Memes are In the Chapter
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Three days later, Aizawa finally decided to bring up internships. He didn't bother with a long introduction, just leaned against his desk like he was already regretting this conversation.
"We are discussing internships today," he said. "And since half of you still don't know what that actually means, I brought people who do."
The door opened. Three figures walked in.
Blonde, in full sunshine mode, waved like this was the best day of his life. "Yo!"
Depression followed, staring at the floor like it could give him solitude.
A girl bounced in, eyes scanning the room before locking onto me.
"RYUUUUU!"
Before I could react, she shot forward, closing the gap in less than a second. Then my head was gone.
More specifically, it was gone inside her chest.
My entire world was suddenly engulfed in warmth and an unreasonable amount of energy as she buried my head in her chest like I was a lost puppy.
"RYUUUUU!" she practically sang, squeezing me like she was trying to crack my ribs. "Oh my gosh, it's you! You are real! You are right here! I can't believe this is the first time we are meeting!"
I pulled back just enough to breathe. "Yeah, it would be easier to believe if I wasn't suffocating."
I knew who this was. Blue hair, chaotic energy, zero regard for personal space... this had to be Nejire Hado. Mirko had described her as "bubbly, dangerous, and slightly unhinged." Ryukyu just called her "a natural disaster with pigtails."
And now she was holding me like a teddy bear she'd stolen from the void.
She ignored me and kept talking, her grip barely loosening. "I was so mad I didn't get to meet you during your internship! I was stuck on another mission, and then I came back, and Ryukyu and Mirko wouldn't shut up about you! Like, nonstop! It was Ryuu this, Ryuu that- 'Oh, that kid's gonna be a problem' - 'He's a little monster' - 'I kinda wanna adopt him' -"
I laughed between her bunnies. "That last one was definitely Mirko."
"It was!" Nejire whirled back to me. "She literally said that! I think she was serious, too!"
Izuku was vibrating in the corner like someone plugged him into a wall socket. "Big Three! Ryuu! Do you even understand... this is Nejire Hado! The Nejire Hado! The Big Three! She came in second at the last Sports Festival and-" He froze mid-rant. "Wait. She is hugging you. She is touching you. Why is she-" He looked personally offended by the laws of physics.
Nejire snapped her fingers. "Yes! Oh my gosh, Ryukyu! She was even worse! Kept talking about how she had never seen a first year be so terrifying before! I thought she was exaggerating, but nope, here you are! And you are shorter than I imagined!"
I deadpanned. "Thanks."
Kirishima grinned. "Damn, Ryuu, you are really out here getting talked about by top heroes."
"Yeah," Kaminari added. "Not even for good things, though."
"They are great things!" Nejire insisted, still holding onto my shoulders. "Do you know how impressive it is to make that much of an impact during your first internship? I mean, you have done crazy things!"
Nejire clapped her hands together, nodding like she had just pieced something together. "Oh, right! You took down Stain all by yourself! That was awesome!"
She grabbed my face, squishing my cheeks like I was some rare animal she had finally caught. "And you were sooo cool, but also, you have such a foul mouth - like, seriously, the stuff I heard you say? Wow. But you are also kinda cute, so I will let it slide!"
I pried her hands off. "Wow, thanks. Really needed that validation."
She gasped dramatically, completely ignoring me. "And this is my first time having a little brother! I wish I didn't miss you back then! We could have been the perfect duo!"
I sighed. "Right, because that would've ended well."
She nodded enthusiastically. "Obviously! I would've made sure you got into even more trouble, but in a fun way, not a 'wanted criminal' way!"
Mirio grinned. "You would've broken him."
Tamaki, who had been dead silent, muttered, "She breaks everyone."
Nejire turned to him, beaming. "And it makes them stronger!"
Mina leaned toward me. "She is literally you but if you were happy all the time."
"That is slander," I muttered. "I am the blueprint. She is the candy-coated expansion pack."
Kaminari nudged Kirishima. "Man, Ryuu got fans everywhere. First the pros, now the Big Three?"
"Dude, he is literally famous for pissing people off," Kirishima muttered. "It is kinda impressive."
Bakugo scoffed. "Tch. Shitty extra's been embarrassing himself so much, of course people talk about him."
Nejire gasped again, dramatically clutching her chest. "Excuse me?! That's my little brother you are talking about!"
Bakugo's eyebrow twitched. "He is not your—"
"Too late! Claimed him!" She latched onto my arm like a damn barnacle. "Sorry, little Pomeranian, you can't bully him anymore, I am his legal guardian now."
"Pomeranian?" Bakugo looked ballistic.
I sighed. "So, is this what today's gonna be? Just me getting harassed?"
Nejire tapped her chin, pretending to think. "Hmm. Yes!"
Mirio finally decided to step in before this went even further off the rails. "Alright, alright, we are getting a little off-topic here." He clapped his hands together, looking over the class. "We are here to talk about internships, and since you guys already have your provisional licenses, that means the stakes are a little higher than before."
Iida straightened in his seat. "Does that mean we will be expected to take on more serious tasks than our previous internships?"
Mirio nodded. "Exactly! Before, you were just there to observe and learn. Now? You will be working for real. You will get to step in during actual incidents... within reason, of course."
"Within reason?" Todoroki asked.
Tamaki spoke up from the side, voice low, almost whispering. "They won't throw you into a war zone or anything. But if you are working under a hero and something happens, you will be expected to act."
Izuku's eyes lit up. "So we will be able to help more people?"
Nejire grinned. "Yep! But also, you will be learning what it is really like out there. School training is great and all, but the real world doesn't follow a script."
Jiro leaned back. "So, what, we just go back to the same agencies as before?"
Mirio shrugged. "You can, but now that you got more experience, it is a good time to look for better fits."
Yaoyorozu looked thoughtful. "So it would be beneficial to consider different agencies based on our strengths and weaknesses."
Nejire snapped her fingers. "Exactly! Some agencies focus on rescue work, others on patrols, and some just do a little bit of everything."
Kirishima grinned. "Sounds awesome!"
Bakugo scoffed. "If you can actually get into a decent one."
Mirio chuckled. "That is true! Competition is tough, but that is what makes it fun."
Nejire turned back to me, eyes sparkling. "Sooo, Ryuu, where are you going? Back to Ryukyu?"
I pulled out my phone and scrolled through my messages. "I dunno, you tell me." I held up the screen for Nejire.
She grabbed the phone immediately, eyes scanning the text before grinning. "Ooooh, it's from Mirko!" Then she cleared her throat dramatically. "Ryuu. If you don't join my agency again, I will personally break into your dorm, drag you out by your ankle, and beat you in front of your classmates." She giggled. "Wow, she is so direct!"
She kept reading. "'Also, if you even think about another agency, I will crash through their office wall and steal you back. You are mine, brat. Deal with it.'"
Mina cackled. "Damn, she got it bad for you."
Jiro whistled. "That is aggressive."
Mirio shook his head. "That is just Mirko."
Nejire tapped the screen. "Oh, wait, there is more! 'P.S. If you ignore this, I am calling your mom. And if you think she can stop me, you are dead wrong. Also, send me those protein bar recommendations again.'" She looked up. "Wow, she really got this all planned out."
Kirishima laughed. "Hey, at least she wants you back! Must mean you did something right."
"Yeah," Kaminari grinned. "Or she just really likes bullying you."
"I think it is both," Sero added.
I asked my phone back, "Whatever. She pays well."
Nejire didn't give my phone back. Instead, she tapped away, then grinned.
"There! Now you have my number."
I held my hand out. "Great. Now give it back."
She ignored me and started scrolling. A second later, she gasped. "Oh my god, is this a meme folder?"
I sighed. "I am warning you, some shit in there is nasty."
"Oh, I have to see this." She flicked through the images, her expression shifting between amusement and horror. "What the hell is wrong with you?"
Mirio peeked over her shoulder. "Wow. That is… something."
Tamaki, who had somehow edged further away from the group without anyone noticing, muttered, "You shouldn't have done that."
Nejire laughed, still swiping. "Okay, some of these are funny, but some are...oh my god, what is that?"
I didn't even need to check. "You reached the cursed section. Turn back now."
"Nope, too late." She clicked on something and immediately recoiled. "OH NO."
"Ohhh, what is this?" Her voice had that sing-song curiosity, like she just discovered a goldmine.
Kaminari and Mina leaned in. "Yo, let's see."
"No, let's not," I said, reaching for my phone. Nejire yanked it away, dodging like she was in a goddamn game of keep-away.
Mina squinted at the screen. "Wait, is that—" She gasped. "No fucking way! Did you make a meme of Gang Orca during the exam?"
Kaminari howled. "Holy shit, you did! 'SeaWorld Denied Me a Tank'—bro, you are gonna get sued." (Check here)
Nejire flipped through more. "These are amazing! Wait, what is this one—OH. Oh my god."
The class turned, curious.
Nejire stared at me like I was a war criminal. "Ryuu."
"Yeah?"
"Why do you have a meme of Endeavor with the caption 'Worst Dad Olympics Winner, Five Years Running'?" (Check here)
Izuku choked on nothing. Todoroki didn't react, but I saw the corner of his mouth twitch.
Mina grabbed the phone. "WAIT, THERE IS MORE! 'World's First Walking Midlife Crisis!' Bro!" (Check here)
Kirishima coughed. "Dude, you are actually insane."
Jiro side-eyed me. "This is how you die, you know that, right?"
I shrugged. "Worth it."
Bakugo scoffed. "Tch. You got one of me?"
Nejire scrolled. "Hmm… oh, yeah, there's like... OH." Her eyes widened. "Oh wow. Oh my."
Bakugo snapped his head toward me. "What the fuck did you put?"
Nejire turned the phone around. On screen was a picture of Bakugo mid-yell, mouth open like he was about to commit homicide. The caption?
'Therapist: So tell me about your anger issues.
Bakugo: Explosions intensify (Check here)
The class erupted. Even Todoroki huffed a quiet laugh.
Bakugo twitched. "YOU FUCKING—"
I snatched my phone back before he could blow it to hell.
"You should be thanking me," I said. "This is peak internet culture."
He lunged. I dodged.
Nejire wiped fake tears. "I can't believe I almost missed out on meeting you. You are a national treasure."
Mina leaned on my shoulder. "No, no, he is a walking HR complaint."
Sero grinned. "Nah, he is both."
Aizawa cleared his throat, finally remembering he was supposed to be in charge. "Are you all done?"
I pocketed my phone. "For now."
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You enter the chamber.
You see a treasure chest.
Inside: Bonus Chapters.
But alas! A stone must be cast.
You roll…
a Natural 1.
You have failed the Voter's Saving Throw.
Now Ryuu the Chaotic Neutral Bard seduces your favorite NPC,
steals your gold,
and writes your entire backstory as an interlude chapter nobody asked for.
You want a critical hit?
Drop the Power Stone, you cursed goblin.
QUESTION: It has come to my attention that I been keeping secrets. Namely… what Ryuu wrote down as his official Quirk name. Let's hear the guesses!
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