Hell, he was the last alpha I wanted to interact with in any way.
Having put out his cigarette, Carter came closer to me. So that he was now standing right behind me and, even though he looked more closed off, I intuitively sensed what was creating the scar, a sure feeling that the alpha was already breaking even more.
"Maybe you should go to the hospital?" I asked, taking a small step towards the window. Already standing close to it. The main thing is, further away from Carter. "You don't look very well, and if you have more memories back, I think you, at the very least, need to go to a consultation."
"I have a lot of things to do right now," his palm lay on the window next to my waist. "But it can wait. First of all, you."
I froze, feeling that it seemed like he leaned towards my neck.
"What are you doing?" I asked nervously.
"When you were a kid, you mostly wore dresses," Carter's breath burned the skin next to my ear.
"Whatever you put on, that's what you wore," I said through tightly clenched teeth.
"Remember how you always got tangled up in them when we were running around the garden?" The alpha's voice became quieter and more dangerous because of that.
"I remember. You managed to catch me before I fell. Maybe you'll move away from me?" I leaned my elbow on the alpha's torso, but it seemed like I was trying to push the wall away.
"You baked cookies for me. In that room of ours, you always waited for my classes to end. You treated the abrasions. You often touched my hair with your fingers and told me about a world that was more than forbidden to me." Now Carter's words ran over my skin like hot coals, and I didn't like it at all.
"Go away," I tried to wriggle away. It didn't work. Carter immediately leaned against the glass on the other side, holding me in his arms as if in a trap. "What the hell are you squeezing me for?"
"Because I want to," his lips practically touched my ear, and I jerked from this as if a gun was held to my temple.
"What do you mean 'want'?" I asked again, gritting my teeth.
"You feel something too, right?" Carter put his hand on my lower back. This touch burned like boiling water, but I, taking advantage of the moment, immediately slipped to the side and walked away.
Carter remained standing in place, but turned his slow gaze to me. "You said it yourself that in childhood, I was more than just a part of your life. And at university, you said that you fell in love with me."
"What was I supposed to feel?" I stopped walking towards the sofa, but I tensed up so much that even my palms clenched into fists.
"In the past, we just had a childhood friendship. And here at university... I just didn't understand my feelings, because when I met Jad, I understood what love was, and I completely forgot about you, like an alpha."
Carter's features froze, and I took another step back, asking in horror: "Do you like me as a beta?" I wanted to laugh ironically because of this question, it seemed so idiotic.
Carter looked at me silently for a while, and under his gaze, I felt as if a fire had been lit under me and prepared for execution.
But, finally, putting his palms in the pockets of his sweatshirt and looking away towards the window, he asked: "Are you hungry?"
"Eat?" I asked again, frowning.
"Yes. You're not going anywhere anyway, but I'm not going to keep you hungry."
"Why am I not going anywhere?" My gaze darted involuntarily toward the door.
"Because I was lied to."
"But not me."
"Not you. My fiancée and her family were lying." A grin appeared on Carter's lips, and the hand he was currently holding on the table clenched into a fist. "And I want to sort this out, and you're the one who's going to help me do it."
Carter's words made me shudder, and my first impulse was to say that his life was none of my business and I certainly wasn't going to interfere with it, but I somehow held back these words and, with difficulty, overcame myself and answered:
"Okay. If you need me, I'll help," I bit the tip of my tongue, I looked away, and looked at the bookcase. For some reason, I had the feeling that I cursed myself with this phrase. "But right now, I really wouldn't refuse food."
"What do you want?" the alpha took his phone out of his sweatshirt pocket. He unlocked it.
"What's in the fridge? I'm not picky."
"I think it's okay. I'll order delivery."
"No need," I said, walking past Carter and heading toward the hallway. "I can just fry myself an egg. If you don't mind me starting to run your kitchen, of course."
It's not done that way. To come to someone else's house and use their kitchen. But I think we'll get through this somehow.
I only needed to walk a little way down the hallway to realize that I was lost. Several turns. Endless doors. Stopping and looking around, I didn't even realize which way the exit from the apartment was.
"Will you take me to the kitchen?" I asked, turning to Carter. All this time, he was walking behind me and, to be honest, it was creepy. First of all, from his gaze, which I felt even on my skin. Already on a physical level. At the same time, it constantly seemed to me that the alpha was gradually reducing the distance between us.
Carter nodded slightly to my question, and then we walked next to each other. Sometimes I deliberately tried to lag behind him a little, so that I could walk behind him, but he also slowed down at such moments.