Ethan is the one who starts out this chapter and is probably going to be the main character of this chapter. Truth be told, I don't like Lizmarie Mateo Rouberto. Andrew hates her, Caleb loves her and hasn't been fronting that much. She's emotionally neglectful and is the type of person to make you think she's a good friend who can be there for you then will push you on later on. That's the type of person she is truth be told.
For the same reason, it's also why a lot of people dislike her. It's best to not get attached to her because she really will push you away the moment you try to get close to her. She has a fear of abandonment, she will abandon you first just so she doesn't get abandoned. She's selfish and that's just the type of person she is. She's also a very sweet and caring person though.
It was June 20th, and I felt very tired today. I only ended up smoking two cigarettes and didn't feel like walking yet I still went out and walked to smoke my first cigarette. I didn't shower and skipped dinner time despite my grandma making dinner for me. I went to the wuthering waves event where it was about the Startorch Academy. There were many Startorch cosplayers there including both male and female rover, Aemeath, Lynae, and many more.
It was a fun short event for me personally, there were 6 games in which I brought the tickets for $5. I played all 6 games and got an Aemeath print art at the end for completing all the games. I also got a sticker as a reward for playing each game too. Then I went home and decided to give a cigarette to a guy and smoked a cigarette myself. I only smoked two cigarettes yesterday which was a good improvement of not being addicted to smoking after all.
Then on June 21st, I woke up and took a shower and did my morning routine. I also decided to play Bed Wars on Roblox. I decided to equip the tree kit and that kit allows you to not be able to wear armor since you would have a lot of health. I ended up mostly gathering diamonds and emeralds to upgrade the team tiers and to save up to get a bow gun. We failed to defeat the first Titan but when it was just us pink team vs the blue team, I decided to slay the Titan for the team to get buffs.
We defeated all the blue team members except for one. He put out an electricity defense mechanism in hopes of defeating us with it. I wasn't going to let that slide however. He was stuck in some low level place of his team's palace where we couldn't reach him with a sword. To counter against that, I decided to walk to a place where I could shoot a fireball at him. Since he was one block from falling, the fireball forced him to bounce off where he was standing and he fell off. Thanks to my counter attack and quick thinking, the pink team won!
After a while, I decided to ride the bus to Marius' birthday party event. He was a character from the game called Tears of Themis. I was excited for this event today, my mom didn't realize that I would be going and thought I was going to go with them for lunch and to the Japanese Garden to walk around.
I smoked my first cigarette at 11:47am which was later than usual since I decided to not take a walk this morning. A fly landed on my arm as I was sitting down and smoking. I moved my arm quickly so the fly would go away and it did. I saw a Sirgid robot doing its job and delivering food services. I saw buses pass by but none of them were the bus I needed, which was the metro bus of 460. My bus would come at 12:09pm and in the meantime I would smoke while waiting for it.
I would inhale for quite a while then exhale for a long ish time. That was how I smoked this cigarette today to feel its nicotine effects. A man was speaking to me and asked for a cigarette so I gave him one and $10 to buy himself a subway combo that costed $6. Ah fuck, I was busy buying a $3 pepsi bottle in a store that I missed my 460 bus, I knew I was going to be late but I didn't want to miss out on the event as much as possible.
I decided to smoke a second cigarette because I missed my 460 bus. I am so cooked. I sat on the dirty looking green buses that are common in Los Angeles. I could feel my mind becoming numb as I smoked the cigarette. A lady was shouting something but I was busy listening to World by Seventeen using my broken headphones that I couldn't make out clearly what she was saying.
The cars were passing by, the wind was blowing quite strong today. I saw most people getting on the 950 gray metro bus. Ah shit, Ethan forgot his extendable charger and left it at home. Thankfully, he brought his 'Lord of the Mysteries' book to read if his phone was in trouble.
Ethan transforms into the Demon King of Liberation and pulls out the sword of Seraph Yuu. He holds it against Dante's neck and cuts her head off after having a flashback to her words. It annoyed him so he decided to kill Dante off in this book himself. The Xhao Zuozhe Company would just kill everyone who abandoned or rejected them. There was no justification for it but isn't that the natural human nature?
Perhaps I shouldn't have smoked a third cigarette because it tasted awful and my family was coming soon. This would be the final time that I smoked for today, I don't even feel like shit and everything went smoothly today. Ashes scattered as I bounced it on the wall. When the cigarette burned near the yellow light, I stepped on it.
Now I am high on nicotine after smoking. I could feel the dizziness already. I finally got the courage to ask Sebastian what his sexuality was. He told me he was straight and I felt romantically rejected considering I was a bit into him. This was before I got myself a boyfriend. It hurt a bit but I was okay with it because it was unintentional and he was a cool dude after all.
I got reminders of Slyius Xavier and remembered that he called me immature. I was genuinely struggling a lot and he had the audacity to call me immature and exhausting. If I was the first to break him then I will simply break him until he begs for mercy. Ethan took a pistol out and aimed it right for Slyius' head. Slyius stood still as his typical reaction would be when being pointed at a gun. Just as he was about to turn around, Ethan immediately shot him in the head. After all, in every round, the Xhao Zuozhe company would kill Slyius Xavier.
I was playing minecraft and while I was mining, I came across this strange light blue place. It had copper blocks and spawned monsters where they could float and attack you. I ended up dying by one of those monsters. Which caused me to have to go back to the same place and pick up all my stuff and never return there again.
Later on, I went to the doctor's appointment and had to walk through hell to get to my bus stop. I also tried to smoke a cigarette but lighting it up took a lot of tries since the wind kept blowing the fire out. After being done with the doctor's appointment, my dad dropped me off back home and I packed my luggage and things in my backpack. Then put the things in my dad's car and we headed to his house which would take an hour to get there.
I was reading an Andy x Leyley fanfiction on reddit in silence while my dad was driving the car with music turned on. I was learning how to write better since I didn't have good vocabulary. It felt like I was obtaining more content to the Andy x Leyley story game after needing to wait for more episodes of that game. I liked how there were a variety of routes that allowed the two characters to choose different endings.
The game that had the most diverse endings and choices was Detroit: Become Human though. There were major endings sure but the choices in what could occur seemed endless when I saw Youtube videos of that game.
I gazed at my dad smoking in his car and lowering the car window. I was stunned to see him do that truth be told. The smoke would definitely get in the car via third hand degree smoking. I wondered to myself if he even knew that he could give third hand smoke to his kids who would later be seated in this car. I didn't mind experiencing second hand smoke since I smoked myself. I was worried about my siblings though.
I would have liked to write a story where Lizmarie and I meet again and we live happily ever after but life isn't always like that. I'm writing my own story because I don't know where it will go. Some stories are tragedies and this story is definitely just countless amounts of tragedies. I don't even know if the person I'm writing this for will ever read this. She said she didn't like tragedies after all and unfortunately my life is a tragedy as a borderline regressor.
Life felt more alive when I looked at my window outside with it rolled down. I smoked a Marlboro NXT and it tasted pretty terrible. That was my second cigarette of the day. I honestly preferred smoking American Spirit. Both tasted terrible though and I wished I could have a vanilla soft serve.
Ah, I wish to go to my father's house already. I'm quite hungry. I ate chicken with sauce, rice, eggs, and vegetables. I also ate Butter Pecan ice cream later on and then proceeded to head to sleep. However I woke up twice with the first time being at 10:58pm and the second time being at 3:08am. I ended up reading 'I became a Married Man in Another World' manhwa and it was pretty entertaining.
I don't even know why I smoke these days, the craving for a cigarette is always there though. It smells bad, it leaves a smell on your clothes. It tastes bad too sometimes. I guess smoking once per day isn't too bad compared to some folks smoking 4-5 times per day. The Marlboro NXT I smoked yesterday tasted quite strong and awful. American Spirit at least is less intense and doesn't taste much.
To justify to myself why I smoke, I decided to google up the benefits of smoking. Turns out that there are indeed some benefits to smoking after all despite society saying that it has terrible long term health effects. Benefits include stress relief which is what I do. Social bonding which I understand. There were more and from what I researched, it had antidepressant properties, neuroprotective properties, and increased neurotransmitters. At least my dad was more chill with me smoking since he smoked himself compared to my mom who didn't like the smell.