Keifer's POV
I got home without even realizing it. I stayed in the basement where we usually hang out.
I went straight to the mini bar and grabbed a bottle of liquor. I didn't even bother checking the brand. I just drank it straight to ease the heaviness in my chest.
But the alcohol is useless. Even if I drink every bottle down here, it still wouldn't change how I feel.
Angelo is right. I have to push Jay-jay away from me—but I need to be numb to do it. I might be the first to give in once I see her hurting.
But I really can't do it. I'd give up my life. If I go through with this, it would be the death of me.
"Kuya..." someone called.
I turned around to check. It was Keigan, walking slowly in the dark.
"It's late... you should go to sleep," I said in a calm voice.
"I've already slept too much. Maybe I'll go back to the room later," he said, forcing a smile. "...Do you have a problem? Why are you still up and drinking?"
The way Keigan speaks confuses me. He's too far from the Keigan I talked to this morning. He sounds... normal.
"Same things, of course," I answered.
There are times when I tell him my problems. I don't want him to feel like I'm drifting away from him or from him and Keiren. So as long as I can tell him, I do. But there are times that I have to shut my mouth.
I walked over to him and invited him to sit on the floor. We leaned against the back of the couch to be more comfortable. When we're in this position, we're just like normal brothers.
"How is your day?" I asked him.
It's been a while since I last asked how he was. Honey was right about what she told me this morning.
"I slept for a whole day." He answered and laughed briefly. "...How about you?"
I shook my head. "Not good."
"Why?"
"Things are being fvcked up."
"Do you feel pressured? You don't have to rush. You still have a month to think about it."
"That's not the only thing I'm worried about." I looked down and shook the bottle of alcohol in my hand.
"Is it about her?"
Keigan's voice suddenly sounded disappointed. I know he doesn't like Jay-jay. For him, she was a obstacle.
"Yes, it's about her." He didn't say anything, so I chose to keep talking about her. "...I have to protect her from Clyde and from myself. But I can't let go of her. She's my life."
I heard Keigan sigh. "Think of this, Kuya. Can you bear seeing a gun pointed at her head or can you bear seeing her hurt because you saved her?"
I shook my head. Actually, there's no difference. Hurting her badly is like killing her—and me. Hitting two birds with one stone. But the idea of her having a lifeless body is more horrible.
"I can't handle either." I answered, and a few tears fell from my eyes. "...But I'd rather hurt her than let her die because of me."
"You don't have to feel bad about it. You really do have to make sacrifices. You can't protect both Jay-jay and us at the same time. You won't be able to, because your inheritance still isn't with you." He said in a very calm voice. "...But look on the bright side. This is just temporary. Sooner, you'll have your money. You can protect her and never lose her again. You'll have all the time in the world to win her back."
I'm hopeless. I will never win her back. Once I let her go, Yuri or David will take advantage of that. They'll do everything to have Jay-jay for themselves.
And I will lose her forever.
"I hate my life." I said and wiped my tears.
Keigan laughed. "You wouldn't hate our lives."
And I laughed with him. We're sitting on the floor, resting our backs against the couch and laughing together—and it brings back memories. It's a wave of nostalgia.
I really wish we had a normal family. A loving Mom who's still alive. A supportive Dad who puts the family first. And the three of us—Me, Keigan, and Keiren.
"I think we should go to bed. Especially you." Keigan said, and I couldn't disagree. "...You look so stressed."
"I am, indeed."
He stood up first, and I followed. I returned the bottle I was holding to the Mini Bar before walking out.
We walked together in silence, heading to our own bedrooms. I stopped in front of Keiren's room door.
"Go ahead. I'll just check on Keiren."
He nodded and walked ahead. I slowly opened the door to Keiren's room. His favorite mushroom lamp was on. It helps calm him down whenever he has trouble sleeping.
I slowly walked toward him. I picked up the blanket that had fallen to the floor because of how much he moves in his sleep. I covered him with it.
Sorry, Keiren... Sorry that you never got to experience having parents.I'm trying to be both Mom and Dad for you, but I know it's not enough. I hope you grow up strong even without them. I hope you never lose your self-confidence. I hope you become strong—stronger than me or Keigan.I hope you don't become like me.
I kissed his forehead before leaving his room. I quietly closed the door and walked to my room.
I feel exhausted. One by one, I unbuttoned my uniform. When I got to my room, I took off my polo. Just as I threw it onto the bed, a wallet-sized photo fell to the floor.
I forgot about it...
I picked it up and stared at it. Unlike earlier, I didn't smile when I saw her face.
"Jay-jay..." I said and sat on the edge of my bed. "...I know there's a chance that you will never forgive me, but I assure you, I will do anything to become stronger." I set her picture down on my bedside table. "...And when I do, I will protect you no matter what."
As of now, let me save you from my relatives and... from me. For now, I need to focus on my siblings. They need me too.
I spent almost the whole night thinking about what could happen. I didn't even bother to change clothes and fell asleep just like that. I still reeked of alcohol, and I was sure the smell had clung to my bed.
I woke up because of a knock on my bedroom door. Headaches again are kicking in. I forced myself to get up even though it felt like my body didn't want to separate from the bed.
"Kuya! Wake up!" It was Keiren knocking at my door. "We might be late, me and Kuya Keigan!"
"Okay! I'm up!" I shouted.
He stopped knocking. I washed my face with my hands. I was dizzy, and it felt like my head was going to split open with every movement.
I forced myself to get up and nearly collapsed when I stood. I had to take Keigan and Keiren to school. And I also had to face Jay-jay.
It has to be today...
I originally planned to wait a few more days. I didn't want to hurt her one blow after another, but it had to be done. I didn't want to drag it out any longer, because I might not have the strength to go through with it.
I headed straight to the bathroom and took a shower. I didn't stay long and quickly got dressed. I looked at myself in the mirror. My eyes were lifeless and cold.
After getting dressed, I went straight to the dining area where my siblings were eating breakfast.
Keigan looked good today. Like he hadn't cried yesterday. His movements were normal, just like how I usually see him.
"Eat breakfast." I heard someone command.
I looked and raised my eyebrow. "Why are you here again?" I asked irritably.
"No breakfast at home, so I'll just eat here." Honey answered.
I rolled my eyes. She was starting to treat my house like her hangout. Then she'd complain that her uncle gets mad at her for coming over too often.
"What's with your look? You look like a grumpy, heartbroken guy who just got dumped." She said before swallowing her food.
"Just eat, unless you want this to be your last meal here."
She just shrugged and continued eating. I grabbed a glass of coffee and drank it. I really had no appetite. I couldn't even tell if I was hungry because of the heaviness I was feeling.
Keigan and Keiren finished eating first. I asked them to wait for me outside. Once I was sure they were gone, I approached Honey.
"Where's Keigan's maid? Kate?" I asked.
She suddenly stopped eating and looked at me, confused. "She left. Just last night."
My forehead creased. "What?"
"The butler said she ran away."
"But why?"
"Don't know."
I turned my back on her and let her continue eating. Why did she leave? I've lost count of how many maids of Keigan have left this house.
When I got to the garage, I saw Keiren standing beside my car. Keigan was standing silently while reading a book. He even adjusted his glasses before flipping the page.
I chose not to dwell on the maid's departure. I'll think about them some other time.
I unlocked my car and asked them to get in.
"I will put my seatbelt." Keiren said before I could touch him. "You said so."
I let him do it and got in the driver's seat. I started the car and drove them both to school.
They went to different schools. Keigan's school focused more on academics than other activities like sports. The school suited him well because he was smart. Honestly, he and C-in are quite alike.
After dropping them off, I didn't feel like heading to school anymore. I didn't feel like driving at all—like I'd rather crash the car into a post.
This is punishment for me, and it will be punishment for Jay-jay too.But I have to follow my plan. I have to save her.
When I arrived at school, I parked the car and got out. There were only a few students around since it was still early.
As I walked toward our room, it felt like I was walking toward my own death. Each step was heavy.
I just want this day to be over.
When I got to the room, Eman and Josh were already inside. Rory and Edrix were with them too.
They all went silent the moment I entered. I went straight to my seat and sat down without any energy.
Not long after, Drew walked in followed by Blaster. They glanced at me briefly and looked away like I had some kind of disease.
I waited a little longer for the rest to arrive. Most of them avoided me, like they didn't want anything to do with me anymore.
"Wow! Some people are just really shameless!" Mayo muttered before sitting in his seat.
"Can you just shut up already?" Kit said.
Parts of his face were still swollen. As far as I know, he almost went into a coma—good thing he woke up quickly. I just don't know why the hospital discharged him already. I don't know how to apologize to him.
"You're early today." Yuri greeted as he sat down. "...Did something happen?"
I just glanced at him briefly before turning my eyes back to the door. I'm waiting for her to come inside.
I saw C-in walking toward me. I quickly signaled him to stop.
"Stay right there."
"K-Keifer... This is about Jay-jay."
I arched a brow. "And so?"
I could feel our classmates listening in. I also knew they didn't like how I answered him.
"What the hell is wrong with you, Keifer?" Yuri asked, clearly irritated.
"Nothing is wrong with me. But there's definitely something wrong with you all."
I heard a few of them chuckle in disbelief.
"Just listen, Keifer." C-in said, sounding worried. "...Yesterday, Jay-jay... she had an accident. That's why she looked like she was really struggling."
I already knew. Angelo told me and even showed me a CCTV clip from a crossing.
"Who cares." I said, sounding like I didn't give a damn.
But I do.
We're already tracking down those on the motorcycle. I already have a clue who they are. All I need is confirmation, and I will hunt them down.
"Who cares? Are you out of your mind, Keifer?" David asked angrily. "...Didn't you feel even a bit guilty about what you did?"
I didn't answer. I just stared at them. They looked at each other, as if checking if they were all thinking the same thing about me.
"Looks like this is it." Felix said, and they all looked at him. "...You pulled off your plan yesterday, didn't you?"
"Keifer..."
"What about Jay-jay now?"
"I thought we stopped this already?"
They all reacted at once. They couldn't accept what Felix just said.
This is it. This is the only way I could think of. I didn't want this, but this is the most effective way. I know Jay-jay will be mad at them too, but unlike me, there's still a chance she'll forgive them.
I had a different plan in mind at first. I was supposed to involve a girl, but knowing Jay-jay... she'd probably just beat her up.
"You did it already. So what's your plan for Jay-jay now?" Eman said.
"Let's just say Keifer was carried away by his anger. Let's not bring up what we did." It was Blaster, looking really worried.
"Jay-jay will be mad at us." C-in said, almost in tears.
"I don't understand what you're doing." Yuri said.
"Let's just tell her. There's no point hiding it now, that's where this conversation is headed anyway." Eren sounded irritated.
"We can't just do that!" Kit said.
"Just tell the truth already!" David shouted too.
"Don't order Keifer around!" Rory shouted at David. "...He'll say it. He's just waiting for the right time."
"I feel so sorry for Jay-jay." C-in said while looking down.
"We already said to stop this stupid plan!" Eman said, clearly angry.
"As if you're innocent! You were one of the first to push for this stupid plan!" Denzel accused.
Now they're all pointing fingers at each other. Blaming one another when there's really only one person to blame.
Me.
"Just explain it properly and let's all apologize." Blaster suggested.
"Oh, like it's that easy, huh?" Drew said sarcastically.
"Jay-jay won't forgive us." Yuri said.
"We'll make it up to her." said Rory.
"It's not that easy." Edrix replied.
They kept throwing out ideas, blaming each other, panicking. But one thing was clear—they wanted me to tell the truth. They wanted me to tell her.
But all the noise and chaos stopped the moment she stepped into the classroom.
My heart raced.
"J-Jay-jay..." they almost whispered.
"W-what truth? What plan?"
And at that moment,
I knew... we're both going to have a broken heart.