Igris Biship
"—And you know better!" My mother's voice tore through the air.
My mother had been tearing into me from the moment I walked through the door, lecturing me about responsibility, safety, and the consequences of my actions. Each word makes me feel all the more guilty.
It felt weird… I just wanted to help. I wanted to test what the next stage of my core was capable of—and above all else, I wanted to make sure Alice was alright.
"How could you think it was okay to go out without telling anyone?" she demanded, her voice rising. "Do you have any idea how worried I was?"
I stood there, shoulders slumped, staring at the floor as her words washed over me. The truth was, I had thought about the risks, but Alice... I just couldn't disappoint her, and that thought had drowned out my better judgment. "I just wanted to… prove myself," I muttered, barely above a whisper.
"Prove yourself?" she echoed, disbelief etched across her face. "By putting yourself in danger? By risking your life? That's not bravery; that's recklessness!"
I wanted to defend myself, but everything she said rang true, so I remained silent, too ashamed to utter a single word.
"Well, let's not be too harsh on the boy," my father interjected, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. "So, Igris…"
Father looked serious, his face begging a question. "Did you manage to kill the beast?" His demeanor remained firm.
My mother turned to my father, deadpan. "Out of everything you could have asked, you chose this?"
Father nodded, undeterred. "Now, did you?"
"Yes—"
"Yeah!" He boomed, shooting up from his chair, hand outstretched for a high-five. But with my mother's piercing gaze fixed on us, I couldn't return his gesture.
My sister, sitting in the corner, giggled—she had been laughing at me throughout the entire conversation.
"Honey!" Father quickly sat back down, his body stiffening. "But! Your mother is right; what you did was a little foolish."
My mother sighed, her expression softening. "You really are just like your father, and I don't know if that's going to be a good or bad thing." Father nodded in acceptance.
He placed a hand on her leg as if to offer comfort. "I'm sure it's a great thing."
"Yeah, I just want Igris to be careful. Things out there can be very dangerous, and he means everything to me—us—so I just need him to be more thoughtful." My mother laid her hand on top of his.
Their love felt like a warm blanket, but it also added to the weight of their worry pressing down on me, a feeling of shame clung to my chest.
My mother turned to me, her gaze thoughtful. 'Your actions affect all of us. There are others who care about you—your sister, Stella, your father, and me.
"I didn't mean to worry anyone, I just wanted to make sure she would be alright." Alongside my own desire for testing my core, I thought to myself.
"Make sure she'll be alright," my father recited my words, nodding his head with a faint smile. "Sounds familiar. There was a lady I did this for before, and if I do say so myself, I was her knight in shining armor."
My mother nudged him playfully, raising an eyebrow. "And who was that lady?"
"As the stories go, the lady usually falls for the very handsome knight."
Asuna piped up, grinning mischievously. "So does that mean Igris is going to rescue a princess next? Igris, save me too!" She struck a dramatic pose, hands on her hips, and threw back her head in laughter.
My mother's gaze softened further. "Just remember, Igris, no matter what you do, be careful."
"I will."
An extreme wave of nausea washed over me, making my body feel heavy as lead.
I needed this conversation to end quickly, "Uh, I'm a little worn out. Could I go lay down?" I asked, trying to mask my own concern.
My mother's face flashed with a hint of worry, her brow furrowing slightly, but it seemed she hadn't caught on. "Of course, sweetheart."
I left, making my way to my room, each step feeling heavier than the last. Once I closed the door behind me, I leaned against it, taking a moment to breathe—then suddenly, a voice rang dully in my head.
"Boy…"