"Hardly ever imagined."
Those are the only words that come to mind, even now. That I'm able to witness this scenery, not just in passing-but from within. The evergreen trees swaying their branches so gently nearby, the warm spring breeze brushing against my cheeks like an old friend's hand, the way the sunlight sparkles between leaves and petals.
Children's laughter rings in the air, bubbling like a stream over smooth stones. Families around us, lounging on picnic mats, chasing toddlers through flowerbeds, feeding crumbs to chirping birds.
I just can't help but smile ear to ear.
"What makes you smile, dear?"
Her voice-soft and crystalline-brings me back to earth. She leans her head on my shoulder, her warmth pressing through the thin fabric of my shirt. I turn to her, the dearest person beside me right now, with the warmest smile I've ever seen.
What could you say if you saw this kind of phenomenon right before your eyes?
Speechless, you might think.
Same here.
Her bright red hair dances with the wind, strands glowing like threads of fire kissed by sunlight. Her emerald eyes catch the light in such a way that they almost seem to glow like two little galaxies looking right through me.
"I just..." I pause, smiling at her, eyes tracing every detail of her face. "I just can't imagine I'm here. With you. Seeing all of this. The families, the colors, the wind. It's too vivid. Too alive."
I breathe in, letting the fragrance of the spring flowers fill my chest. Daffodils, lilies, a hint of fresh grass, and wild lavender. I exhale slowly. "Might be cliché to say this, but it's just too unimaginably mesmerizing to see you, my beautiful wife, standing in the midst of it all. It's... just dreamlike."
She turns away with her cheeks burning red---like a cherry tomato ripened under the sun---and pinches my cheek with mock annoyance. "See? Not a dream, right?"
I laugh, brushing my fingers across her hand before kissing the knuckle. "You're right."
We lay out the mat, shaking it gently before spreading it over the sun-dappled grass. The woven checkered fabric flutters slightly with the breeze. She sets down the wooden picnic basket-our humble treasure chest-and begins taking out the dishes.
We place everything carefully, almost ceremonially: the sandwiches we made together that morning, the rice balls wrapped by her with love and probably a bit too much salt, *chuckles* her favorite peach-flavored tea, and even the strawberry jam cookies we somehow didn't burn this time.
We help ourselves to the food, her laughter bright as she tries to feed me an onigiri shaped like a bear's head. It's messy, clumsy, and perfect. We eat, we laugh, and we let the time slow down with the wind.
There's a quiet moment where neither of us says anything. We just sit there, soaking it this impossible calm, this sunlight-heavy peace.
Dreamlike, I think again.
If I hadn't broken out of that cage one year ago, this would have stayed a dream. A fantasy too fragile to touch. If I hadn't taken that one terrifying step to change everything, I wouldn't be here.
With her.
This would be nothing more than a cruel mirage.
Back then...
No. Not now. I promised.
Still, even promises can't always silence the ghosts.
She must have seen it in my face. Rosé looks up at me, her brows furrowing, concern flashing through her emerald eyes. "Geez," she huffs, puffing her cheeks with an exaggerated pout.
"Didn't we have an agreement? No gloomy thoughts while we travel. Especially not during picnics. That was Rule Number One!"
Stunned by her sudden protest, I blink and then burst out laughing.
"Why are you laughing now, dear?" she bickers, eyes narrowed.
"You're just unfairly adorable, Rosé." I continued giggling happily.
She blushes deeper, crossing her arms, pretending to sulk. "Flattery won't save you, mister."
But I can't stop smiling. Her energy, her warmth-it anchors me. I lean back on my elbows and sigh.
"No, I'm fine, Roze," I say, softer this time. "I was just wondering... would this have happened if I hadn't made the choice back then? If I'd let myself stay in that life?"
She doesn't answer immediately. She turns, looking out toward the lake in the distance where sunlight sparkles on the ripples like scattered gold. A few ducks quack gently. In the far corner of the park, a boy chases a kite with his parents laughing behind him.
"I probably won't ever know the answer to that," she finally says. "But I can assure you, I'm very, very grateful you did."
Her fingers find mine. She squeezes gently. I look into her eyes-those eyes that once opened in a lab, staring at the world for the first time, programmed to obey, to adapt, to serve. But not anymore. Not now.
"I'm not going to say I was brave," I murmur. "I was desperate. And terrified."
"Still," she says, leaning in, "You did it. Even if your hands were shaking."
We hold each other close. A quiet kiss, long and tender, like two pieces that finally remembered where they belonged.
The wind rustles the trees above us like nature whispering a lullaby. Time slows again. The world, once so cruel and sharp-edged, feels gentle. It wraps around us like a blanket warmed by the sun.
This question-Would it all have happened if I hadn't changed?-echoes inside me, maybe forever. A thousand what-ifs, a hundred missed chances, but only one road that brought me here.
And I wouldn't trade this view, this day, this woman beside me, for anything. Rosé smiles and leans against my side, taking a bite of her cookie. Crumbs scatter on the mat.
"Hey," she says suddenly, turning to me with a mischievous grin, "next time we do this, let's find a place with a field of sunflowers. A sea of them. Like that painting you showed me once."
I chuckle. "Like Van Gogh?"
She shrugs. "I just want to see if it makes you cry like the last time."
"I did not cry." I denied
She playfully said, "You totally did."
"Okay, maybe a little." I got to admit.
We both laugh. And as like world laughs along with us.
Chapter End.