"Where would he have gone to?" I asked myself as I trail along the flower paths hoping to bump into him but alas he was no where to be found, it's more like he moved away like lightening.
I was making my way back to my room when I felt a movement behind me and lo he was standing behind me all this while whilst maintaining silence. I looked at him with so much longing and I could swear I saw something like desire in his eyes but then I can't really say since I'm only sure of what only I can feel for the past hours he arrived to assume his new post.
"Do you need anything ma'am?" He asked.
"How long have you been following me?" Was what escaped from my mouth and immediately I wished I didn't say that because in all honesty I was the one tailing him.
"I'm sorry ma'am but I was not following you". He retorted.
" What then are you doing behind me"I asked again with guilt eating me up.
" I was just passing by and it's just a mere coincidence" He answered.
Did he just talk back at me or I am I mistaken? This one must really be outspoken, something I lack. I better get back in before I make a mess of myself, as I can see he is not backing out, I have to look for something to make him stutter and here It is.
" Why did you lie to me about the way you got the vacancy information,my Father just told me that you came highly recommended but that was not what you told me before now?"
"I..."
Oh here it is, he stutters!!
"I'm sorry ma'am I didn't think it was necessary "
" Ok,
,but honesty is a little better than your thought "
I went back in so I don't give myself away.
I was so taken aback by his sharp responses but then,he is the kind of Man that I like or maybe I should say person because I have never really felt this way for any man before now and to tip it all he is not a pushover just like me.
"Uuuughhh" I heard my self impulsively screaming into the pillow. My body,my brain,my head,they are all against me and now my heart.
As the days goes by, I watched my fantasy every single day,helplessly fantasizing and wishing that we have met in another circumstance,may be then there would have been a chance that he will feel the same way I feel right now and I won't be the one chasing and wishing.
But then again what will my Parents and the folks think of me if they find out that I have fallen for a servant in my household, I know for now it's only the priest that is aware and I very much know that he won't spill my confession to any body but I can't help, but notice his stares during the mass and I bet he wanted to come over and question my decision after the last time we met but I tried as much as possible to avoid crossing path with him after the mass.
I hurriedly went inside my Father's car so I don't get to exchange pleasantries among the folks and I could sense my soon to be suitor eyeing me but I don't really care. In order words I really want us to get home as fast as possible so I can't see my heartbeat. Oh God please forgive me ,I really can't help it. Ever since he came into our household sleep has eluded me ,I find myself hoping earnestly for daybreak and hoping he will be the first person I see every morning. As the days go by I was growing paranoia as a result of what awaits me,but the thoughts of him kept me going. And now it's Sunday just like the snap of a finger and tomorrow is the d' day.