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Chapter 4 - Chapter 4: When Divine Latrines Attract Dragons

The System's alarm blared as Leon inspected the Celestial Vault's third layer—a glowing cave filled with mountains of "junk" he'd accumulated over a decade.

*"Warning! Dragon's Breath contamination detected. Suggested solution: Purchase [Dragon Taming for Dummies] (Now 50% off! Limited offer!)."*

Leon tossed the alert aside. "I'll stick to my methods." He grabbed a **[Divine Pest Control Spray]** he'd gotten for killing mine rats and spritzed the air.

The mist coalesced into golden runes. A deafening roar shook the vault.

**"WHO DARES PURIFY MY ESSENCE WITH… *LAVENDER SCENT*?!"**

A woman materialized, her crimson scales shimmering under twin dragon horns. Her claws gripped a toilet seat—the very one Leon had installed in the mines.

"You!" She hurled the seat at him. "Used my shed scales as *toilet paper*?!"

Leon ducked. "Wait, those glittery rocks were *dragon scales*?"

The dragoness's tail smashed a treasure pile. "I am Ignisia, last heir of the Primordial Flame Dragons! My scales are meant for forging godslayer armors, not—"

*Crunch.*

She froze. Leon was nibbling a scale like a potato chip. "Tastes like barbecue. Want some?" He offered a **[Dragon-Spiced Roast Chicken]** from his inventory.

Ignisia's stomach growled. "T-This is beneath me!" She snatched the chicken. "But wasting food is a mortal sin!"

As she devoured the meal, the System pinged:

*"Ding! Dragonkin affinity +10. Unlocked [Fireproof Toilet Paper] recipe. Market demand forecast: 300% profit!"*

"Enough games!" Ignisia's claws ignited. "I demand vengeance for—"

*Boom!*

The vault trembled. Saintess Elara's voice echoed through a rift: "Leon! The trial grounds are under attack by shadow wyrms!"

Ignisia perked up. "Wyrms? Those overgrown earthworms?" She cracked her knuckles. "I'll handle this. No one steals *my* prey!"

Leon tossed her a **[Rusty Pitchfork]**. "Use this. Good for barbecue skewers too."

The dragoness stared at the farm tool. "You insult me! I am a Primal Dra—"

*Whoosh!*

Leon activated the pitchfork's hidden function. Crimson flames engulfed it, morphing into a **Dragonrend Spear**.

Ignisia's eyes widened. "The lost weapon of the First Flame Emperor?!"

"Nah." Leon shrugged. "Mine's a knockoff. The real one's propping up my tomato plants."

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