ELI
It's been two years since we moved to Russia, and honestly, things have become pretty routine. At first, I wasn't sure how I'd fit in, but time has a way of smoothing things over. I spent the first few months just trying to survive getting used to the language, the culture, and of course, the bullying. But now? It's different. I'm just another kid in class, like everyone else.
Russia is still strange in some ways, but I've come to learn how to navigate it. The language isn't a barrier anymore, and I understand the social cues. I've made a few friends, although, truthfully, I never got too close to any of them. I've learned to keep people at arm's length. It's just easier that way. You'd think living in a new country would be harder, but I've managed. College life is no different than high school in that respect people still stare, still whisper, but no one really bothers me anymore. They just know me as Eli, the foreign kid who's here to get an education, nothing more, nothing less.
My dad, Juseon Seo, is still caught up in his work most of the time, though he's always around when I need him. It's not like we don't talk, but we don't have those deep conversations that other fathers and sons might have. He's doing his best, but I think we're both just figuring things out as we go. He's busy trying to make a life here for us, and I'm busy trying to get through school and figure out what I want. We've fallen into a routine, and I guess that's just how it is for now.
And then there's Damir. He's still around, like a fixture in our lives. He comes over regularly, often with new gifts for me clothes, watches, all the latest trends. At first, it was a bit much, but after a while, it became normal. I didn't need the gifts, but I didn't say anything because he meant well. He just wanted to make sure I was comfortable, make sure I had everything I needed. He's been my dad's best friend for years, and I've gotten used to him being a part of my life. He's not just a friend of my dad's; he's become someone I can talk to, though it's mostly about school, life in Russia, and sometimes, just random stuff. He doesn't push too much, doesn't try to act like a father figure. He just wants to be there, which, I suppose, is enough.
Our conversations aren't anything extraordinary. We talk about what's going on at school, what's happening with college, how things are going in Russia, and sometimes we even discuss random things like movies or music. It's simple stuff, but it's nice. It's familiar. I know Damir cares, even if he doesn't say it directly. He shows it in the little things buying me the latest hoodie that everyone is wearing or making sure I'm not falling behind in schoolwork.
I guess he's always wanted to help in his own way, and at this point, it's just part of the rhythm of our lives. Sometimes I wonder how he has the time to do it all, but he's always been the type to throw himself into taking care of people. I never really questioned it.
It wasn't like we were always close, though. Sure, we talked, but I never really opened up to Damir. It's not that I didn't like him, it's just that I had my own things going on. I had my friends, and I was still adjusting to life here. But over the years, it became clear that Damir just cared. He wasn't trying to be my father, he was just trying to help me get used to living here.
The bullying didn't stop, of course. The other kids at school still made their snide remarks, but after a while, it wasn't a big deal. I just ignored it. They eventually got bored with it. I wasn't the same kid I was when we first moved here. I didn't let it get to me anymore. They called me names, whispered about me behind my back, but I didn't care. I was busy focusing on my studies and my life here
Things have just moved on. The bullying wasn't personal; I realized it was just the way kids are. Everyone has something to pick on, and I was no different. But they stopped after a while, and now, I'm just another student at university. Nobody really talks about me anymore, and I'm fine with that.
In the meantime, I've focused on getting better at Russian, at making friends who don't care about where I'm from, and just surviving the college years. Life isn't perfect, but I'm not complaining. It's manageable.
As for my dad, he's still the same, working hard, always out of the house, but always checking in to make sure I'm okay. I've gotten used to him being distant. It's not that he doesn't care, it's just that we both know our roles. He works hard, and I take care of myself. We don't talk about our feelings much, but I know he's there if I need him. And, for what it's worth, that's enough for me.
And so, life goes on. I'm not sure where it's headed yet, but I'm starting to figure out my place in this strange country. The next few years might be hard, but I'm ready for whatever comes my way. It's been a long road, but it's been mine to walk.