Silke blinked at the sudden demand, his fingers still lightly cradling Seram's face. His gaze softened, and he exhaled slowly, as if weighing the consequences of truth.
"No" he said, voice low. "I don't say this to everyone. I've never said this to anyone."
Seram didn't flinch, but his breath hitched.
His eyes searched Silke's, but the older man didn't look away.
Silke's thumb brushed lightly across Seram's cheekbone. "You want something I've never told anyone?"
"…Yeah."
Silke stepped back, just a little. The touch disappeared, but the weight of his words lingered in the air between them.
He turned, leaned both palms against the counter, staring down at the untouched plates for a long beat before speaking.
"When I lost my last partner, I stopped guiding for a while. I told the guild I needed time to recover. That was a lie. I didn't want to guide anymore. I thought maybe I'd broken something in them. I told myself if I hadn't been their partner, they might still be alive."
Seram's mouth parted slightly, but he didn't speak. He just watched the tension in Silke's shoulders, how his fingers curled against the countertop like he was bracing for impact.
"I've spent a long time pretending I don't need anyone. That I'm whole by myself. But the truth is…"
He glanced over his shoulder, voice quiet but steady. "I think I've been waiting for someone like you."
Seram swallowed hard. "Someone like me?"
"Stubborn. Reckless. Impossible to control. But honest. Raw. Real." His eyes returned to Seram's.
"You don't pretend to be okay. You don't hide when you're hurting. And you don't care how people see you as long as you hit your mark."
Seram shifted in his seat, uncomfortable with the praise but unable to look away.
"I thought I'd never want to guide again," Silke continued. "But the moment I saw you losing control, I didn't even hesitate. Something in me just moved."
He looked down again, this time at the matching pajamas, and then chuckled under his breath.
"I guess that's something I haven't told anyone," he added softly.
"That I needed you before I even knew your name."
Silke didn't expect the silence that followed. Not that it was tense or awkward..it was just quiet.
Then, Seram stood up.
His movements were slow, still a little unsteady. But he walked up to Silke and stopped just in front of him, hesitating for a second before lifting his hand and gently tugging at the sleeve of Silke's pajama top.
"You're kind of unfair, you know that?" Seram murmured.
"You say stuff like that now..how I'm supposed to act normal?"
Silke's lips curled faintly. "You've never acted normal a day in your life."
Seram wrapped his Silke's waist, pulling him closer as he whispered into his ears.
"How about we do a little guiding? I can't accept the last one because I wasn't in my right senses.."
Seram smirked, curling Silke's hair… "Now you can show me how guiding works..now that I'm in my right senses."
"…"
"Aren't you supposed to be gay?"
Seram blinked. "What?"
"I mean," Silke said, voice smooth, eyes glinting, "the way you're clinging to me, whispering in my ear, playing with my hair..kind of makes a man wonder."
Seram scoffed, but he didn't let go. "I'm not gay. I've said that before."
"Right." Silke nodded solemnly. "Totally straight. That's why you were burying your face in my neck ten minutes ago, muttering about how I smell sweet."
"I was injured" Seram said, tone defensive, though the pink climbing up his ears betrayed him. "And delirious."
"Mmm. So when you wrapped your arms around me just now and said you wanted to feel what it's like to be guided properly, that was…?"
"Research" Seram said flatly. "Educational purposes."
"Of course."
They stared at each other for a beat.
Seram cleared his throat, still refusing to back down.
"I'm just saying… if I were into men—hypothetically—you'd be a dangerous option."
Silke chuckled under his breath and leaned in slightly, his voice low and amused.
"Good thing it's not hypothetical then."
"…Shut up."
Silke smiled, but didn't push further. Instead, he rested a hand gently on Seram's chest, right over his heart.
"You don't have to label it, you know. What you feel. Who you want."
Seram's gaze flicked down, to the hand, then back up. He didn't move away.
"I have no issue with that. I know exactly what I want right now."
Silke pulled Seram closer "I guess we're guiding tonight."
Seram's answer was wordless, just the way he leaned in, the way his breath warmed the space between them.