After Yoon Taehee left the Chief's office, Jaegyeom was troubled all day.
'As expected, you know a thing or two. What to say and when to break me down. You know too well...'
Yoon Taehee, who had left behind puzzling words and disappeared somewhere, didn't show up until evening, and in the end, he didn't return to the office until Jaegyeom left work. After leaving work alone like that, Jaegyeom sat cross-legged on the bed late at night when everyone was asleep, staring at his phone.
There was no contact from Yoon Taehee.
In the end, Jaegyeom thought that Yoon Taehee must be really angry.
The guy who usually pestered him so much hadn't contacted him all day and didn't even drive him home.
The reason why he was angry was clear. It was
obviously because of what Jaegyeom had said in anger earlier in the Chief's office.
He was teaching him spelling and spacing even using his own time, and in response to that, he heard words like "What's the use of learning?" and that it was
useless. He seemed to be offended.
Should I contact him first and apologize...
Jaegyeom scratched his cheek with an indifferent expression.
Putting himself in Yoon Taehee's shoes, if he had heard such words while sincerely teaching, he would have felt discouraged too. However, apart from that, deep down he also thought, 'But did I really say something that bad?'
When this month passed and the next month came, it would be three months as promised with Yoon Taehee. With everything ending in two months, it was natural to feel that the time spent studying Korean, which wasn't even necessary, was meaningless. Both the learner and the teacher were just wasting energy unnecessarily.
Anyway, it didn't seem like something to get this angry about when it wasn't even technically wrong.
Besides, compared to how he's been running his mouth at me until now…
"..."
As his thoughts reached this point, Jaegyeom's eyebrows twitched.
That's right. Come to think of it, Yoon Taehee in the past was an ill-mannered guy who would torment people by nitpicking at every little thing that displeased him.
As he sat quietly reflecting on his own faults, Jaegyeom, far from being a person of integrity, naturally developed a sense of defiance, thinking 'What the hell, how great are you?' Thus, the feeling of guilt that had been rolling around like a grain of rice in Jaegyeom's heart had now turned into a house-sized resentment.
And so, the mature mindset of 'Is it my fault?' and self-reflection disappeared like melting snow.
Considering what Yoon Taehee had done to him so far, this was nothing. So there was no need to feel sorry. No, in fact, he thought it was a good thing.
Jaegyeom had been worrying a lot about his future relationship with Yoon Taehee anyway. The incident a few days ago when Yoo Namsaeng cried at the dining table was a decisive moment.
That day, Yoo Namsaeng had shed tears saying he was scared because he was happy. At that moment, Jaegyeom remembered a feeling he had forgotten for a while. It was the 'heart of a person saying goodbye'.
If things went well according to plan, he would end this life in two months.
Jaegyeom, who had always been in the position of being left behind, was now in the position of leaving.
He had never specifically thought about how to prepare for a farewell. Also, to be honest, he had somewhat pushed it aside, avoiding it as it wasn't an immediate concern. However, he now felt it was time to prepare.
And from then on, Jaegyeom worried about Yoon Taehee who would be left alone.
At first, he wasn't worried about him. They knew each other's purposes and had joined hands to achieve those purposes. However, from the moment he learned that Yoon Taehee liked him, Jaegyeom started to become increasingly concerned about him.
To make the future separation easier, he should maintain an appropriate distance from now on. For Jeongju and Mesani, who had lived together for so long, it was pointless to try to distance himself now, but it was different for Yoon Taehee, whom he had met not long ago. Moreover, as time passed, he was getting closer and closer to Yoon Taehee, which was definitely a problem.
'I enjoy being with you.'
Wasn't Yoon Taehee afraid of the fact that all of this would end someday?
After pondering deeply, Jaegyeom concluded that it wouldn't be bad to use this incident as an opportunity
to gradually distance himself from Yoon Taehee. It was for Yoon Taehee who would be left behind, and also for Jaegyeom himself. Because parting is equally painful for both the one leaving and the one left behind. It shouldn't deepen any further.
He should continue to get along well as they had been, but now he should avoid situations where they were alone together for long periods. It seemed okay to commute together or eat meals, but things like studying together side by side as they had been doing... this didn't seem good.
Jaegyeom neatly folded away the thought of contacting Yoon Taehee first. Finally, after turning off the lights and lying down, Jaegyeom closed his eyes and quietly tried to sleep.
It was when he had fallen into a light sleep.
Ring, ring...
At some point, the phone rang on the bedside table.
Jaegyeom, buried in his blanket, opened his eyes. He reached out, fumbling outside the blanket to grasp his phone.
[Yoon Taehee]
The moment he saw the name on the screen, his heart skipped a beat. Jaegyeom's eyes, which had been slightly drowsy, flew wide open. He raised his upper body and stared blankly at the screen. He wondered what could be happening at this time past midnight after no contact all day.
Debating whether to answer or not, Jaegyeom hesitantly put the phone to his ear.
"..."
Although he answered the phone, Jaegyeom maintained silence at first.
-...
The other side was equally silent.
But even after waiting for a while, nothing was heard.
Jaegyeom, holding the phone to his ear, slightly furrowed his brow. What's this, did he dial wrong? Or did the call disconnect...
He was checking the screen briefly when he brought it back to his ear.
- It's me.
Just then, a low voice flowed from the phone.
Jaegyeom, who had flinched, silently cleared his throat once. Then he responded casually as if nothing had happened.
"Oh... what is it?"
- Come out.
With those words, the call abruptly ended. It was an extremely unfriendly and ill-mannered conversation.
Jaegyeom frowned as he looked down at the bright screen in the darkness.
Where did he want him to come out to at this time of the night?
He thought about calling back to ask properly, but out of concern, he got up. He decided to go out to the front gate for now. Just as he quietly opened the gate and peeked out his head, that's when he saw it.
A familiar figure was visible under the streetlight in front of the house. It was Yoon Taehee, leaning against the wall, bathed in the orange streetlight. His black sedan was nowhere to be seen, unlike usual.
He was crouched down with his face buried in his knees. Several crushed cigarette butts were scattered near his feet, indicating he had been there for some time.
Jaegyeom gently closed the gate to avoid making noise and spoke.
"Hey."
But Yoon Taehee showed no reaction, as if he was asleep.
"Hey."
When he called out once more, Yoon Taehee slowly raised his head.
"What are you doing here? Why did you come?"
Jaegyeom asked gruffly from a distance. He wondered if Yoon Taehee had come to receive an apology. Then Yoon Taehee tilted his head slightly and looked in Jaegyeom's direction. With his cheek resting on his arm, he stared intently at Jaegyeom with half-closed eyes for a long time before finally moving his lips.
"I came because I missed you."
Caught off guard by the unexpected answer, Jaegyeom was momentarily speechless.
"..."
Fidgeting with his fingers, he finally opened his mouth.
"W-we're going to see each other at headquarters tomorrow anyway, so why..."
"I wanted to see you before tomorrow came."
It was an honest answer, neither hidden nor embellished.
Yoon Taehee, who had been crouching with his back against the wall, slowly stood up. He stood facing Jaegyeom, who was standing a few steps away. But upon closer inspection, his gait was very unsteady compared to usual. Jaegyeom, who had been observing Yoon Taehee closely, asked.
"Have you... been drinking?"
Yoon Taehee bowed his head deeply and shoved both hands into his pants pockets.
"Yeah."
It had been uncertain when he was crouching, but now face to face, it was clear. Yoon Taehee was extremely drunk right now. This wasn't the first time Jaegyeom had seen him drunk. However, compared to then, Yoon Taehee was now in a state of complete intoxication. He seemed to have difficulty even maintaining his balance. The smell of alcohol was so strong that it was noticeable even from a few steps away.
At that moment, Yoon Taehee suddenly brought his right hand near his face and bit his finger hard enough to draw blood. A red bead of blood quickly formed on his fingertip, then dripped onto the ground.
"W-what are you doing?"
Jaegyeom raised his voice in alarm, wondering if this was some kind of drunken behavior. That's when Yoon
Taehee staggered closer to Jaegyeom, suddenly grabbed him by the collar, and slammed him against the wall. Jaegyeom, pulled by the unexpected force and hitting his back against the wall, winced and furrowed his brow.
"What are you doing?"
He asked, grabbing Yoon Taehee's wrist that was gripping his collar. Then Yoon Taehee slowly extended his hand that was dripping with blood. With his bloodied fingertip, he traced along Jaegyeom's messy bangs, drawing a straight line across his round forehead. Surprised by this incomprehensible action,
Jaegyeom jerked his head to the side.
Yoon Taehee muttered to himself with an expressionless face.
Kim Jaegyeom.
Kim Jaegyeom...
Kim Jaegyeom...
"Hey, what are you doing right now?!"
Just as Jaegyeom was furrowing his brow and trying to shake off Yoon Taehee's wrist, it happened.
"Kiss me."
"...What?"
"Kiss me."
At this sudden request, Jaegyeom's eyes slowly widened.
"..."
"..."
The two stared into each other's eyes without saying anything for a while. A heavy silence fell as if time had stopped. At some point, Yoon Taehee slowly released his grip on Jaegyeom's collar and murmured hazily.
"It's not working..."