I'm Calling B******* on "Don't Lean on Your Kids"
They say you shouldn't lean on your kids. But honestly, who else is supposed to keep you going when life keeps throwing punches?
For me, my kids aren't just my responsibility; they're my motivation, my hope, and sometimes the only light I see at the end of a dark tunnel. So yeah, I lean on them—not to carry my burdens, but to remind me why I fight so hard to survive. And I'm not ashamed to admit it.
But here's where I'm calling b*******. People love to act like "Perfect Pam" or "Say It Isn't So Susie," sitting on their high horses, pretending they've never needed anyone or anything to get through tough times. They're quick to point fingers and whisper, as if being an emotional person—especially after everything I've been through—is some kind of moral failing.
Here's the truth: being open about your emotions, and finding strength in your love for your kids, isn't weakness. It's survival. It's real. And it's a hell of a lot more honest than pretending to have it all together while falling apart inside.
The thing is, kids aren't immune to the pressure, either. They pick up on society's impossible standards. They hear the whispers, see the side-eyes, and absorb the idea that if their parents lean on them for strength, something must be "wrong" at home. They start to wonder if they're being failed, or if their family is somehow less than the "perfect" ones they see on TV and social media.
Kids are smart. They notice when adults talk about "healthy boundaries" and "not burdening your kids," and sometimes they internalize the idea that if their parent is struggling, it's a problem that needs fixing—or worse, that it's their fault. Society tells them their parents should be superheroes, never sad, never tired, never in need of support. So when real life doesn't match up, kids can feel confused, guilty, or even ashamed.
But here's what I believe: being honest with your kids about your struggles, and showing them it's okay to lean on each other as a family, can actually make them stronger and more compassionate. It teaches them that it's normal to have hard days, and that love means supporting each other, not pretending everything is perfect.
So maybe it's time we stop performing for "Perfect Pam" and "Say It Isn't So Susie," and start showing our kids that real families aren't flawless—they're just real. And that's more than enough.