Okami's POV
Next day
The next morning, as I put on my shoes, Rentarou gave me a concerned look.
"Okami, you okay?"
"Yeah, I'm fine. Let's go, or we'll be late for college," I said, tightening my laces.
Rentarou nodded, though he didn't seem convinced. We left for college in silence.
Even in class, I couldn't focus. The professor's voice faded into the background as my sister's words kept repeating in my head—
"No one will ever stay by your side. Anyone who does will only regret it in the future."
"Whoever stays with you will just suffer."
"And what's with your smile? Always smiling like an idiot—"
"What's with your voice? It was already garbage. Ugh, my ears hurt just hearing you!"
I clenched my fists under the desk, my nails digging into my palm.
Why does it still hurt?
I already knew how she felt about me. I shouldn't be surprised. But still… something about the way she said it, the sheer disgust in her voice, made my chest feel unbearably tight.
I let out a quiet breath, trying to shake it off, but it clung to me like a shadow.
"Okami," Rentarou whispered from beside me. "You good?"
I blinked, realizing I'd been staring blankly at my textbook without turning a single page.
"Yeah," I muttered, closing the book. "I'm fine."
But even I didn't believe my own words.
I stumbled into the washroom, locking the stall behind me as my breaths came out ragged and uneven.
"Hah… huh… huh…"
My chest burned, each breath feeling heavier than the last. My hands trembled as I clutched at my shirt, gripping the fabric over my heart.
"Why… why does it hurt so much?"
Her words, her gaze—so cold, so disgusted—kept playing in my head like a broken record.
"You have some nerve showing up here."
"What face were you planning to bring in front of me?"
"No one will ever stay by your side."
"Whoever stays with you will just suffer."
"You shouldn't even exist."
I squeezed my eyes shut, but it didn't stop. It didn't stop. The image of her tossing away the pancakes flashed before me again.
"I made them with my own hands… I poured everything into them. My respect, my feelings, my hopes… but she didn't even look at them before throwing them away."
A sharp sting shot through my chest. I clutched at my heart tighter, my nails digging into my skin through the fabric.
"It hurts... it hurts so much!"
My body shook as I leaned against the wall, my forehead resting against the cold tiles. My breath hitched as something hot rolled down my cheeks.
"I shouldn't have gone… I shouldn't have hoped."
"I shouldn't exist."
Splash!
I splashed cold water on my face, letting it drip down as I took a shaky breath. My reflection stared back at me from the mirror—red eyes, pale face. I looked exhausted.
"Get a grip, Okami."
After a moment, I wiped my face, straightened my posture, and walked out of the washroom. Step by step, I made my way toward the classroom, trying to push down the weight in my chest.
But then I stopped.
Just ahead, Rentarou was talking to someone. A girl.
Takahashi Usagi.
The girl from the library.
I instinctively stepped back, pressing myself against the wall at the corner of the hallway. My heart pounded—not from nerves, but from something colder.
"I shouldn't be seen."
If anyone saw her with me… if they knew she talked to me… what if she got judged? What if she got bullied? What if just being associated with me ruined something for her?
I didn't want anyone to suffer because of me.
So I waited.
Waited for them to finish talking.
Waited for Usagi to leave.
"I… I'm not disgusted because I don't know the truth."
I stiffened.
"I don't know if those rumors are real or not, so I don't feel anything like hatred toward him."
My breath caught in my throat. Liar.
I had heard it all before. People pretending to be kind, pretending to care, only to leave when the weight of my past became too much. She would be the same. She had to be.
But then… she said it.
"It's just… his eyes."
My hands curled into fists at my sides.
"When I saw his eyes… they weren't the eyes of someone cold or toxic." Her voice softened, carrying a weight I wasn't prepared for. "They were the eyes of someone who had lost the will to move forward… someone who had lost everything."
My heart stopped.
She saw through me.
How?
I swallowed hard. My chest tightened painfully.
Why… why is she saying this?
And what will you do if those rumors turn out to be true? Rentarou asked.
I braced myself for her hesitation. For the fear.
But instead—
"I… I don't believe in those rumors!"
I inhaled sharply.
What is she saying?
How can she say that so easily?
She barely knows me. She only met me once
"That's a bold statement," Rentarou said, skepticism in his voice.
I pressed my back against the wall, willing myself to move—to leave before I heard something that would break me even more.
But her voice kept pulling me back.
"There's no way I read his eyes wrong."
I squeezed my eyes shut.
Why? Why does she sound so sure?
Rentarou chuckled softly. "You're a strange one, Takahashi Usagi."
I can't let this continue.
I turned away, forcing my feet to move.
She needs to stop.
Because if she keeps looking at me like that…
I might start believing her.
I didn't know what to feel.
I had spent so long being hated, being feared… that kindness felt foreign. Unfamiliar.
Dangerous.
I turned and walked away before my heart could waver any further.
My body tensed the moment Rentarou's gaze flickered toward me.
And then—her eyes followed.
The second she spotted me, her face lit up with a warmth I hadn't seen in what felt like forever. A genuine, radiant smile.
"Oh! Kurokawa-kun!" she called out, her voice carrying across the hallway with an unexpected brightness. "I was looking for you!"
Before I could even think about running, she was already walking toward me, closing the distance between us.
I stood frozen.
Why? Why was she smiling like that?
Didn't she know who I was?
Didn't she realize what being near me would do to her?
But she didn't hesitate. She didn't stop.
"Ah, Ku—uhm… Okami-kun!" She used my first name, tilting her head slightly, as if testing the way my name sounded.
I barely had time to process it before she continued, her enthusiasm unwavering.
"Do you remember me? We met in the library the day before yesterday! I handed you The Tale of the Heike!"
She looked at me expectantly, eyes shining with something I couldn't quite understand.
I opened my mouth—
But no words came out.
"Uh… it might sound strange, but… Okami-kun, is it okay if I call you by your first name?"
Her voice was soft, yet unwavering, and the smile she wore—warm and unguarded—was unlike anything I had seen directed at me in a long time.
I glanced at Rentarou, half-expecting him to step in, to say something, but he just stood there, watching.
I hesitated.
Then, before I even realized it, I nodded.
Crap. Why did I nod?
What would people think if they found out she was calling me by my first name? If they knew she was on such familiar terms with me?
I opened my mouth to correct myself, to tell her no—
But before I could, she smiled even brighter and said,
"Ah, it might be a bit strange to ask since we barely know each other, but… Okami-kun, I'd like to be your friend!"
Huh?
Does she even realize what she's saying?
Why?
Even after hearing all the rumors about me, shouldn't she feel hatred? Disgust?
She says she doesn't believe them… but still!
My own family didn't believe in me. They turned their backs without hesitation.
Then why?
Why can a complete stranger see through me?
Why?
My chest tightened, a lump forming in my throat. It had been so long since I felt this kind of warmth—so long that it almost hurt. My vision blurred for a moment, but before I could dwell on it, she simply lifted her hand, holding out a lunchbox.
"I brought lunch for you!" she said cheerfully.
I blinked at her in disbelief.
"You know," she continued, "my dream is to become a chef—someone who brings joy to people's lives through good food!"
She laughed lightly, her voice carrying a warmth I wasn't used to.
"I saw you in the cafeteria the other day… You ate like the food had no taste at all."
She pouted slightly, as if genuinely concerned.
"So, I thought I should remind you—food is meant to bring joy! Hehe~ it always works for me!"
Ah… right. Food.
I had almost forgotten.
I'm also used to pour everything—my feelings, my gratitude, my respect, my love, my care—into the food I made.
Because Mom once told me…
"If you want your feelings to reach someone's heart, a good meal made with love is more than enough."
I don't know why, but those words came back to me now.
Rentarou, sensing my hesitation, finally tried to step in.
"Ah, Usagi-chan, he won't be eat—"
Before he could finish, I grabbed the lunchbox from her hands.
Because I knew.
I knew how much it hurt when you made something for someone, only for them to not even bother opening it.
Her eyes widened slightly in surprise before softening again.
And then—
That same warm smile.
Like she already knew I would take it.
...
Present Day
"Okami… Okami… O-K-A-M-I-kun!!!"
Usagi's voice snapped me out of my thoughts. I blinked, realizing she was holding my manuscript, her brows furrowed in concern.
"Your eyes are teary… What happened? What were you thinking about?"
I quickly wiped my eyes and forced a small chuckle. "Oh, nothing. When you mentioned our first encounter, I just remembered… the lunchbox you brought me that day."
"Hehehe~ You liked it so much that you cried!" she teased, grinning.
"Yeah… I did," I admitted, a small smile tugging at my lips. "I can still taste the warmth."
Before she could respond, I leaned in closer, just enough for her breath to hitch, and whispered against her ear—
"I love you too, Usagi-chan."
Her entire face turned bright red, her hands flying to her cheeks as she stammered, "A-ah-wha-wha-wha—what are you doing, BAKA OKAMI! Baka! Baka! Baka!!!"
She pushed me back by my chest, her flustered expression priceless.
The café fell into silence as every single person turned to stare at us.
…Oops.