CyberPunk: Low-Life, High Tech
"Greetings, chromed crusaders and organic oddities!
Welcome to Night City—where the neon’s brighter than your future, the smog’s 40% carcinogens and 60% shattered dreams, and your survival strategy boils down to evading landlords and lead poisoning.
Corporations? They’re auctioning your aspirations at a 300% markup—conveniently bundled with lifetime debt! Gangs? Hosting turf wars like community theater—tonight’s performance: Kabuki Carnage (sponsored by Maelstrom™). And Trauma Team? Let’s just say their motto’s ‘Resuscitation Pending’—pending your premium tier, of course.
Strap on your subdermal armor, choke down that soy-paste ‘gourmet’ experience, and cross your fingers your neuralware doesn’t critical error during today’s mandatory firefight. Spoiler alert: it will.
Tune in for updates, tune out the screams, or get systematically optimized—your obituary airs right after these messages. Stan out!”
Translation Note:
Now, listen up, choombas—this here’s a fresh take on "赛博朋克: 2075" from Qidian, a’right?
Big shouts to SrMagnus for thier killer version, Cyberpunk: The Relentless (seriously, go read it—preem stuff).
But I figured the ol’ girl could use a bit more ripperdoc grit in her veins, yeah? More scalpels, more synth-leather creak, more of that "oh-shite-my-spleen’s-out" charm Night City’s famous for. Sláinte to the OG, and here’s to bleedin’ new edges on the blade.
And hey - if you've got thoughts, toss 'em my way. Feedback's always welcome, long as it's not written in bullet holes.... or soya milk, that shite just tastes wrong.
[Cover art is not my own—just borrowing it for the ride. Original artist, if you’re out there and want it pulled, shoot me a message and consider it done. No drama, just professional courtesy. Cheers!]