I woke up late this morning and had to scramble around to get dressed before Kai ditched me. I can't wait to start driving. I have my permit already and I am just waiting on dad to take me to the DMV. I have to re-learn the rules as this countries driving rules are different and we drive on opposite sides of the road. Kai knocked on my door snapping me out of my thoughts."Audra? Are you almost ready?" He asks. "Almost." I say back. I rush to put on a jacket and my boots and swiftly pull open the door. Kai is stood there with my lunch. "Ready?" I nod and we head downstairs. We are out the door and into the truck in no time. He pulls out the drive and about 20 minutes later we arrive at my school. "Okay Adura, dad wanted me to remind you that you have an appointment. It's a 10 minute walk from here. I'd pick you up but I have a job interview at 3 in the city." He says handing me my lunch and backpack. I nod, "Thank you, Good luck with your interview." I say smiling. He nods his head and drives off. I turn and face the school, my anxiety building in my stomach. I try to shake away the nerves. Come on Audra. This is not your first day. I put on a determined look. My goal is to make one friend. It doesn't even have to be a best friend, just someone I can talk to in class. I head towards the entrance and head to my first class. I take my seat in the back and pull out the book we are reading and my notes. I play on my phone until the teacher walks in and starts the class. We read quietly and did independent practice for most of the period. Once that class was over, I headed over to the science building. I was in advanced biology so we had a mix of seniors in the class to. I sit down in my usual seat but today I noticed a girl sitting across from me in the typically empty seat. She had long straight brown hair and soft blue eyes. Her lush lips pulled into a smile as I sat down. She waved excitedly at me, "Hey, Audra right?" She asks. I nod yes and she continues. "I'm Isla, were doing desk partners today so I figured I could come over here and be your partner for today?" She asks. "That would be great." I say excitedly. This is the first time anyone has come over to me. Everytime I try to interact, people always ask to many questions about my mom. It's like I've been branded with the sick, dying mother stamp. Like check that off your bingo cards people, my life is not up for discussion. We talk all period long and she never brought my mom up once. I was so relieved to have someone to talk to. The periods after leading up to lunch flew by and before I knew it I was faced with the lunchroom. I didn't have anyone I could sit with. I scanned the tables looking for an open seat when my eyes landed on Isla. "Audra! Come sit with us." She yelled, waving me across the lunchroom. People stared at me as I took a seat next to her and her friends. She smiles at me and started to introduce everyone. "This is my wonderful boyfriend Ajax. Thats Desmond and his girlfriend Cara, and that is Sam. Everyone, this is Audra." She says enthusiastically. Everyone looks at me in awe. Like I'm some saving grace. It was as if they couldn't believe I existed. I smile nervously. Isla shoots them all a glare and quickly smiles when I go to look at her. They all stopped staring at me and all mumbled hellos. "Oh my gosh Audra, I love your hair. I wish mine would naturally curl." Cara says holding up her thin blonde straight hair looking sad. "Thank you, though, it's a lot to manage." I say in response. She smiles. "So what made your family move here?" She asks unknowingly. Her partner, Desmond I think his name was, nudged her hand. She looked at him for a moment confused, then a short second later she drew her hand up to her lips and gasped. "Oh my gosh, I am so sorry that was so insensitive of me!" She exclaims apologetically. "That's ok, we came here for the advanced Healthcare. It's like no other in the world. It is also a very beautiful country with lush forests and mountains. I personally liked the forest behind our home." I say particularly answering her question. "Yeah, the forests are amazing. Our country prides itself on protecting our nations natural landscape. Not to mention the wildlife that inhabits those areas. The Current King has done a lot to conserve as much land as he could." She says enthusiastically. I smile and we all continued to chat until lunch was over. Soon the end of the day came and I left for my doctors appointment. It started to rain on my walk. Of course, I should have checked the forecast. I huffed, my breath leaving a little white cloud behind. I chuckle to myself and pull the hood of my jacket over my head sheilding my eyes from the rain. I walk and by 2:30 I am at the door to the therapists office. I hesitated slightly at the door, finally pulling it open and walking up to the receptions desk, where a woman peers at me over the thick rim of her glasses. Her brown hair is pulled into a tight bun, and she gives me a polite smile. "Do you have an appointment, dear?" she asks. "Um, yes. Audra Peterson." I respond nervously. "Date of birth?" She says her eyes flickering to her computer. "October 8, 2008," I reply. She types into her computer, her nails clicking against the keyboard "Alright, you're checked in. Dr. Robinson will see you shortly. Please have a seat." She gestures toward the waiting area. I nod and take a seat, pulling out my phone. My fingers scroll mindlessly, but my stomach twists with nerves. I've never done this before. After a few minutes, a voice calls my name. "Audra Peterson?" I look up and see a tall woman with warm, green eyes and a short bob of curly blonde hair. Her bangs brush against her forehead as she smiles at me. "Hi, Audra. I'm Dr. Robinson. Follow me." I stand and follow her down a quiet hallway. Finally reaching a door tnat is decorated with plant and cat decals. She opens it, stepping aside for me to enter first. The room is nothing like I expected. A swing hangs in the corner, draped in blankets and pillows. An oversized beanbag sits next to a couch, and a small shelf holds neatly arranged fidget toys. Dr. Robinson settles into a reclining chair and gestures to the seating options. "Make yourself comfortable," she says. I hesitate before choosing the couch, tucking my hands into my lap. She studies me for a moment, her expression calm but attentive. "So, Audra, before we get into why you're here, I'd like to get to know you a little better. What are some things you enjoy doing in your spare time?" I shift slightly. "I like to paint, read, and go hiking." She jots something down. "That sounds lovely. Where do you like to hike?" She asks, "In the forest behind my house." I answer, quickly. Her eyebrows lift slightly, but she keeps her tone neutral. "I believe that's part of the Royal family's land. I don't think there are many marked trails there, are there?" "Yeah… that's kind of why I'm here." I say trailing off. She nods, leaning forward slightly. "Alright. Tell me more about that." At first, I hesitate. But her steady, non-judgmental gaze encourages me to continue. I start from the beginning, recounting my night in the woods—the fear, the exhaustion, the wolf that saved me. My voice wavers when I admit I can't stop dreaming about it. Dr. Robinson listens intently, nodding occasionally. She doesn't interrupt, doesn't rush me. When I finish, she waits a beat before speaking. "That sounds incredibly overwhelming," she says gently. "It's understandable that you're feeling unsettled after an experience like that." I swallow hard, unsure what to say. She leans back slightly. "What you're describing—fear, recurring dreams, feeling like you have no one to talk to—those are common responses to trauma. What you're going through is real, and it's okay to feel this way." I exhale slowly. Somehow, hearing her say that makes my chest feel lighter. "Would you be open to learning some techniques to help manage those feelings?" she asks. I nod. "Yeah, I think so." For the next few minutes, she walks me through some grounding exercises—simple things, like focusing on my breathing or using my senses to stay present when the memories start to creep in. By the end of the session, I feel more… in control. It's not a solution, not yet, but at least I have a place to start. "Would you like to schedule another appointment?" she asks as we wrap up. "Yes," I say without hesitation. "That's wonderful then, I will see you in a week." She smiles showing back into the waiting area. I set up my next session at the front desk and step outside, breathing in the cool air. Maybe this isn't going to fix everything overnight. But for the first time in a while, I don't feel so alone.I stared at the bracelet she gave me, running my hands across the braided leather and small gold and red beads. "Whenever you're scared or losing yourself in your mind. Just run your fingers across the bracelet. Think of it's color, texture, and the weight on your wrist. It will help bring you back to your surroundings." Her words echoed in my mind as I walked towards the hospital to see my mom. It was a short walk so I'll just have dad pick me up afterwards. Once I'm there I check in and walk down the hall, my shoes clicking against the tiled floor. I pause infront of her door then I knocked gently. "Come in." I hear her say. I open the door slowly, and softly close it behind me. I walk into view and the second she sees me she sets her book down beside her on the table and outstretched her arms to welcome me into a hug. I walk over quickly, and fall into her arms breathing out a sigh. Her hug was so warm and comforting. I breathed in her comforting scent of, water lilies and fresh rain. "How's it going baby? Are you well?" She asks. "I'm ok mama, I just wanted to see you." I say. She smiles warmly, the brightness reflecting in her dimmed eyes. "Well good, You'll see a lot more of me soon. The doctor says I can come home this weekend." She says cheerily. I pull back slightly, looking into her tired blue eyes. The same as mine. "That's wonderful mama. I'm so happy you're doing better." I say excitedly. She nodded, her smile growing. "I can't wait to be home. I miss real food, and I swear, the nurses here have no sense of seasoning." She made a playful face, and I let out a small laugh. "You always say that." I scoffed, playfully. "Because it's true!" she teased, shaking her head laughing. "Kai better not have let your father burn the kitchen down while I've been away." I smiled, relaxing into the moment, letting myself believe—just for a second—that everything was okay. That soon, Mom would be home, and things might finally start feeling normal again. But then, something in her expression changed. The warmth in her eyes dulled slightly. "I need to tell you something Audra." Her voice low as she leans into my ear. "Be careful." She murmured. "There are things here that could seriously hurt you, this country may seem safer than back home, but it's not. Don't wander around any of the forests or streets." She says, warning me. Did she know about the wolf? My nightmares? Did dad tell her? I nod slowly, my thoughts racing, my fingers instinctively brushing againt my bracelet, tracing againt the braids. "I'll be careful mama. I promise." She smiles satisfied, leaning back against the hospital bed. "There's no need to be afraid." She whispers, opening her arms to me, as she softly hums my melody. Like I was rushed to the past, I curl into her arms, resting my head against her chest. I listened to her heartbeat as I felt her voice vibrate in her chest.
"Sleep, my love, the night is deep,
Moonlight dances, stars will keep.
Winds may call, and waves may sigh,
But I will hold you when you cry."
I listened as she sang, her voice being lost to the sterile air of the hospital room. Tears fell down my face, as she tightened her arms around me. She brought her hand up, cupping my cheek, using her thumb to wipe away the tears that fell. "You used to beg me to sing this every night," she said softly. "Even when you were too old for lullabies." I let out a small, breathy laugh, blinking against the sting in my eyes. "Because it made me feel safe." Her hand lingered against my cheek, her thumb mindlessly brushing against my skin. "And it still does, doesn't it?" I nodded. I couldn't speak past the lump in my throat. She continued singing, her voice light but steady.
"Close your eyes, my darling light,
Dream of rivers, blue and bright.
When you wake, you'll know the way,
The dawn will chase the dark away."
Everthing faded as she continued to hum. It was just us. A mother, and her daughter, reliving the past. We talk for another hour before I had to go home. Dad stops in and they talk for a little before he took me home. He had already cooked dinner so I grabbed my plate of leftovers and watched my phone while I ate. I cleaned up my plate and went upstairs to do my homework before retiring to bed. For a somewhat restful sleep.