Daily Meme Here
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I walked off from the chaos, leaving the scene behind.
The sirens got louder. More heroes started showing up. Some of them finally moved, stepping toward us cautiously.
Stain did not resist. Did not try to move.
The camera followed me. The heroes watched me leave.
They had no idea who the fuck I was. If they knew I was just an intern, they would beat the shit out of me, lol.
Mirko appeared out of nowhere, grabbed my ear. "You talk big, brat."
"Ow, Mirko, let me go, I am giving a cool pose!"
She yanked harder. "What, you want a spotlight too? You ain't even licensed."
I pried at her grip. "I was helping!"
She finally let go, shaking her head. "Yeah, yeah, you and every other dumbass in this city. What the hell were you thinking?"
"I was thinking, 'Hey, look, some ugly bastards are causing problems. Might as well beat their heads in.'"
"You don't think, that's your whole problem," she said. "Ryukyu's gonna kill you."
"Jokes on you, I was already dead inside."
Ryukyu walked up, arms crossed. "Mirko, bring him."
"On it." Mirko grabbed my collar and yanked me along.
Heroes were scattered everywhere, tending to injured civilians, securing the scene. A few side-eyes were thrown my way, but no one said anything yet. They were too busy. Endeavor stood nearby, flames still flickering around his shoulders. He didn't look at me.
Ryukyu didn't stop until we were behind a partially collapsed building, away from the main chaos. She turned, staring. "Explain."
"Explain what?" I said. "Being good at my job?"
"You don't have a job."
"Tell that to the bodies I left behind."
"You're an intern."
"Best intern you've ever had."
Mirko smirked. "Can't even argue."
Ryukyu sighed. "You ignored direct orders, engaged without clearance, and got caught beating the shit out of a person on 8K television."
As if on cue, a police van pulled up next to us. The back doors swung open, and a dog-headed cop stepped out. Chief Kenji Tsuragamae.
"Get in," he said.
I immediately ducked behind Mirko. "My mom said I shouldn't enter vans like this."
Mirko snorted. Ryukyu rubbed her temples. The chief was not amused. "This is not a request."
Mirko shrugged and stepped forward. "Alright, alright. No need to act like we ran over your dog."
Tsuragamae's eyes twitched. "Watch it, Usagiyama."
I leaned closer to Mirko. "Hey, is it racist if we—"
"Yes," she said immediately.
Ryukyu shot us both a look before stepping in. "Let's just handle this before it turns into something bigger."
I sighed and followed, sliding into the van with Mirko right behind me. The doors slammed shut, and the ride started.
Tsuragamae didn't waste time. "What the hell were you two thinking? Bringing an intern into a high-risk combat zone? Letting him engage a known killer?"
Ryukyu kept her voice level. "I didn't 'let' him do anything. He acted on his own."
Mirko smirked. "To be fair, he did handle himself better than some pros out there."
Tsuragamae glared at her. "That is not the point."
I shrugged. "Sounds like it should be. If I sucked, you would be scraping me off the pavement instead of dragging me into a lecture."
The chief's ears twitched. "You still talk, Midoriya. You are an intern. You do not have a license. You are not authorized to engage in combat under any circumstances. And yet—" He pulled out a tablet, tapped the screen, and turned it toward me. "Here you are. On every major news broadcast in the country. Fighting the Hero Killer."
The screen showed me mid-swing, bat colliding with Stain's ribs. A second clip rolled—me dodging, countering, slamming his head into the pavement. The headlines were either "UNKNOWN HERO INTERVENES" and "WHO IS THIS HANDSOME VIGILANTE?"
I grinned. "Damn. I look good."
Tsuragamae looked ready to throttle me. "You are not taking this seriously."
Mirko leaned back. "Oh, relax. The kid won, didn't he?"
Ryukyu sighed. "Mirko."
"What? If he got his ass kicked, I would be the first to yell at him. But he didn't." She gestured toward the tablet. "That's a clean takedown. No casualties, no extra damage. If anything, he saved us a bigger headache."
Tsuragamae growled. "That does not change the fact that this was reckless, unauthorized, and illegal." He turned back to me. "You do understand how much trouble you are in, correct?"
I checked my quest rewards.
[NEW PASSIVE UNLOCKED: DEVIL'S ADVOCATE – BOOSTS PERSUASION WHEN ARGUING AGAINST AUTHORITY, FLIPPING CONVERSATIONS IN YOUR FAVOR. ALSO SLIGHTLY ENHANCES INTIMIDATION WHEN MAKING WILD CLAIMS SOUND BELIEVABLE.]
I grinned. "I think I can talk my way out of it."
Tsuragamae's ear flicked. "Excuse me?"
I leaned forward. "Chief, let's be real here. You don't actually care that I fought Stain."
His eyes narrowed. "What are you talking about?"
I straightened up and put on my best "righteous citizen" face.
"Police Chief, a person in your position should look beyond what is in front of you. The alley where I fought against the Hero Killer was away from the main battlefield, toward Ryukyu's office. Did you think for a second that I wasn't looking for trouble but was actually on my way away from it? I was going back to the office, so I wouldn't burden pro heroes by lingering around when I was attacked by a serial killer. If you don't expect me to wash my ass and bend over for him, I believe the constitution classifies this as self-defense, and even if it wasn't, as a righteous citizen, I have the right to intervene when another's life is in danger. I saw two heroes about to be murdered by Cum Stain, and I was attacked."
Tsuragamae stared, ears twitching. "Did you just call him—"
I ignored him. "Furthermore, according to blabla law article…" I waved vaguely, "—citizen's emergency intervention… clause, I had a legal and moral obligation to step in. In the grand scheme of things, my actions were not only necessary but also legally protected under random number… some law that exists somewhere, probably."
Mirko muttered, "This dumbass is really bullshitting his way through legal defense."
Tsuragamae took a slow breath. "Let me get this straight. You, an unlicensed intern, are claiming you fought the Hero Killer out of moral duty?"
"That, and I didn't wanna die," I said. "Can't exactly let a guy monologue about 'true justice' while he's trying to turn me into a blood smoothie."
Ryukyu pinched the bridge of her nose. "Chief, this is going in circles."
Mirko grinned. "What's the worst that happens? He gets famous? Kid's got a point. If a hero did this, you would be pinning a medal to their chest."
Tsuragamae grumbled, flipping through his tablet. "It's not that simple. If we let this slide, it sets a precedent for vigilante actions."
I shrugged. "Then don't call it that. Call it a… 'Hero Internship Emergency Response Initiative.'"
"That is not a thing."
"It is if you say it is."
Mirko snorted. "Kid's got a point."
Ryukyu shot her a look. "You are not helping."
Tsuragamae exhaled sharply. "Enough. You're not in immediate trouble, but this is not over. You're going to be monitored, and if anything like this happens again—"
"Yeah, yeah, I get arrested, life's ruined, my mom cries, society collapses. Noted."
"Dismissed," he said through clenched teeth.
I turned to Mirko. "That went well."
She smirked. "Damn right it did."
Ryukyu sighed. "I need a drink."
We got out of the van, and I threw my arms up. "Let's get wasted!"
Ryukyu didn't even blink. "You committed enough crimes for one day."
I grumbled. "Fine, juice for me. Stupid adults and stupid rules."
Mirko stretched. "Could've gone worse."
"Could've gone better," Ryukyu muttered, pinching the bridge of her nose. "You're staying out of trouble for the rest of this internship. I don't care if an actual apocalypse starts, you are not setting foot in another fight without clearance."
"Blah blah rules, blah blah laws, random number legislation states that you can't have fun," I said, waving my hands.
Mirko snorted. "You know, if you actually learned how to talk properly, you could bullshit your way into politics."
"Why would I wanna do that? No one likes politicians."
Ryukyu started walking ahead. "At this rate, no one's gonna like you either."
"Cold, bitch, cold."
--
We made it back to the agency, and the second we stepped inside, I saw the news playing on the office TV. The footage of me absolutely wrecking Stain was on every channel. Close-ups of me swinging the bat. Clips of Stain spitting blood. The headlines ranged from "UNKNOWN HERO TAKES DOWN STAIN" to "WHO IS THIS HANDSOME VIGILANTE?"
Mirko grinned. "Damn, kid. You're famous."
Ryukyu crossed her arms. "He's infamous."
I squinted at the TV. "You think I can get endorsement deals?"
Ryukyu's glare could've peeled paint.
"Okay, okay, I'll wait for the legal issues to settle first. Geez."
She sighed. "I need to call the school before they see this and have a collective aneurysm."
Mirko flopped onto the couch. "Yeah, I'm not dealing with that. Lemme know if they start crying."
Ryukyu already had her phone out, walking off.
I flopped onto the couch next to Mirko. "Think I can spin this into a cool nickname?"
"Kid, the second they officially register your existence, your name's gonna be 'Public Menace.'"
"Better than 'Feral Gremlin.'"
She laughed. "Not by much."
I checked my system notifications.
"Nice, I leveled up."
Mirko raised a brow. "You what?"
"Nothing." I swiped the screen away.
A few minutes later, Ryukyu came back, looking like she aged ten years. "U.A. is getting flooded. Calls left and right. News stations, hero agencies, families of Stain's past victims. Everyone wants your info."
I stretched my legs on the couch. "Wow, I'm popular."
Mirko kicked my shin. "Popular's one way to put it. More like a pain in the ass."
Ryukyu dropped into a chair, rubbing her temples. "Nezu is handling it for now, but he is not happy."
I shrugged. "He's a talking rat, happiness probably ain't his default setting."
"Ryuu," she warned.
"Fine, fine," I said, waving her off. "What's the official story? Am I a hero in training, a vigilante, or an overgrown child with a bat?"
"All of the above," Mirko said.
Ryukyu shot her a look before turning back to me. "For now, they are keeping it vague. But if this keeps escalating, you are going to have to make a statement."
"Yeah, let me just go hold a press conference real quick," I said. "Hi, my name's Ryuu, and I beat the shit out of a serial killer. Any questions?"
Mirko snorted. "Might as well, it would save a lot of people the headache."
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You were the chosen one!
You were supposed to support me, not ghost me!
You were supposed to bring votes to the novel, not leave it in darkness!"
powerfully weeps into a mic
Stone me... before I fall to the Dark Side.
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