Chad wasn't sure why she wanted to prove it to him, but he was glad she did and was curious about what it tasted like. He wasn't sure what to say—saying just "nice" might be a bit boring. He could say that he also wasn't wearing knickers or boxers, but then she might ask him to prove it, and she would see his jizz-covered cock... and that might be awkward to explain. He just stood there as she remained holding her skirt up.
He blurted out, "It's prettier than a summer sunset and twice as bold!"
Autumn, still with the skirt of her dress yanked up, squinted at him. "Twice as bald? Ya mean like, no hair at all? Oh, wait, ya mean no hair and none o' them pesky ingrown hairs too. Ya know, them right annoying ones... Nope, no ingrown hairs 'ere, but me cousin does."
… Not exactly what he meant. And Summer—definitely not the best wording... It could be her sister's name, but considering her name was Autumn, it seemed likely her family were all named after seasons. What if she took him saying sunset as a euphemism for beasts?
Maybe he was just overthinking all of this.
Her dog caught a scent—the strong smell coming from somewhere, its nose twitching—and bolted forward, diving right beneath Autumn's skirt. Before she could react, it started licking her pussy—deep, greedy swipes that hit hard. She yanked the leash, but it didn't faze the mutt; it just kept at it, lapping harder with every tug.
"Humpy!" she said. "What did I tell ya about doin' that? Naughty doggo!"
Chad's eyes bugged out, a queasy lurch twisting his gut as a flush of disbelief scorched his face—partly repulsed, partly unable to look away from the bizarre, unhinged spectacle unfolding.
She huffed, voice tight. "I didn't wanna be doin' this, but you've left me no choice." Then, with a quick flex, she ripped a massive queef—a loud, barking blast square in the dog's face. Humpy stumbled back, rattled, shaking its head like it'd been smacked by the rancid wind, clueless about the sour stench that had just blasted its snout.
Chad stood frozen, jaw slack, still processing the chaos. Autumn let her skirt fall and struck a bold pose—proud, like she was showing 'off a grand talent, being 'able to queef like that, grinning like she'd just hit the Golden Buzzer on Britain's Got Talent. She strutted with the swagger of someone about to perform her queef trick for the King at the Royal Variety Performance. Simon Cowell better watch out for warm queefs—don't want to melt what's left of his plastic surgery.
Autumn snickered, Told ya they'd back off," glancing at Humpy, who was now pawing at their nose, whining with their tail tucked low.
Chad had been itching to find out how her pussy tasted, but after that explosive queef and Humpy's slobbering antics, any urge to slide his tongue in there had vanished—replaced by a grimace at the thought of lapping up dog spit.
Humpy whimpered, darted off, then circled back, eyeing Autumn warily. He sneezed twice—hard—then slumped down, tongue hanging limply. Pawing at the dirt, he shuddered. His glare made one thing clear: he wasn't done with her just yet—and maybe, just maybe, he'd even enjoyed the breeze.
Chad wasn't sure what else to say to break the awkwardness with Autumn and her breeze. He stared at the doggo—Humpy, the perverted menace who tried to lick people's genitals and hump their legs—and muttered, "Humpy… yeah, I can see why you named the doggo that."
Autumn waggled her eyebrows. "Very observant, you are."
Did she just turn into Yoda for a second?
She went on talking. "Ahh, so ya've noticed all them cysts on Humpy's back, have ya?"
"Cysts? Huh?" Chad's stomach flipped, a sour taste creeping up his throat. He'd never felt the urge to gag quite like this before.
Autumn casually parted the fur on Humpy's back, revealing the lumps one by one, her fingers gliding over each cyst like she inspected rare treasures.
Humpy sprang to life, tail whipping back and forth like a crazed windscreen wiper, panting with a dopey, lopsided grin—evidently loving it, as if she'd just brushed against some forbidden sweet spot.
The dog started eagerly licking her face and arms, its rough tongue slapping against her skin, before it suddenly darted toward Chad, drool dripping in thick, glistening strands down its chin. He instinctively stepped back, his body tense, making sure it didn't get near his leg again. "Oh no, no, no..." he muttered under his breath, clearly unsettled by the dog's persistence.
Chad stammered, his words stumbling out awkwardly, "No... I mean, Humpy... the name's, uh, quite apropos." (The farm girl definitely ain't gonna know the meaning of that 'A' word.) He paused, clearly uncomfortable explaining this, and continued, "... like, Humpy's a pervert... and Humpy just LOVES to hump..."
"Humpy's a perv, is they?!! What gives ya that idea?" She bent down to pet the dog on the head, completely oblivious to the camera's angle, which captured an unintended glimpse beneath her pinafore dress. Chad glanced down, while the dog, clearly aware, stared at her chest with eager attention, happily pawing and panting as the lens lingered on the moment.
"They are looking at your boobs down your dress. I mean, I am as well. You just bent down in front of me, and I couldn't not look, but look at the doggo; they are trying to get their head right in your dress."
"Nonsense! They're just playin about, bein' lil ol' Humpy as usual."
Lil old humpy? That was a mumble rapper's name he definitely wouldn't want to listen to.
"W-what about... them, y'know... licking your pussy and trying to hump my leg?"
"Lickin' me pussy, oi? Oh, I get it... you're jealous, are ya? You want a go too?" She lifted the skirt of her dress again, revealing her pussy to both the dog and Chad. "If ya really only had to say... just head back to me little cottage, and we can share a soak in the tin bath out back. The water's right lovely 'round this time of year, nice and warm after the sun's been on it for a bit... makes all the work worth it. 'Course, the bath's not fancy, but it's perfect for a quiet dip. No rush, just a proper chill out." She gave Humpy a firm nudge to move him along, then slowly pulled her skirt down, the soft rustle of fabric mixing with the sounds of the nature around them.