"If I died right now, would anyone even notice?"
The thought lingered in Jiang Chen's head as he stared blankly at the flickering fluorescent lights above his desk. His fingers hovered over the keyboard, unmoving, while the office around him was long emptied. A cold cup of instant noodles sat beside him, half-eaten and now soggy beyond repair. His stomach grumbled, but he ignored it. Again.
It was 2:43 AM.
He checked the time not because he cared about sleep—he'd given up on that luxury years ago—but because he needed to know how many more hours he'd be under the thumb of Zhao Ming, the tyrannical department manager with a voice like a constipated goat and the personality of one, too.
"Jiang Chen," Zhao Ming had barked earlier that evening, flinging a stack of reports onto his already full desk, "I need these processed before the sun comes up. If they're not ready by morning, don't bother coming back."
He didn't wait for a response. He never did.
Jiang Chen had only nodded silently, as he always did. That's what everyone expected from him—the office trash, the ugly intern, the guy who wore the same faded shirt every Monday and smelled like cold rice.
But tonight was different.
Not because of the pile of reports. That was normal.
Not because his ex-girlfriend, Lin Yue, was laughing in the hallway with their boss earlier, her head tilted affectionately while her hand "accidentally" touched Zhao Ming's arm.
No, tonight was different because Jiang Chen had finally stopped feeling.
Everything inside him was quiet—like someone had flipped a switch and turned his emotions off.
He returned to his typing, eyes bloodshot and lips dry, until the words on the screen began to blur. His vision flickered. The letters began to float. He blinked. Then blinked again. His fingers trembled, then froze.
And then…
Black.
---
He died.
---
Not with a bang. Not with a scream.
There was no dramatic collapse, no last-minute gasp.
Just a soft thud as his forehead hit the keyboard.
And then—silence.
---
"Initializing... recalibrating host fate..."
A feminine voice echoed through a void that had no shape, no time, and no direction.
Jiang Chen felt like he was floating in warm water, but his body wasn't there. No limbs. No breath. Just his consciousness, drifting.
> "Congratulations, Host Jiang Chen! You have successfully died in the most pitiful and unimpressive way imaginable. System recognizes your achievement: 'Most Tragic Corporate Death – Bronze Tier'."
"…what?" Jiang Chen muttered in the dark.
> "You have been chosen by the Destiny Adjustment System™—a premium reincarnation support tool designed to correct cosmic injustice and award you a second chance at life. Please enjoy your complimentary trial life in the world of Xuanjing!"
The voice was annoyingly cheerful, like a customer service rep that had sniffed one too many rainbow pills.
"Wait, I died?" Jiang Chen tried to shout, but the voice didn't stop.
> "Initiating Soul Transfer. Installing Tutorial Package: 'Trash to Tyrant.' Binding System. Assigning cheat codes... Loading Overpowered Buffs. Applying Ugly-to-Hot Conversion Filter…"
"WHAT FILTER?!"
> "…done. Uploading host to new body in 3… 2… 1…"
---
CRACK!
Jiang Chen jolted awake as his back slammed into something hard and wet. He gasped, coughing up a mouthful of water and pondweed.
The sky above him was a strange shade of purple. Giant birds flew overhead, flapping wings the size of delivery trucks. The trees nearby glowed faintly, and the grass around him shimmered like jade.
He sat up, dripping wet, and stared down at his reflection in the pond. His face was still familiar—sort of. The pimpled cheeks and crooked teeth were gone. His skin looked clearer, his jaw sharper, and—
"WHY ARE MY EYES GOLD?!" he screamed, slapping his cheeks.
> "Relax, Host. That's just the 'Low-Level Heavenly Eyesight' reward. Congratulations on acquiring something you didn't earn!"
A glowing blue screen popped up in front of him. It hovered in the air like a video game HUD:
---
[Destiny Adjustment System Interface]
Host: Jiang Chen
Realm: Trash Level 0 – Mortal Mosquito Sucker
Face Value: 3.5/100 (Pathetic)
Luck: -200 (Cursed by Karma)
Harem Members: 0/6
Shamelessness: 1 (Beginner Level)
Current Quest:
Slap a Young Master
Reward: +5 Face Value, +1 Basic Qi Circulation Manual
---
"…this is insane," Jiang Chen whispered, blinking at the floating screen.
A rustle came from the trees nearby.
From the bushes stepped a boy wearing silk robes and an arrogant smirk that could punch a god in the face. Two goons followed behind him, carrying a glowing sword and a fruit basket.
"You there," the robed boy said, "what trash sect did you crawl out of?"
Jiang Chen slowly stood up, the screen in front of him still glowing. He read the quest again. His lips curled.
This world was insane.
It had birds the size of cars, glowing grass, and some kind of mystical spreadsheet following him around. And it wanted him to slap this arrogant peacock?
He could do that.
"Oh no," Jiang Chen muttered dramatically, "I must've tripped and accidentally raised my hand—"
SMACK!
His palm collided with the young master's cheek so hard, the boy spun a full circle before falling flat into the pond.
> "Quest Completed: Slap a Young Master!"
Reward Granted: +5 Face Value, +1 Basic Qi Circulation Manual
New Title Unlocked: "Face-Slapping Newbie"
"AAAAHHHH!" the young master screamed from the pond, spitting lotus petals.
Jiang Chen stared at his hand.
That… felt good.
No. That felt amazing.
He looked at the two goons.
"What are you staring at?" he said. "Want a turn?"
They ran.
Jiang Chen watched the two goons scurry off into the distance. The young master, still sputtering in the pond, looked like he was having a meltdown. His robe was soaked, his pride shattered, and Jiang Chen had barely even broken a sweat.
"Man," Jiang Chen muttered, looking at his glowing hand, "this system is awesome. I like this."
A familiar ding rang in his ears.
> "New Quest Available: "Make a Name for Yourself in Xuanjing!"
Objective: Defeat a weakling in combat. Bonus points if you make him cry. Reward: +10 Face Value, New Skill: 'Wind Slash'."
Jiang Chen tilted his head at the new quest, a smirk curling onto his face. It was already starting. The system was delivering. And as it seemed, weakling combat was right up his alley.
He wasn't a martial artist by any means, but he was good at slapping people—at least, now he was. That's all that mattered.
He glanced back at the pathetic young master, who was still clutching his robe, now half-drowned in the pond. His face was a mess of tears and lotus leaves.
"You!" the young master screamed, pointing at him, "You're going to pay for this! My father is the Grand Elder of the Flying Feather Sect! You won't escape this!"
Jiang Chen blinked, processing the words. "The… Flying Feather Sect?"
The boy, still sputtering, began to crawl toward the shore. His eyes burned with anger, but there was something else behind them—a fear he didn't quite expect. He looked like a paper tiger—a shrieking mess desperate to appear bigger than he was.
Jiang Chen's screen blinked again, and he glanced at it, grinning.
[New Quest Alert!]
Title: Flying Feather Slap Boss
Objective: Defeat the Young Master of the Flying Feather Sect in single combat. Reward: 50 Face Value, 1 Mystical Treasure Chest, +5 to Harem Affection (Special reward if done in a slap fight).
"Slap fight?" Jiang Chen chuckled. "Well, if that's what they want, who am I to disappoint?"
"Your father?" Jiang Chen sneered, crouching down to get closer to the young master. "He must be so proud right now. His son—defeated by a nobody like me." He smiled wickedly. "Don't worry. I'm sure he'll be even prouder when I slap your pretty little face off again."
The young master's expression shifted from rage to confusion, then to terror. The words Jiang Chen spoke seemed to be sinking in.
"Y-You… you can't… You're just a low-level trash cultivator," the young master stammered, his voice trembling. "My father's sect will—"
Jiang Chen didn't let him finish.
SMACK!
The young master's head jerked back so violently that it left a small trail of water behind him. The wet slap echoed like a thunderclap in the eerie silence of the mystical forest. His goons, who had already run off, were probably still hearing the echo as they bolted in fear.
Jiang Chen stared at his hand again, a satisfied smile spreading across his face. He had never felt so powerful in his life. If this was what dying and reincarnating was like, he might just consider doing it again sometime.
> "Quest Complete! Bonus Quest Triggered: 'Make the Young Master Cry (Complete)'."
Reward: +10 Face Value, +5 Shamelessness, +2 Harem Affection Points, 1 Level-Up Point for Slap Skill.
Jiang Chen took a deep breath and stretched, feeling the energy inside him. His chest felt lighter—stronger even. His system was giving him more power with every slap. What an easy way to level up. This was better than any overtime he had ever done at that miserable company.
The young master whimpered from the ground, now holding his red face in both hands. His eyes were filled with both rage and humiliation. Jiang Chen wasn't sure if he was crying, but he certainly looked like it.
"Get up," Jiang Chen said with a smirk, offering the boy his hand—only to immediately pull it away the moment the young master reached for it. He couldn't help himself. This was too good.
The boy's face turned an even deeper shade of red as he slowly stood, his expression twitching from the humiliation. He opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. It was like the slap had knocked all sense out of him.
"Now, get lost," Jiang Chen said. "Before I make your sect famous for producing the most useless trash cultivators in Xuanjing."
---
The young master glared at him one last time before stumbling away, retreating into the night with his tail tucked between his legs. Jiang Chen didn't even bother watching him leave. He just sat down on a nearby stone and pulled out his cup of cold noodles. The mystical forest around him felt oddly quiet, the only sound now being the distant croak of some weird animal.
Jiang Chen chuckled to himself, stirring the noodles absently.
"Not bad," he muttered between slurps. "Not bad at all."
Suddenly, the screen in front of him flickered again, and a new message popped up.
> "Congratulations! You've unlocked your first 'Harem Affection Points.'"
Jiang Chen stared at the words, blinking. He knew that wasn't a mistake. He had been so caught up in the chaos that he had almost forgotten about the harem aspect.
"What the hell?" he muttered, leaning closer. "I'm not even sure what's happening in this world, and I'm already getting points for making people love me? How the hell does that even work?"
But before he could ponder it further, another screen appeared, this time with a very familiar, and slightly strange, message.
> "Harem Member: Ice Princess – First Impression: Negative. Recommended Action: Impress with Slaps (Optional: Pursue with Flowers)."
Jiang Chen's eyes widened. The "Ice Princess" sounded suspiciously like the mysterious woman he had seen lurking around earlier—a cold beauty with the air of someone who definitely didn't belong in a place like this.
He quickly dismissed the window.
"Great. I'm already collecting ladies like Pokémon."
Jiang Chen sat back on the rock, chewing the last of his cold noodles and still processing the strange new world around him. His mind kept returning to the flashing system screens and the strange quest rewards he had received. It was all so absurd, but somehow, it felt… right. For once, Jiang Chen was in control.
"Alright," he said aloud, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, "what's next? Slap more guys around? Impress some princess? Maybe I'll run into a dragon next."
As if answering his question, the forest suddenly stirred. A rustling sound came from the bushes, followed by the unmistakable thump of something heavy hitting the ground. Jiang Chen immediately stood up, his hand instinctively going to the system interface to check his quest log.
> New Quest Available:
Protect a Weakling from a Dangerous Beast.
Reward: +15 Face Value, 1 Dragon's Scale, +3 Shamelessness Points.
The word "dragon" caught his attention. He couldn't help but grin.
"Okay, maybe this world isn't so bad after all," he muttered to himself as he drew closer to the source of the noise.
The bushes parted, and out stepped a small creature—a goblin by the looks of it. It was about half his size, covered in greenish, wrinkled skin, and wearing a torn sackcloth vest. In its hand, it clutched a rusted spear, trembling as it stared at him with wide, terrified eyes.
Jiang Chen blinked.
"What the hell is this?" he asked aloud, his gaze sweeping over the goblin's shabby appearance. The goblin, however, did not seem interested in explaining itself. It screamed at the top of its lungs, throwing itself at Jiang Chen's feet and cowering in terror.
"Help me!" the goblin cried in a high-pitched voice. "The beast! It's coming! Please save me!"
Jiang Chen's eyebrow twitched. The system's quest appeared to be real, but it wasn't quite what he had expected. He glanced at the quest objective.
"Protect a Weakling from a Dangerous Beast."
Dangerous beast? Goblins were already terrifying enough—at least in his previous life, where they were just comic relief in fantasy games. But here, in this new world, they felt more pathetic than threatening.
"You… want me to save you?" Jiang Chen said with a raised eyebrow, looking down at the goblin. "From what? A squirrel?"
The goblin seemed to freeze, staring at him in horror. "It's not a squirrel! It's—"
Before it could finish, the ground trembled beneath their feet. The trees around them shook violently as something large and heavy moved through the forest, snapping branches in its wake.
What the hell is that?
Jiang Chen's hand went instinctively to his side, but he realized there was no weapon there. Instead, the system had given him nothing but his bare fists. He smirked.
"Well, guess I'll have to make do with slapping this beast too."
The goblin's voice quivered. "It's the Mountain-Devouring Bear! It's enormous and… and it devours everything in its path!"
Before Jiang Chen could reply, a massive roar shattered the air. The ground shook violently, and out of the trees charged a gigantic bear-like creature, its fur matted and thick with dirt. It was easily ten feet tall, with fangs like daggers and claws that could tear through steel. Its eyes were bloodshot, and it bellowed in fury as it spotted the two of them.
Jiang Chen's eyes widened.
Now that was a beast.
"Shit," he muttered under his breath, glancing back at the goblin, who was now frantically shaking and pointing at the bear.
"What now?!" Jiang Chen said, his voice tinged with panic.
The goblin screamed.
Without thinking, Jiang Chen charged forward. There was a strange sense of calm that washed over him as the Mountain-Devouring Bear barreled toward him. He wasn't just acting out of instinct; there was something guiding him—an unnatural confidence that seemed to be growing with every step he took. His body began to heat up, and a strange energy surged within him.
"Alright, let's do this!" he roared, leaping into the air.
The bear swung its massive claw at him, but Jiang Chen sidestepped with unexpected agility, his body moving almost on its own. He slid to the side and dashed straight for the bear's exposed side.
SLAP!
He slapped the bear right across the face, hard enough to make it stumble.
The world seemed to freeze for a moment as Jiang Chen stared in disbelief at his own hand. The bear stood still for a second, then let out a growl that reverberated through the forest, before turning back to Jiang Chen with a murderous glint in its eyes.
The goblin was now laughing in the background, but the sound was more of a nervous giggle.
"Oh, this is good," Jiang Chen muttered, cracking his knuckles. "I'm a beast-slayer now."
The bear roared, charging toward him, its enormous form thundering through the trees. Jiang Chen raised his hand again, but this time, the energy around him was different. Something was crackling in the air, like the world itself was holding its breath.
He slapped again.
BOOM!
The bear was knocked back several feet, crashing into a tree that splintered under the impact. The bear staggered, dazed from the force of the slap. Jiang Chen stood there, still in shock at the absurdity of it all.
> "Quest Complete: Protect the Weakling from the Dangerous Beast."
Reward: +15 Face Value, 1 Dragon's Scale, +3 Shamelessness Points.
New Skill Unlocked: 'Wind Slash' (Basic) – Can cut through weak targets with a wave of the hand. (Upgrade Available.)
Jiang Chen looked at the flashing quest reward. He could hardly believe it. He had just slapped a bear into submission. And with no weapon! Just his hands!
The goblin was beside himself with joy, jumping up and down in excitement.
"Did you see that? Did you see that?! You slapped the Mountain-Devouring Bear! You—You're amazing! You're a genius!" The goblin was practically hyperventilating.
Jiang Chen waved him off. "It was nothing. Just had to teach that beast a lesson about not attacking people." He grinned, then looked back at the system's prompt. "Wind Slash, huh? Guess I'm starting to collect some serious skills."
The goblin stared at him in awe. "Please, sir! You must come with me to my village! We'll make you our hero! I'll even give you all the free food you want!"
"Free food?" Jiang Chen's stomach growled at the thought. "Alright, fine. Lead the way. But you better not be trying to trick me into eating some weird goblin stew."
The goblin looked at him with wide, earnest eyes. "I swear! It's totally normal food! No goblin guts or anything, I promise!"
Jiang Chen sighed in resignation. "Fine, fine. Lead the way."
As the goblin began to bounce off toward his village, Jiang Chen glanced around the forest. The bear was likely too wounded to cause any more trouble, but this world… this was going to be a wild ride.