Want to hear the truth? Everybody lies those who say they don't are lying. Like the breast that got exposed, the good cop who turned out to be a bad liar, we have the horney horn player who played out untill he was found out, a woman who pulled bunnies out of her...rabbit hole, how about the cancerous marriage, and finally war a story of truth and lies. It's all trues here and if it wasn't we would never tell you, on this chapter of 1000 Ways To Lie...
Date: April 8, 2006
Location: Southern Border, Ciudad Juárez, Chihuahua
A woman named roxie is addicted to Heroin, she would do anything or anyone for a nice spoonful of some Heroin. Her lousy drug dealer boyfriend has a plan. Roxie would go to Tijuana and get some fake boob implants, but she would smuggle Heroin inside of them. She heads to Tijuana and gets the "implants" each on stuffed with several grams of Mexican Brown Heroin, you could get high just by looking at her. All she needs to do is get passed the border. On her way to the border, Roxie is jonesing for a fix of Heroin. Before hitting the border she makes a stop at a restroom to suck some of that sweet milk out of her big new breast. She extracts some of the heroin from her breasts with a needle to get high, unknowingly spilling it all over her shirt. She gets to the border and is checked by the security guards. Security guards are like another guards, big boobs get noticed...but big boots leaking Heroin? Roxie might as well have had a giant flag on her car saying "arrest me please". She is taken into custody at the border never to deliver the goods.
Roxie got big and busty, when one of her breasts went bust, she got a-breast-ed...well make that...busted
Way To Lie #333: The Unaboober
Date: January 28, 2015
Location: Cameron, IL
A recently paroled convicted felon wants to fulfill his childhood dream to become a police officer, but because of his record, he has to falsify his records as an FBI agent to become one. Even though he is successful in apprehending numerous criminals, he is eventually found out by a local reporter in town who did a background check on him to ensure his credibility to see if he is an agent or not. The reporter then contacts the real FBI authorities and soon after he is arrested by the FBI. Due to his falsified records and the history of his convicted felony including the new charges of impersonation of an FBI agent, all the cases including the evidences he worked on are now considered equivocal and invalid, resulting in all the cases to be dropped and all criminals caught in those cases to be released. All the good he done went to...none...
Way To Lie #256: Phoney 5-0
Date: September 19, 2022
Location: Henrietta, TX
A man tells his shrewish, nagging wife he is dying of pancreatic cancer so he could get away from her, get her to stop nagging, and go out partying with his friends at strip clubs. He is exposed when his wife, skeptical of his story due to how much partying he was doing, she calls the hospital and finds out that he doesn't have cancer. Instead of divorcing him, she makes his life even more miserable untill the day he actually did die...
Way To Lie #178: Not So Slick...Rick
Date: May 24, 1999
Location: Leesburg, VA
What is about to happen is so...bad, so...wrong that it should be in our other book. A young woman schemes with her husband to make claims that a male rabbit impregnated her and that she reportedly gave birth to little bunny children. The couple had the townspeople fooled, but not the county medical examiner who saw the woman stick the bunnies into her vagina and tells the townspeople. The couple is ordered to pay all the money back and leave town immediately. She got...bunnied out...
Way to Lie #691: Bunnies In The Oven
Date: October 31, 1935
Location: St. Louis, MO
Billy Tipton is a saxophone player and wants to blend in with the popular male musicians, so she hides her identity by wrapping her breasts tightly and wearing a strap-on dildo at all times. 17 years later while having sex, she suffers a near heart attack. The woman she is having sex with opens her chest to reveal the truth, much to the surprise of the musician's adopted son. As a man he blew the sax but as a women she blew everybody's mind...
Way To Lie #212: Hey dad, nice rack!
Date: October 19, 1968
Location: Da Nang, Vietnam
Like most things you shouldn't believe it, this man is not an actual senator he is a con artist. Even worse he is a con artist who specializes in false identities, but fate steps in, he checks his mail and finds out he has been drafted into the Vietnam War. During the war, he steals the ID tags of a deceased army surgeon and inadvertently takes up the responsibility of amputating the limbs of wounded soldiers. The con artist was blessed with the gift photographically memory, he reads a medical book and performs surgery. The con artist is surprisingly competent at his job and when confronted by the parents of the dead surgeon, he concocts a story that results in the late son being revered as a war hero. Today the con artist learned some lies can be real life savers...
Way To Lie #884: Smooth Operator