First things first: walking. Should be easy, right? Two legs, balance, a little waddle—simple.
Wrong.
The moment he tried to take a step, his new, oversized claws dug into the dirt, and his tail—his new tail—swung like a wrecking ball, nearly knocking him off his feet. He flailed, barely catching himself, and let out a noise that could only be described as an undignified squawk.
«Okay. Not as great as I thought.»
He steadied himself, took another step. This time, he adjusted for the tail. Another step. Then another. And just like that, he was moving. Awkwardly, sure, but moving.
He took a deep breath and flexed his claws, feeling the raw power in his limbs. His new body was strong. Agile. Efficient. He crouched low, then jumped—
swish
He launched at least ten feet into the air, completely overshooting his mark, flailed midair like a malfunctioning jetpack, and crashed face-first into a bush.
«Alright- never doing that again.» He spat out a leaf and shook himself off.
Now that mobility was sort of handled, he took in his surroundings. The place looked like a nature documentary before humans started bulldozing everything. The trees were as massive as a skyscrapper. Ferns the size of couches sprouted everywhere, and weird, alien flowers oozed some kind of iridescent goo.
The noises was just as exotic.
Not the deep, bellowing roars Hollywood had promised. No, these prehistoric beasts had the vocal range of dying bagpipes. Some honked like angry geese. Others screeched like they were in a horror movie. One in the distance let out a noise so ungodly it sounded like a kazoo having a fight with a blender.
He sighed. «As I expected, these guys are like birds.»
Which made sense. After all, hippos had skulls that looked like demonic kaiju skeletons, but in reality, they were just chunky water cows. Dinosaurs probably faced a similar situation. Anybody is scary enough- if you look from the bones
Still, no time to dwell on scientific misunderstanding. He had bigger problems—like the whole stranded-in-the-past-with-no-idea-what-to-do-next situation.
He plopped down onto a log, staring at the horizon. «Alright, let's think. I intended to go ten minutes into the past. Instead, I got launched into dino era from 66 million years ago. Given how wildly this machine screwed up, another failure might kill me. Or worse—turn me into a trilobite or something.»
That alone should've made him panic, but then he thought about it. Dinosaurs went extinct long before humans even showed up. Meaning? No major butterfly effect would that could erase civilization. His future wife, his phone, his WiFi? is Still going to exist.
Small victories.
But that still left one massive question.
«What the hell do I do now?»
«Plan A, Go straight for the machine maybe?» he first considered in a heartbeat but was quickly swayed by his logic.
That thing crashed way past the mountains. There were likely predators, obstacles, and who knows what kind of prehistoric nightmares lurking in between. Charging in blind was a way to get yourself killed.
«Plan B. Say screw it, leave the machine, and just... live here?» random thought pops out but he also dismissed that. he can't give up just like that.
Yeah. No. He was not about to settle down in a time period that doesn't have a toilet. skibidi or not, he needed them.
«Plan C. get something like tools or ally, survive, then plan for extraction.» he thought of another way.
Not ideal, but logical. Rushing in without resources was suicide. If he wanted any shot at getting back, he needed a strategy.
He exhaled through his nostrils—flaring them way more dramatically than expected. «Right. Step one- don't die.»
His stomach immediately growled. Forcing him to change his plan
«okay, new step one.. don't starv.»
He thought back to The Book. The book that every nerd with fear of civilization collapse had read at some point—"How to Rebuild Society from Scratch." It had everything. survival tactics, fire-starting techniques, how to manufacture aspirin. He could picture the pages flipping through his brain.
Then he looked around.
The terrain was garbage. Thick forests, alien-looking plants with wood color and pores like they breath, and—oh yeah—he had no idea what was poisonous in this time period. If he ate the wrong thing, he'd find out real fast if velociraptors could get food poisoning. He knew method that could dicern some stuff but that could only work in his original, human-body.
«So, Plan B... watch the locals.» He decided.
He crouched low, scanning the area. A herd of duck-like dinosaurs waddled by, honking at each other in a way that was weirdly similar to gossiping neighbors. A smaller, feathery predator was perched on a log, lazily sunbathing like it had zero responsibilities.
Okay. So far, it looks like another one of those National Geographic episode.
But then a realization hit him.
If he wanted to get that machine back? He couldn't do it alone.
He needed allies. Manpower. Dinosaurpower. more specifically a pack of velociraptor.
It made perfect sense. Strength in numbers, safety, and they would know how to survive in this world better than he did. If he could integrate himself, become alpha—then he would have a small army at his command.
The question was how. and that's when he spotted it.
A Quetzalcoatlus—one of the biggest flying creatures to ever exist. lying on the ground, injured. One of its wings was bent at a bad angle, and it looked like it had crash-landed. With how dirty it was.
His machine had hit something when it came to this era. and it was this fellow right here.
«...Well, crap.»
He hesitated for a moment before letting out a sigh. «I guess you're coming with me, big guy»
Carefully, he approached the massive creature, trying his best not to get his face pecked off. The Quetzalcoatlus eyed him, but it was too exhausted to even move.. That made things easier for him.
Grunting, he lifted the injured creature onto his back. It was harder than expected, but his raptor muscles held strong.
He took one last look at the distant mountain, where his machine had crashed. It was far. Too far. But he know he'll get there.
He had to.
Because if he didn't?
He was going to be the first time traveler in history to get permanently stuck as an oversized murder chicken.
And that was not gonna be an option.