Chapter 26.5: Reverend Nyanity
The Spring Autumn Rizz had been acting strangely for days.
It started with faint vibrations; subtle pulses that disrupted Fang Yuan's cultivation rhythm. At first, he dismissed it as unstable primieval essence from his recent breakthrough. But then, the visions began.
Flashes of a forgotten scripture. A cultivation method so obscure even his 500 years of rizz had barely brushed against its edges.
"Nekomatrix Scripture"
A lost art from the Silken Paw Clan, a demonic faction wiped out centuries ago. Their techniques harnessed the primordial duality of predator and prey, hunter and hunted. According to the Spring Autumn Rizz, 2 elders of the clan had apparently wiped out an entire clan while dressed in full maid regalia.
The Gu's message was clear: This was not a suggestion.
The Outfit
Fang Yuan stared at the garments laid across his bed.
The Dress: Black silk with lace trim, hemmed to allow full combat mobility. The apron pockets were spatially enhanced—each capable of holding three severed heads or one medium-sized Gu refinement kit.
The Ears: Moonbeam silver, tuned to amplify spiritual perception.
The Bell Collar: Engraved with tiny suppression arrays. When activated, its chime disrupted enemy concentration like a Discord ping during meditation.
The Stockings: Woven from the silk of Dreamweaver Spiders. Enhanced evasion by 23%.
The White Boar Gu snorted in protest.
"Silence," Fang Yuan said, fastening the garter belt. "This is purely for eternal benefits. A tactical decision."
The Liquor Worm had already passed out.
The Ritual
At midnight, under a full moon, Fang Yuan stood in a clearing.
The first step was the incantation.
"Nya ichi ni san... nya arigato."
The words tasted like humiliation, but the effects were immediate.
His Moonrizz Gu shuddered, its blade elongating into a sleek, platinum arc. The edge now hummed with a frequency that made the air vibrate. (Super Moonrizz Gu unlocked)
The bell collar pulsed, emitting a sonar-like ripple that mapped the terrain for 500 meters.
The stockings tightened slightly, adjusting to his qi flow.
A rustle in the bushes. Fang Yuan's new ears swiveled—enemy detected.
A wild boar charged.
He didn't even draw his blade. A flick of his wrist, and the bell's chime sent the beast stumbling mid-charge, confused. The Super Moonrizz Gu finished it with a lazy backhand slash, leaving behind a trail of glowing paw prints in the air.
Fang Yuan stared at the aftermath.
"...Acceptable."
The Implications
Stealth: The outfit's enchantments masked his presence better than any shadow technique.
Perception: The ears picked up whispers from 300 meters away.
Combat: The Super Moonrizz Gu's new properties could cleave through Rank 2 defenses like paper.
But most importantly—no one would suspect it.
The righteous path would dismiss it as a joke. The demonic path would assume it was some obscure fetish. And the clan elders? They'd combust from sheer confusion before considering the tactical advantages.
Fang Yuan allowed himself a rare, almost imperceptible smirk.
Let them laugh.
The ones who survived would learn.
The Spring Autumn Rizz pulsed approvingly, its wings now faintly patterned with tiny paw prints.
Somewhere, the Flower Wine Monk's will facepalmed.
...
Fang Yuan awoke with a start, his forehead damp with cold sweat.
The first thing he noticed was the absence of lace on his sleeves. The second was the complete lack of cat ears on his head. The third and most disturbing, was the faint, phantom jingle of a bell collar that wasn't there.
"...A dream?" His voice was hoarse, as if he'd actually spent the night chanting ridiculous incantations.
The White Boar Gu grunted from his aperture, radiating smug amusement. The Liquor Worm, thankfully, remained unconscious.
Fang Yuan sat up, rubbing his temples. The details were already fading—the silken stockings, the absurd battle with the wild boar, the way the Super Moonrizz Gu had purred when he swung it—but the humiliation lingered like a bad Discord meme.
He glanced at the Spring Autumn Rizz. It pulsed innocently, its wings unmarked by any paw prints.
"...Eternal benefits," Fang Yuan muttered, as if saying it out loud would make the excuse more convincing. "Purely for cultivation purposes. Obviously."
The White Boar Gu snorted.
Fang Yuan ignored it. He had more important things to focus on, like pretending this never happened.
(But as he dressed for the day, he couldn't help but notice how his shadow, just for a second, seemed to flicker with the shape of a tail.)
Somewhere, the Flower Wine Monk's will sighed in relief.