Nan Zhubin hadn't slept for two days and a night.
[I've traveled through time!]
A seemingly real environment and a seemingly real body brought this thought to Nan Zhubin.
But this thought terrified him, a psychological consultant extremely sensitive to his profession:
[——Am I crazy? How can I really believe I've traveled through time?]
[But if that's not the case, then what's with the memories in my head?]
[Moreover, why have I been haunted by the same dream since I woke up in this body?]
[Have I really traveled through time, or... have I gone mad? Is my memory jumbled?]
These thoughts kept colliding, rubbing, and clashing in Nan Zhubin's mind.
Nan Zhubin, a professional psychological consultant, faced with these abnormalities he was experiencing, went to the neurology and physical examination departments at the hospital for a thorough check-up first thing.
After ruling out organic diseases of the body, Nan Zhubin decisively pulled out the most widely used outpatient check-up scales for mental disorders and psychological diseases in the country today—the "SCL-90 Symptom Checklist." Without any hesitation, he began to answer the questionnaire.
He needed a quantified score to assess his current state.
But after spending a focused 40 minutes completing the SCL-90 scale, Nan Zhubin discovered a serious issue:
——He was too familiar with this scale, so he subconsciously started to manipulate the scores.
SCL-90 has a total of 9 items. When Nan Zhubin first suspected he was ill, his scores in the areas of [Depression], [Anxiety], [Paranoid], [Psychotic] were outrageously high.
But when Nan Zhubin felt something wrong and calmed down to take it again, the scores for [Depression] and [Anxiety] decreased, while scores for [Interpersonal Sensitivity] and [Hostility] increased.
He had taken the questionnaire many times, each time yielding different results.
Subsequently, Nan Zhubin tested himself using the "Self-Health Assessment Scale (SRHMS)", "Neuropsychiatric Clinical Assessment Table (SCAN)", "Brief Psychiatric Rating Scale (BPRS)", and "Positive and Negative Symptoms Scale (PANSS)" among others.
Unsurprisingly, they revealed the same problem as the SCL-90.
Nan Zhubin thus realized that self-testing with scales was not feasible; he needed to check his condition from a different perspective.
"I need to put myself in an extreme situation where I cannot use my psychological expertise, where I cannot think rationally."
Nan Zhubin murmured softly, looking at the bathroom mirror in front of him: "Then, conduct a more efficient self-test in another way."
The reflection in the mirror had heavy dark circles.
Outside the mirror, he exuded a strong coffee aroma.
He had stayed up all night, for two full days and a night.
Thirty-six hours.
By now, it might even be thirty-seven hours.
At this moment, Nan Zhubin's mind was a muddled mess, unable to formulate coherent sentences, with his thoughts leaping unpredictably to unknown places. In this situation, he could not apply his psychological knowledge to handle problems, ensuring his professional integrity wouldn't interfere with accurate assessment.
But obviously, he couldn't do scales in this state either.
Nan Zhubin decided to test his condition using another method—sandbox therapy.
...
Nan Zhubin gazed at the building in front of him, the words "Jiangdu Law Building" embedded before his eyes.
This building was located in the city center of Jiangdu, surrounded by convenient transportation, gleaming lights and lively noise, clearly indicating steep rental costs just by its appearance.
But such bustling wasn't Nan Zhubin's goal. He took the elevator up slowly, turned left out the door for less than ten steps, and a transparent automatic door slowly opened before him.
The logo "Yan Nuo·Psychological Consultation Center" formed by eight large characters stood there, easy to spot at a glance.
This was a psychological consultation center, offering psychological consultation services. But Nan Zhubin wasn't here for consultation; the secrets in his heart also prevented him from allowing anyone to pry into them.
He adjusted his attire, stepping forward briskly to greet: "Hello?"
A girl in her twenties sat at the center's front desk. She seemed to have been organizing files and didn't notice Nan Zhubin's approach. Startled by the sudden greeting, she reflexively looked up, showing a standard professional smile.
"Hello!"
"Welcome to Yan Nuo Consultation! Is there anything I can help you with? Do you have an appointment with a consultant?"
A string of welcoming words flowed out in a sweet voice.
"I'm not a client; I'm a colleague starting my job today." Nan Zhubin tugged at the corners of his mouth to reveal a gentle smile, "My name is Nan Zhubin."
Realizing her lapse did not cause her to neglect the reception of visitors, the young receptionist sighed with relief. Her initially respectful attitude immediately relaxed, revealing the typical fatigue of a working person.
Even her address changed, moving away from the formal "you": "Are you the one reporting in today? I think there should be only one consultation assistant starting in the past few days, that must be you, you..."
The young receptionist's words suddenly stopped as her gaze fixated on Nan Zhubin's face.
"Yes, it's me. My name is Nan Zhubin." Nan Zhubin repeated his introduction.
The young receptionist's tone abruptly softened, and her gaze still did not shift: "Uh... why are you here so early?"
"Today is my first day at work, so I thought of arriving a bit earlier to familiarize myself with the work environment."
Nan Zhubin replied modestly.
After "suspecting" he had traveled through time, Nan Zhubin, besides going to the hospital for check-ups and self-assessing his psychological condition, quickly organized the online information about his original self and learned that today was indeed the starting day of the new job for the original self.
After cautious consideration, Nan Zhubin decided to come to work: Firstly, if he had indeed traveled through time, he would undoubtedly need to live, and he couldn't do that without a job.
Secondly, scale testing is the most cost-effective psychological test, but if he wanted to use other more advanced psychological techniques for self-testing, then venue and equipment would become an issue. Luckily, this consultation center had a sandbox room, which allowed Nan Zhubin to use sandbox therapy to self-test his psychological condition.
The young receptionist stared fixedly at Nan Zhubin's face, her gaze a bit blank: "But you really are here too early, there's at least another hour until the consultants and assistants start work..."
"Though I'm joining as an assistant, I still want to review my consultation techniques, just in case I might need them," Nan Zhubin asked with a smile, "Is the sandbox room accessible now?"
The young receptionist came to work so early just to memorize the arrangements for the day's activities at the consultation center. She instantly shook her head in response: "There are no clients using the sandbox this morning, so you can go straight in if you want to use it, just remember to tidy up afterward..."
"Or, I could help you tidy up as well..."
"No need, I'm very familiar with it." Nan Zhubin replied politely. Then he scanned the area quickly and suddenly pointed to a stack of pamphlets behind the front desk, "Those—can I have one?"
Nan Zhubin's eyes lit up because it was a stack of "DSM-V" manuals.
"DSM" stands for "Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders." The DSM-V is the fifth edition of the DSM, a version used to classify, diagnose, and assist in treating mental disorders according to a spectrum of diseases.
The scales Nan Zhubin previously used for self-testing had been taken from the original self's former school. However, due to copyright restrictions, professional manuals like these were usually held by specialized institutions, hospitals, and laboratories.
For cautious reasons, Nan Zhubin wanted to self-test again using this version of the tool.
The most important thing is that the previous scales used were ones Nan Zhubin was familiar with, but this manual was somewhat unfamiliar to him. "Familiarity" is a major interfering factor in the reliability of scale scores, so re-testing with the DSM would be more credible than those scales.
"Here you go."
"Thank you—" Nan Zhubin glanced at the young receptionist's name tag with the name [Lu Jia] and politely addressed her: "—Miss Lu."
In the field of psychological consultation, it's proper etiquette to address colleagues as "teacher" when not too familiar, regardless of their specific position; if a young female colleague might prefer not to be referred to as so, adding "Miss" beforehand is more cautious and seems friendly.
Nan Zhubin turned and left, while Lu Jia stayed in place, dazed for a moment.
Her impeccable makeup concealed any change in her complexion, but it was clear her ears slowly turned red with a rosy flush, like tender pink peach blossoms.
"He's really handsome..."
After a while, Lu Jia slowly raised her hand to support her chin.
"He's young too; I may be working with him from now on?"
Lu Jia's face showed satisfaction, like a bear hibernating through winter finally tasting its beloved honey, her entire being exuding a joyfully coy charm.
"But he's got heavy dark circles. Does he like to stay up late reading novels? Guys who love reading novels tend to be rather handsome. Otherwise, could it be..."
Lu Jia's expression suddenly turned serious, revealing a predator's ferocity: "Is his girlfriend too demanding?"
...
The inner drama of the young receptionist was unknown to others.
Nan Zhubin headed for the sandbox room without looking back.
He closed the door, shutting out all the noise.
Before him were two sandboxes, one big and one small, the smaller being about 50cm*70cm*7cm in size, and the larger about twice the length of the small one.
Nan Zhubin walked to the smaller sandbox, immersing his hands into the sand.
He felt the fine sand rubbing and sliding in his palms, as if being soothed; his long-tense and fatigued heart unwittingly began to relax.
Sandbox therapy (self-test), commence.