My name is Akira.
And I died.
Not in some epic, dramatic way. Nope. I died eating cup noodles while watching a Naruto filler episode.
One second, I was vibing. The next? BOOM. Darkness.
And then... I woke up in the middle of a grassy field, surrounded by floating blue text.
> [Welcome, Villain of Prophecy.]
[Your job is to conquer the world. Good luck!]
Hold up—villain?
I barely finished high school. The last fight I had was with my internet provider. How the hell am I supposed to conquer anything?
As I stood there confused, still holding an imaginary noodle cup, a girl appeared. Long black hair, cold eyes, and a sword way too big for her size.
"Are you the Chosen Villain?" she asked.
I blinked. "Uh... maybe?"
She squinted, then sighed.
"You don't look evil."
"Thanks?"
---
Her name was Liria. Apparently, she's the "Heroine Assigned to the Villain." Some kind of moral babysitter. Her job is to keep me from destroying the world too quickly.
Joke's on her—I don't even know how to start.
She gave me a cloak, a rusty dagger, and a guidebook titled:
> "How to Be a Proper Villain – For Absolute Morons."
...I felt attacked.
---
As night fell, I stared at the stars, trying to understand what the hell was going on.
New world. New body. New job as a villain.
And worst of all?
No anime streaming.
God, what did I do to deserve this?
---
[To be continued in Chapter 2: Sword Girls and Moral Dilemmas]