Our footsteps echoed like a loud clash in the tense silence. The floor creaked beneath us, as if sending each of our movements back to the walls as a warning. I didn't want to look down at Elise and the others. I could feel their nervous gazes on us even without seeing them as we ascended the steps.
The ruler… or the general? I no longer knew what to call him. He walked ahead of me, then stopped at a heavy door. With a single movement, he pushed it open and gestured for me to step inside.
I didn't want to look at him. The restless pounding in my chest spread through me in waves, my thoughts entangling, messy and incoherent. But before I could speak—before I could hurl my questions at him—he beat me to it.
— Don't overthink things. It's pointless.
My jaw tightened.
Doubts, uncertainties, questions. They all swirled inside me, every nerve clinging to answers I didn't even have yet. Who am I? What am I? What will happen to me? And this is what he says…
An immeasurable fury surged through me, my emotions refusing to settle for even a second. I wouldn't address him formally. He had just lost my respect.
It didn't even matter what happened to me anymore. Not that it ever truly did, but now, it definitely didn't.
— Are you joking right now? — I looked straight into his eyes, not bothering to hide my irritation. — I mean… what exactly am I not supposed to overthink?! Do you even realize what just happened?!
My words cracked through the silence like a whip.
— I literally saved all of you! With my own power! A power I didn't even know existed!
Gabriel stared at me for a long moment, his gaze dark and unreadable. Then, he simply nodded.
— Yes. You saved us. You did something noble. From now on, you don't have to fear being sent away—I won't allow it. And most of all, I won't let them send you beyond the Mist.
His words were a reassurance, but they did nothing to ease the storm raging inside me. I stepped closer to him, just enough that only a few centimeters separated us.
— But if you knew… if you truly knew how overwhelming my desire was to kill Clarissa… — my voice was quiet, yet it trembled with tension. — You'd probably throw me straight into the hands of the demons, not just beyond the Mist.
A brief, heavy silence fell between us.
— Who knows, maybe this… — I lifted my hand, watching as my fingers trembled slightly — …is capable of much more. Capable of releasing something far worse.
My gaze searched his, but he remained impassive, looking back at me with unwavering calm.
— Lock it away, then — I whispered, almost to myself.
Gabriel shook his head.
— Why would I? I have other plans.
He parted his lips to continue, but I cut him off.
— Is your plan to make me listen to this for the rest of my life? — My words dripped with sarcasm. — That I'm a Nephilim? That they hate me?
The man let out a quiet chuckle. It wasn't mocking, nor was it cruel, yet something about its lightness stung.
— Nephilim… — he repeated, as if tasting the word, as if finding it some strange joke.
I narrowed my eyes at him.
— What's so funny? — I asked, my tone sharp.
His smile disappeared. His gaze turned cold, his voice commanding.
— Watch your temper.
I felt the air between us grow cold.
— This may be new to you, but right now, you're speaking to the ruler.
Almost imperceptibly, I pulled my shoulders back.
— Even if my position is temporary, it's still valid. So watch your tone.
I pressed my lips together.
— You're not a Nephilim. Who told you that nonsense? You're not evil either. Get these foolish ideas out of your head. This is what I meant when I said you're overthinking things.
For a long moment, I didn't move. Then, slowly, I sat down in the chair he motioned for me to take.
— Do you know who I am? — I finally asked, my voice almost a whisper.
Gabriel nodded.
— Yes. An angel. A soul that has long been ready to become one.
His words cut straight to the bone.
— The rest doesn't matter — he added. — Ignorance is sometimes a blessing. Your memories will return, but not all of them. Some things are better left unknown.
My hands clenched into fists in my lap.
— They won't look at you kindly — he continued in a low voice. — That's true. Do they resent you in the palace? Yes. Do they see you as a full-fledged angel? No.
I furrowed my brows at him.
— But they will. I promise.
— And… what do you mean by that? — I asked cautiously.
— You may continue addressing me informally — he said lightly. — I know you want to know about your past. I know you're curious. I know you haven't quite pieced the puzzle together yet.
For a long moment, I simply watched him in silence.
— But for your own protection — he went on — don't dig any further into your past. We must focus on the present.
I pressed my lips together.
— Right now, the city is under my command. Which means, with your help, we can build a city that's more livable. A system that will help souls trapped at the borders finally be reborn. We can change everything the previous ruler failed to.
Something inside my chest stirred at his words.
— And… how could I possibly help with that?
Gabriel observed me quietly, then let out a soft sigh.
— You are holy. That much is clear. You bear Samuel's mark as well. But we don't know if it has fallen.
The world seemed to halt for a single moment.
And then he spoke the words that turned everything upside down.
— That's why I want you to marry me.
My eyes widened, and for a moment, it felt as if the blood in my veins had frozen. As if I had ceased to exist, as if time itself had come to a halt around me. He must have seen my shock—my face had gone so pale that even milk would have been ashamed beside me.
"I know," he spoke again, measured and calm. His voice was steady, but each word cut into me like a blade. "I know this is difficult for you to grasp, but you must understand—if we don't act now, you could be exiled Beyond the Mist. And from there, there is no escape. No more life, no more love, no more chances, no more possibilities."
There was an old memory vibrating behind his words, a feeling I did not want to understand.
"Your past self wanted this desperately," he continued softly. "Wanted to become a full-fledged angel."
"And to be with you?" I asked nervously. I didn't even give him the chance to answer.
My heart shrank in my chest. I didn't know what to say, what to think. There was only one way out—anger.
"If you think you can kill two birds with one stone—that you won't just become a ruler, but that you'll also get me—you're mistaken," I snapped. "This is not a game. The one you loved is not me anymore. Maybe my body is the same, maybe even my soul, but my life is different. My fate is different."
And yet, his words burned into me. If this power was within me now, it had been there before, too. Maybe it had simply gone unnoticed.
"If I didn't become a full-fledged angel back then, just to be with you, then maybe… I wasn't supposed to be with you," I whispered.
For the briefest moment, his face seemed to waver. But when he spoke again, his voice was cold and resolute.
"You misunderstand," he said. "I do not expect you to love me. I do not expect you to be attached to me. I am not marrying you as my lover, but as a partner with whom I can build a better future for Rindanof. And whom it is my duty to save."
My heart pounded in my chest.
"A word of advice," he went on. "If you reject your past selves this much, if you want to distance yourself so desperately from what you once were, then don't seek them out. Don't look for your past if you're not ready to face it."
His voice became quieter, but there was a warning in it.
"You can perish if you want. Completely. But even that is not so simple. Beyond the Mist, there is no redemption. It is not oblivion. It is suffering that stretches across eons, across billions of years—until, at last, you are utterly erased."
I trembled. I couldn't force a single word out of myself.
"Think before you speak," he said finally. "And be grateful that you still have a choice."
His words echoed inside me. He was right. I had been too caught up in my own emotions, too convinced that everyone acted solely out of self-interest. But he was not forcing me. He was not trying to impose anything on me. He was simply offering a possibility.
And maybe, if we stood together… maybe we really could change something.
"And what about the leadership?" I asked hoarsely. "The Council? Dahlia? They won't look kindly upon this."
"That's irrelevant," he replied. "You will have your own duties. Being part of the ruling family is very different from being part of the defense forces. You will have to live a different life. The life of a ruler's wife. You will have to act under different rules, with different responsibilities."
My heart pounded in my throat.
"You could become a full-fledged angel," he said, as if it were the most natural thing in the world. "You only have to do one thing. Stand by me."
I lowered my head.
"So… a marriage of convenience," I whispered. "At least the concept is appealing."
He did not answer right away. For a moment, he just looked at me, then stepped closer. With a single motion, he tucked a loose strand of my hair behind my ear. His touch felt far too natural. For a fleeting second, my eyes gleamed.
"My ideas have always appealed to you," he said quietly. "And no matter how much you deny it to yourself… your eyes do not lie."
My heart skipped a beat.
"But I will not force anything upon you," he continued. "Let us be each other's refuge. But forever."
His words fell around me like softly drifting snow.
"You must engrave this into your mind," he said. "From now on, we will be twin souls. If you agree."
The world suddenly grew quieter around me. I could hear only my own breathing and see only his gaze. And I knew—I was making a choice. A choice for life.
I looked into his eyes. I saw the measured determination, the piercing force that radiated from his every movement. But there was something else, too. A tiny, barely perceptible sorrow. Not the sorrow of doubt, not of weakness—but the sorrow of someone who knows that for the sake of a better world, there is no room for personal wishes. I saw that this was not easy for him either, that he, too, felt the weight of how narrow this path had become, how only two choices remained: accept his offer, or disappear into nothingness.
Perhaps that, in the end, was what convinced me. Not his words. Not his reasoning. But the fact that I saw that this pained him, too.
"Alright. I accept." I met his gaze and swallowed hard. "As for my past lives… I do not deny them. But I do not truly know them either. I do not know what they meant—what they mean now. I try not to reject them, but…"
I hesitated for a moment. It was not easy to say this.
"But above all else, the goal is what matters most."
I raised my hand, as if this were the rebirth of some ancient, forgotten oath or alliance. A pure pact, devoid of emotion.
"The goal above all else."
He shook my hand. I felt his determination in my very bones, his resolve flowing into me. Something had changed irreversibly in that moment.
But he did not let go just yet.
"One last thing, before I become ruler and you become queen." His voice was deep and steady, but there was a playful edge to it. "Soldier. The fight you gave yesterday—it was an honorable battle."
I smiled. Even in such a grave, ice-cold situation, he managed to keep that peculiar, strangely boyish sense of humor. He was resolute and commanding, yet there was an ease about him.
But deep down, I knew—this was more than just a decision. I hadn't even fully grasped the consequences yet. This was not about love. Not about feelings. It was about a goal, about a chance to change things. A chance to save myself.
And yet… somewhere inside, I felt a faint, hidden tightening. An emotion I couldn't quite place.
There was someone else. Someone I had never fully seen, never touched, and yet… had always been there. A presence lingering behind every decision, flickering at the edges of every choice. A shadow from the past, from the future—or perhaps both.
I did not yet realize its significance.
Because the soul may be pulled in many directions, may find many shelters, may wander many roads…
But in the end, it always returns home.
My heart was pounding in my throat when the moment came to go down and share the news with Clara and the others. I took a deep breath, knowing they would understand; I didn't have much choice. At least this way, we can create a better system.
When we opened the door and stepped out, all eyes were on us. Desperate eyes, searching glances greeted us. Even Elis was scrutinizing me anxiously, as if looking for signs of harm, though we knew that neither Gabriel nor the angelic guard would do such a thing. It seemed they only believed their own eyes now.
We descended, and I froze like a soldier. We stood among them, but I didn't know what to say. I just looked at them, pale as a sheet, and they waited for us to speak.
"Well," Gabriel spoke beside me, "the decision is simple and unchangeable. I want you to be the first to know: Avarka and I are getting married."
I didn't speak, just looked at them. Everyone turned even paler. I couldn't read anything on Clara's face. They hadn't expected this either. They knew that angels only marry their twin flames, and this is an inseparable bond. It also became clear that I couldn't be a Nephilim, because then this marriage couldn't take place; only two pure-blooded angels can legally marry.
Elis hurried to me, searching for words. John's face was a mix of anger and surprise. Clara spoke softly:
"I need to sit down; I'm dizzy."
With John's help, she sat back in the leather armchair. Gabriel looked at me and said:
"Please, go get some fresh air. The soldiers will escort you."
"I'll go too," Michael spoke up.
I hadn't even noticed him until now. His face was surprised but calmer than the others. I stepped out silently, still unable to process what had happened, so I just let things unfold.
Michael walked beside me and broke the silence:
"Should I congratulate you now?" he tried to look at me amusedly. "Sorry, I don't have a wedding gift with me, and I look rather unkempt, but…"
He started adjusting himself, as if trying to improve his disheveled appearance.
"I hope you understand, I wasn't prepared for a wedding."
I laughed as he tried to play along, smoothing his hair and dusting himself off with his hands. It was amusing, and I knew that was his intention.
"I don't even know what to prepare for anymore," I looked at him. I didn't feel like explaining myself to anyone, so I avoided his gaze. He seemed to understand my thoughts.
"You don't need to explain yourself to me. I know well why you're doing this. It's an elegant move from Gabriel to offer this to you. Because it's quite obvious that even if you are a full angel, they won't accept you as a full-fledged angel. Not even because of the color of your eyes. We've seen that it's not like ours when you transform. And, of course, we haven't seen any wings yet. But I also know that if you don't do this, they'll send you beyond the fog for complete annihilation. And I know it's not the best time, but have you really thought this through?"
"Would it be better to be annihilated?" I retorted immediately.
"Ah, no, of course not, I didn't mean that, just… You two aren't twin flames."
Somehow I had felt this before, but no one had said it out loud. I was more interested in what made him so certain.
"How are you so sure?" I looked at him.
"Because I know."
There's a moment when you feel someone knows more than they're letting on. I don't know where it came from, but the question burst out of me:
"Michael?"
I stopped walking for a moment and looked deeply into the man's eyes.
"Did you know me in my previous lives?"
I thought he would be shocked or frightened by the question, but he wasn't. He stood firm.
"Do you mean to ask if you kicked me off the roof in your previous lives as well? No, no, actually, you always… committed different… different things against me."
He tried to make a joke of it.
"You know that's not what I asked," I looked at him with a half-smile.
"Yes, you could say I did know you," he replied more seriously.
The naive question would have been to ask what he knew about me, but I noticed something. Here, no one will talk about me or my past lives. Either I figure it out myself, or no one says anything. I didn't understand this then, but they have their reasons. So I didn't even ask the question; I wasn't in the mood for unnecessary drama or evasive answers.
However, there was one more question that interested me.
"And did you know Elise?"
Now he was a bit taken aback. He stopped walking, looked at me, swallowed, and then answered, not at all humorously:
"Yes, you could say I knew her."
"Do I want to know this?" I asked, seeing both pain and longing in his eyes.
"I think it's not for me to tell, but for that aggressive cotton ball," I know he meant Elis.
I smiled, and then suddenly we heard a voice:
"Miss Avarka, come," one of the soldiers called.
"Miss?" Michael looked at me playfully. "Tomorrow I'll have to bow to you?!"
"Go on!" I touched his shoulder playfully, as if pushing him slightly.
We walked back, but I felt the nervousness taking over me again.
When we stepped through the door, they were all seated. Clara was staring into the void, holding her head, John sat firmly in his leather armchair, and Alice was playing with her fingers as if their touch could soothe her. But the moment we crossed the threshold, they all turned their gazes toward us.
Gabriel stopped as well, measuring us for a moment before speaking in a measured tone:
— The official proposal has taken place. You have ten minutes to discuss things, then we must leave. The convoy is already waiting for us.
His words were objective, yet there was an unyielding firmness in them. After a brief pause, he turned toward Clara and the others.
— Naturally, you may join us.
He did not wait for a response. He turned decisively and walked out the door, followed by the soldiers. I knew that although they had disappeared from sight, the guards were still standing outside on either side of the door. From now on, I was no longer the one watching others' steps—others were watching mine.
As the door closed behind them, the only thing stirring the silence of the living room was the tension in the air. Finally, Clara broke the quiet.
— All my life… — she began softly, her voice carrying a deep sorrow. She cleared her throat as if the words she was about to speak were heavier than she had anticipated. — I feared that Elise would ever have to live within the palace walls. But I was at peace—she looked at me—that you would never be in danger of it. And now I am at peace that Elise is safe from this fate. But I am anxious that from now on, it will be your home.
I was about to open my mouth when John spoke up as well:
— Don't get us wrong, dear. We are not angry with you. We know you had no other choice. But we feel guilty… for not realizing sooner what you truly are.
His voice was measured, but I could hear the guilt in it.
— They concealed your identity so precisely that we had no chance of finding out. We don't know who did it, but it was a meticulous job.
Their words reassured me somewhat, but the tension still lingered. Elise suddenly jumped up and blurted out indignantly:
— I'm just glad they didn't destroy you immediately!
Her voice trembled, and in the blink of an eye, she threw her arms around me, tears streaming down her face.
— Come, sit down! — she pulled me into the leather armchair and looked at her parents. — Don't be so tense! We have to see the positive side of this whole situation.
John snorted, but Elise didn't let him interrupt.
— You hated this system, didn't you? — she turned to her father. — Well, here you go! Now, the daughter you raised can change it.
I lifted my chin and said firmly:
— And I will change it.
John nodded approvingly, but worry still lurked in his eyes.
— I am proud of you, — he said slowly. — But who knows how long this will last? The ruler will not hand over his position to Gabriel for long. If he intended to, he would have done it already. He knows exactly what Gabriel is planning. That's why he makes him do the work. He is using him… using you… to change the system, and once everything falls into place, he will return. This is not the first time he has done this.
There was resentment, bitterness in his voice.
I understood John, though I had never liked politics—not among humans, nor here. But I could feel that the same divisions existed here. Some people admired the ruler, while others despised him.
— Don't say such things! — Clara scolded her husband. — The last time Gabriel ruled, it lasted ten thousand years. If the ruler retreats again, it will be for a long time. And he does it for a good cause; he surely has plenty of duties.
John scoffed mockingly.
— You mean his idling at the gates of hell?
— I'm serious! — Clara snapped. — Don't talk about him like that!
— I'm just telling the truth, — John muttered.
Clara's eyes flashed with anger.
— He is not idling! He protects that gate! He helps the souls! He filters out those who do not belong there and brings them back. He is the only one who can do this!
Silence fell. I watched Clara's face; there was fire burning in her eyes.
— He does countless good things there, things you can't even comprehend. And you can't even begin to understand how much work it takes. He has been the ruler of that city since the beginning for a reason. He does not follow human laws; he follows the angelic order. Maintaining balance is his duty, and he fulfills it even if we do not see it.
John didn't respond. Elise shrugged.
— Alright, Mom. But that still doesn't change the fact that he is there when he should be here.
Clara let out a quiet sigh.
— Speak if there is someone to listen, — she muttered under her breath.
But then, I spoke softly:
— I only want to know… what is his name? The ruler?
The room fell silent. Clara and Alice exchanged glances.
They sighed in unison.
— I'm serious, as soon as we get back to the palace, your first task will be to check that damn flash drive. — Elis looked at me, her gaze commanding.
Clara smiled almost triumphantly.
— Uriel — she said in a proud, ringing voice. — The ruler's name is Uriel.
It was as if that single name had simultaneously ripped out every weed within me and, with a single motion, planted flowers in the empty field. The shock I felt mixed with some deep-seated recognition. As if I had heard that name before. It was familiar. Hellishly familiar. It enchanted me.
But before I could sink into my thoughts, Clara's silky voice filled the space again.
— He's not the one you should fear within the palace walls — she said quietly — but rather the council and those who live there. They are the ones obsessed with control. But we will be by your side and teach you everything. This isn't a simple transition.
— Alright! — Elis suddenly snapped, then jumped from her seat. — But you don't have to look so miserable! Hello! Am I the only one who realized that there's going to be a wedding here?
She looked at me, amused.
— And probably sooner rather than later because otherwise, they'll kill you — she shrugged easily. — So, in a few days, you'll probably be a bride.
Then she turned to her mother, then to her father.
— Could you look a little more like a joyful mother? — she pointed at her mother, then at her father. — And you're the father of the bride! Why are you sitting so stiffly? Smile a little!
She waved her hands in front of them as if she could force a smile out of them.
— I swear, if I weren't here, you all would have lost your minds long ago! — she pointed at me. — And look at yourself! Is this how you want to get married? We're leaving right now; I have so much work to do with you!
Then she turned back to her parents.
— And you two… — she sighed. — Just try to smile. It's not that hard! Like this!
She started smiling, and eventually, it spread to all of us. Elis was always like this. One moment, she sat in silence; the next, she had everyone moving.
— Alright, let's go! We'll deal with the serious matters later. Right now, we have a wedding to plan! — she shouted so loudly I was sure people outside could hear.
But Clara saw the confusion on my face. As if she could see into my feelings, she stepped closer and hugged me tightly.
We left the house and headed toward the cars. Elis was buzzing with excitement, happily choosing which car we should get into.
— I'm sitting in the front! — she declared like a child eager to take the first turn on the swings.
But Michael stood next to the car. Her eyes darkened, and with a half-hearted shrug, she simply said:
— You go in the back. The rear cars are much more spacious.
Michael looked at her calmly but with irritation. It always seemed like they were bickering, but in reality, they fit together almost too well.
Gabriel insisted on driving. John sat in the passenger seat, while Clara, Elis, and I sat in the back.
The first car ahead of us scouted the terrain, while an escort followed behind. I knew this formation; I had studied it myself. We were protected from all directions.
The journey was silent. My stomach twisted. What would they say when I returned?
Finally, a question burst from my thoughts, directed at Gabriel:
— The others… how are they?
I didn't mention names. I didn't have to. Gabriel knew exactly who I meant.
— If you mean your little friends — he began quietly — they're fine. Except for Chloe.
I clenched my fists.
— She was deeply affected by her friend's death — he continued.
Zach.
His name haunted me like the shadow of a nightmare.
— His soul ended up Beyond the Mist, and by the time the special forces went after him, there was nothing left to find.
I knew who they were. The special forces were trained to step beyond the Mist.
But Gabriel continued.
— He's probably in the city on the other side. A place with no return. His body was given a proper burial.
A weight settled on me so heavy I could barely breathe. What would they think of me when I returned? What would Chloe think? Or anyone else in the palace?
Gabriel spoke again.
— As for the others… they're already waiting for us.
I looked up at him.
— What do you mean, waiting?
Clara answered softly:
— My dear, it means that your news arrived before you did.
I froze.
They already knew. Everyone there already knew who I would return as.
A part of me felt relieved. But a much bigger part of me was terrified.
The wheels devoured the road, pebbles clattering against the undercarriage. I could feel us getting closer.
Then I saw the massive gate.
We passed through.
The city was deserted. Too quiet.
There was no movement at the academy either—where people usually trained, drenched in sweat, not a single soul remained.
But as we neared the palace, I understood why.
A crowd swelled before us. Humans, angels, dark-cloaked figures alike.
On the high platform stood two women.
The arrogant one and the kind one.
Their imposing, ceremonial attire signified that my fate had already been decided.
Everyone was waiting for us.
Waiting for me.