioned I was present when my baby girl was born. I've been her nanny. I demanded that he allow me to link with him. What I saw made even me pale and I am a fucking Demon. Mazikeen pales in comparison to me and what I am capable of! Alex never talks about it to anyone. The only ones who have heard his full story from his mouth are the Goddess, the God and Samantha. It has been foreign to him since he was a small child to lean on others at the times he needs it most. As a child he was extremely punished for supposedly being weak or showing weakness. Now he smiles briefly and then gently pushes everyone away so he can try to deal with it on his own. I have been by his side for 6,000 years, as I said, and he doesn't let me in most of those moments either. The thing that made me nauseous was the way he died, or rather was killed by those who should have protected him. And I mean literally nauseated. Because trough the link I saw and felt it as if it happened to me. The wounds and the burn marks you saw on his arms were inflicted on him by the man who should have been his father instead of his executioner. They recur at times of severe stress as a kind of physical manifestation of the PTSD he has. And are worst when he is confronted with children being abused. Sometimes it is so bad that the blood runs off him and you can almost smell the cigarettes that were pressed on him. His father literally beat him to death with a hammer while his mother watched."
Ella pulled away pale at that last sentence as if she were going to be sick herself, and Lucifer had gotten teary-eyed.
"But how can we help him?"
He asked in despair:
"I have been the king of Hell for so long and still am. I know that loneliness and pain all too well. Everyone needs someone in such moments. If we can't do it who can?"
With a mysterious smile on her lips, Celine said:
"Ah you saw that. Samantha is his lifeline and those two were born for each other. Lot at her best."
Ella squeezed her eyes shut a little and asked uncomprehendingly:
"I've heard you talk guys about Lot a few times now as if it were a real person. What exactly do you mean by that?"
The Demon's eyes began to twinkle:
"There is the saying that God works in mysterious ways. Compared to Lot, he was a fat amateur!"
She stood up and said:
"Don't push him because otherwise he will push back, let it come from himself. He will sooner or later open up to you now that his mission is over and he is finally home. He just needs time. Remember he has been on the road for six thousand years where he did not have a choice, never exposing himself so as not to risk a time-loop and thus failure and not being able to save you. Well I'm going to leave you guys and find somewhere to crash. Something tells me that the fewer people there are in Alex's suite right now the better it is for Samantha and Lot to do their jobs."
Alexander knew the three were following a short distance away but he knew Celine well enough to count on her not following him into the suite. He wasn't worried about Celine; knew she was always welcome in the city in a well-defined bed. And was more than happy about that and the second occupant of said bed. As he stepped inside the still rather spartan room, he was almost grateful for the silence. He knew the three children were sleeping the sleep of the innocent and that Samantha was in the room with them watching over them. Jo a short distance away in a waking sleep in case she was needed. Celine's room would remain empty tonight and all seemed quiet in Azrael's temporary room as well. He stepped into his own bedroom and divested himself of all clothing. He had turned his room and the guest room into their spacious room with a very spacious bathroom and walk-in closet. Ideally, he wished he could throw his clothes so hard they would fly through the wall. Naked, he sat down on the bed and with the snap of his fingers a bottle of vodka appeared in his hands. With a vicious tug he stripped the bottle of its cork, put it at his mouth and let the liquid flow in. The burning did well but would not have the effect he needed right now. He hadn't gotten drunk in the last 6,000 years, something he lamented about his celestial state. Right now he would give an arm or a leg to get totally wasted. Totally lost in his thoughts and reliving the most painful moments of his existence, he must have started weeping softly halfway through the second bottle. Every fiber in his body cried out to scream it out, to let it all go but he could only silently scream at himself and let the tears flow. He was so lost in his own head that he hadn't noticed she had entered the room. She took the bottle from his hands, pushed him down on the bed and covered his naked body and lay down beside him. She took him in her arms and whispered softly in his ear:
"It's okay Alexander, I'm here for you. I'm not leaving you, ever again! you're home with me."
He clung to her as if she were the life preserver that could save his life and with that the dam of pain and sorrow broke. He buried his head against her chest, held her tightly and cried and cried until he fell asleep.