"How does your superpower even work? It's so cool!" Banner exclaimed, completely lacking the self-awareness one might expect from the Incredible Hulk. He was full of praise for Saiki Kusuo.
Peter, having webbed the assailants together, asked, "Kusuo, what should we do with these guys?"
Even though Banner was the oldest of the three, both he and Peter habitually deferred to Saiki Kusuo's judgment.
"I've already contacted SHIELD. Let them handle it."
Not long after, SHIELD agents arrived and took the criminals away. Peter watched the agents depart, not with excitement, but with a thoughtful expression.
"Speaking of which, why didn't SHIELD take Dr. Banner with them?" Peter couldn't help but ask.
Saiki Kusuo pointed to Banner, who was sitting quietly and harmlessly on the sofa. "Geniuses get special treatment." Just like my brother.
Peter, still confused, asked, "So?"
"So, small-time crooks aren't worth the big boss's time. It takes a SHIELD heavyweight to show the proper respect."
"Oh." Peter nodded, though he only half-understood.
The fact that those guys knew their address, however, annoyed Saiki Kusuo. While his brother, Kusuke, would take care of the aftermath, he wanted to minimize any danger to his parents.
Moreover, the attackers targeting Banner were Hydra agents. Saiki Kusuo didn't know much about the organization, but he'd gleaned from SHIELD's inner thoughts that they were a serious threat.
And then there was Loki, a god from Asgard, a prime target for SHIELD. Supposedly, he had a severe case of chuunibyou and was wielding the Tesseract to declare war on all humanity.
Saiki Kusuo found the whole situation incredibly tiresome. Saving the world was a headache best left to SHIELD.
Most importantly, he absolutely couldn't let Peter find out. Otherwise, the kid would be thrilled to fight him for three hundred rounds.
Unfortunately, his hopes were destined to be dashed.
The next day, the god from Asgard, the chuunibyou patient bent on world domination, Loki, appeared on the news.
He stood atop a flight of stairs, arms outstretched, and bellowed at the pedestrians below. "Kneel before me, you foolish mortals!"
Saiki Kusuo: "…"
Peter: "Is this a TV show? What show would have such a corny scene these days?"
Banner picked up the remote. "Let's change the channel. This is boring."
The trio, enjoying their after-dinner desserts, switched channels, only to be greeted by the same flamboyantly dressed figure.
How old are you?
The onlookers below, upon hearing Loki's chuuni declaration, all pulled out their phones.
Bystander A: "What is this, a punishment for losing a game of Truth or Dare? Haha, this is hilarious!"
Bystander B: "Foolish mortals? Is he really roasting himself like this? I'm recording this and uploading it to Facebook."
Bystander C: "Hello, is this the mental hospital? There's a mental patient who's escaped. Please come and get him."
Loki, overhearing every word from the crowd: "???"
What's going on? This isn't how it's supposed to go!
Shouldn't these humans be weeping in terror and begging for mercy?
Enraged by the mockery, Loki telekinetically grabbed a person and, with a flick of his wrist, snapped their neck. He threw the corpse into the crowd, finally making the onlookers realize this guy was serious.
"I'll give you one more chance! Kneel and submit to me, or be crushed like this ant!"
Trembling with fear, people began to kneel before him. Loki, having successfully intimidated the humans, wore a satisfied smile.
"Kusuo!" Peter's smile vanished, and he called out to his friend.
"I know." Faced with a matter of principle, Saiki Kusuo wasn't as nonchalant as usual. He teleported Peter and Banner to Loki's location.
"That bastard! I'm going to make him kneel before the people he needlessly killed and beg for forgiveness!" Peter declared furiously as he put on his suit.
"While I agree with your sentiment, he's a god, Peter. Don't be reckless. We just need to stall until SHIELD arrives." Seeing Peter getting ready to jump into the fray, Saiki Kusuo, fearing his impulsiveness, cautioned him.
Without the television screen as a barrier, Saiki Kusuo could use his telepathy on Loki. He knew the scepter in Loki's hand could control minds. Against the cunning and experienced Loki, the simple and impulsive Peter was vulnerable.
Wait, I almost forgot about that high combat power.
"Hey, Peter. You're in charge of evacuating the civilians."
"Huh? Are you going to take him on yourself, Kusuo?"
"Of course not. We have a much stronger fighter." Saiki Kusuo pointed to Banner, who blinked in confusion, unaware of the plan.
Loki, currently exerting his dominance over the ordinary humans, only heard a roar behind him before a fierce blow landed on his left cheek.
BOOM!
Unable to dodge, Loki was sent flying by a slap from the transformed Hulk, crashing into a wall several meters away.
Peter grabbed a megaphone and shouted to the crowd, "Please cooperate with me and leave the area in an orderly fashion!"
At the same time, Saiki Kusuo was using his telepathy to calm the crowd, preventing a panic.
Loki was nowhere to be seen, pinned deep within the wall. The enraged Hulk then turned his attention to Peter and Saiki Kusuo.
The roaring Hulk charged towards Peter.
"Damn it!" Peter did a backflip in the air, dodging the Hulk's fist. He turned his head to complain to Saiki Kusuo. "You could have easily dealt with that chuuni god with your powers. Why did you bring out the Hulk?"
Saiki Kusuo remained unmoved by the question. He simply caught the Hulk's fist and, before the Hulk could make another move, called out, "Hulk."
The rampaging Hulk stopped. His animalistic instincts made him wary of Saiki Kusuo. Then, Saiki Kusuo gave him a very arrogant and dangerous look.
"If you keep rampaging, I won't hesitate to throw you back on that little island, all day long!"
Hulk: "…"
"It's covered in my psychic powers. You won't be able to escape."
Hulk: "…"
Even without his intellect, the Hulk sensed a hint of danger. He roared, beat his chest, and then ran towards Loki's location.
Peter, witnessing the scene unfold, was dumbfounded. He gave Saiki Kusuo a thumbs-up. "Amazing, Kusuo! You're like a beast tamer."
(I'm not a beast tamer. I just exploited his weakness.)
Banner and the Hulk, with their polar opposite personalities, had identical likes and dislikes.
The crowd had been evacuated, and the battle between the Hulk and Loki was nearing its end. Or rather, it was a one-sided beatdown. Loki, completely defenseless, was being brutally pummeled by the Hulk. He gasped for breath and let out an arrogant declaration as a god, attempting to intimidate the Hulk. But the Hulk saw it as the dying struggle of a weak god and punched him into the concrete.
Peter, who had witnessed the entire process, made a gesture of crossing himself, unable to bear watching. "Amen."
The sound of familiar footsteps approached. Saiki Kusuo signaled to Peter. "The clean-up crew is here. It's time to go."
He then turned his gaze to the Hulk, who was having a great time playing whack-a-mole. "Time to go, Hulk."
The Hulk, reluctant to leave, gave Loki one last smack before obediently following Saiki Kusuo.
SHIELD agents surrounded the area. Captain America, who had been persuaded by the director of SHIELD, arrived as well.
This man, whom Kusuke jokingly called "still beautiful after being frozen for decades," was wearing his combat suit, holding his shield, and approaching them righteously.
Perhaps it was because Saiki Kusuo looked so ordinary and harmless, like an innocent bystander caught in the crossfire, compared to the massive and ferocious Hulk and the strangely dressed Peter.
Captain America complained into his earpiece to Coulson. "Didn't you say it was just Loki? Why does he have help?"
Coulson, seeing the Hulk's figure on the screen, felt a massive headache coming on. He explained with difficulty to his idol, "No, that's actually…"
Before he could finish, Steve had already thrown his shield at the Hulk. The provoked Hulk was instantly intrigued.
(Good grief, I seem to be misunderstood.)
Saiki Kusuo had no intention of getting involved with Steve, nor did he feel like explaining. He reached out to the Hulk and Peter and used his teleportation.
Because the Hulk hadn't calmed down yet, he couldn't take him home. So Saiki Kusuo brought them to his private island.
Peter, learning it was Saiki Kusuo's private island, looked around excitedly, thinking it was incredibly cool. The Hulk, however, shrunk back, looking like a multi-ton child throwing a tantrum, and protested to him.
"You lied! You said you wouldn't throw me on the island!"
"I didn't lie! I said I wouldn't leave you on the island alone. Now we're all here with you, what's there to be afraid of?" Saiki Kusuo said, lying without a hint of guilt.
The Hulk scratched his head, feeling like something was wrong with that sentence, but he couldn't quite put his finger on it and was easily fooled.
While waiting for the Hulk to calm down and turn back into Banner, Peter asked Saiki Kusuo about Loki's condition.
"What happened to that chuuni god? Did the Hulk finish him off?"
Saiki Kusuo, monitoring SHIELD's movements, shook his head. "He escaped. Also, Loki suffered a loss at the Hulk's hands. With his temper, he'll definitely come looking for trouble. Be careful when you go home. I'll also keep an eye on Aunt May while you're at school."
"Thanks, Kusuo." When it came to the safety of his family, Peter accepted without hesitation.
By this time, Banner had calmed down. Seeing the devastated island, he crouched down weakly. "Did I lose control again?"
His memory stopped at the point where he arrived in a downtown area; he had no recollection of his transformation. But he could imagine the dangerous things he might have done while out of control.
Just as Banner was berating himself, Peter, noticing he was awake, came over and gave him a thumbs-up. "Good job, Banner! Oh, and Hulk."
Banner: "???"
"When I think about that chuuni god Loki being hammered into the concrete by you, unable to get out, I can't help but laugh."
Banner: "…"
"You and Hulk are both amazing!"
So, what exactly did I do after transforming?
Banner, receiving praise for the first time after transforming, was completely bewildered.
Just as Peter was praising Banner to the high heavens, Saiki Kusuo, who was monitoring SHIELD, suddenly spoke. "It's time to go back. The person coming to pick you up has arrived, Banner."