Have you ever wondered when did your heart starting to beat for someone else?
I do.
I always go back to 1st grade of primary years, and yes I knew I was too young at that time, but I won't forget the first time this boy made my heart skip its very first beat.
*Lub-Dub
He was a very pale and skinny boy. He's always surrounded with his fellow friends that in my eyes lacks in comparison to him; he has this glow in his face; his smiles and laughter; his uneven dimples from both cheeks; his hazel-nut colored eyes that forms a crescent moon as he giggles; he was perfect in my 7 years old eyes.
"Marie, do you know his name?" I innocently and whisperedly and shyly asked my seatmate while pointing at his direction secretly.
"Erm... Jaxon? yeah. that's Jaxon. Why?"
"Nothing, just asking"
My first crush was Jaxon. His name was Jaxon...
Nothing much happened after that, our classes would resumed and I would continue to glance at Jaxon's seat; I would "accidently" drop something just so I could a reason to turn back; make excuses to go to the comfort room to walk pass his chair; making sure that I've given enough hints for him to know I like him.
He was my motivation at that time, haha yeah it's not the money or anything else that makes me go to school in those days. It was all Jaxon. He was all over my head and I thought that to calm myself down, I should confess my feelings to him.
So, I waited. I don't want to be rejected by a 7 years old, I wanted to make sure that I won't get embarass by our classmates. I was even afraid of the consequences of me confessing. I had such thoughts at the tender age of 7. So I wait.
"Callie, Jaxon wants to talk to you" Marie said.
At this point, I didn't know what to do. Does he know I like him? Do I tell him now? What if he says he don't like me? Will his friends laugh at me for liking him? This is too much stress!!
"Oh, hey Jaxon! Marie said you wanted to talk to me" I thought I was so cool at that time.
"I think I have a crush on you" He said.
*Lub-Dub
*intensifies